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Honey on Your Mind Part 18

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I tapped my palms on the table. "Well, by the look on her face, you would have thought I'd asked her to throw her newborn baby out the window while she was at it, and maybe a couple puppies too. She gave me the evil eye, then walked away, window still closed."

"Skinny yoga b.i.t.c.h," Andie said.

"So that was the end of me and yoga. Namaste." I pressed my palms together and did a little bow.

"What about running?" McKenna took a sip of her wine. "Have you found any good routes around your neighborhood?" Back in San Francisco I'd never been in great shape, but I'd run more or less regularly, or at least enough to make up for my more or less regular ice cream consumption.

I frowned. "I know I should get into some sort of a routine, but I just can't seem to make myself. I've gone for a run a handful of times, but that's about it. I suck."

Andie picked up her wine gla.s.s and waved her free hand dismissively. "I still don't know why you would want to do that anyway."

I looked at her. "You mean run?"

She nodded. "It's just so, I don't know, unnatural."

McKenna laughed. "Unnatural? What do you mean?"

Andie set her wine gla.s.s down and cupped her cheeks with her hands. "I mean just think what all that jarring up and down is doing to your skin, which is already in a losing battle with gravity. I like to think that by not running, I'm preserving the structural integrity of my face."

I laughed. "Did you just say you're preserving the structural integrity of your face?"

McKenna pretended to look for a pen. "I'm writing that one down too."

Andie nodded. "My mom used to say that all the time when I was little. Now that I think about it, it may be the one thing she and I actually agree on."

I laughed again. "You're nuts. Did you know that?"

"We'll see who's nuts when we're fifty." She shrugged and took a sip of her wine.

I tapped my palms on the table. "So hey, we haven't talked about Nick yet. Are you going to move in with him?"

"Oooh yes, do tell," McKenna said. "Now that I'm married with a baby, I need to live vicariously through you two."

Andie shook her head. "I don't want to talk about that tonight, my friends."

I narrowed my eyes. "You don't? Is everything OK?"

She nodded. "Everything's fine. I just don't want to talk about it."

"You sure everything's OK?" McKenna asked.

She nodded again. "I'm sure. I just need a night off from thinking about my future, all right? I'm sick of thinking about my future. Tonight I just want to celebrate my birthday with my best girlfriends and live in the moment."

I knew how that felt.

"OK, birthday girl, we'll table that discussion for later." I turned back to McKenna and refilled her wine gla.s.s. "So when are you going back to work?"

"I'm hoping next month."

"Are you looking forward to it?"

She sighed. "To be honest, yes and no. I mean, on the one hand, I'm dying for more intellectual stimulation, because taking care of a baby can be mind-numbingly boring."

"Now there's a shocking piece of information," Andie said.

"But on the other hand..." McKenna's voice trailed off.

"On the other hand what?" I said.

Suddenly, McKenna began to cry.

"Mackie are you OK?" I put my hand on her shoulder.

She nodded and wiped a tear from her eyes. "I'm fine."

"You sure aren't acting fine," Andie said. "What's going on? Are you still all hormonal? Do I need to give you a shot in the b.u.t.t or something?"

McKenna laughed. "No, really, I'm fine, I swear. It's just that, while I'm eager to get back to work, the thought of leaving Elizabeth...it's just...hard."

I kept my hand on her shoulder. "You really love her, don't you?"

She smiled. "Wave, you have no idea. It's indescribable."

"You know what I love?" Andie said, standing up to use the restroom.

We both looked at her.

"Uninterrupted sleep. And s.e.x whenever I want. And spit-up-free clothes."

McKenna laughed again and wiped her tears away with a napkin. "Stop it."

"And of course I love you as well." Andie blew McKenna a kiss as she walked away. As soon as she was gone, I flagged the waiter and told him it was Andie's birthday. He nodded politely and quickly disappeared.

"So when will you know for sure when you're going back?" I picked up my wine gla.s.s and turned back to McKenna.

"We just need to find the right nanny, which is a lot harder than I thought it would be. Now that Elizabeth is an actual person and not just the idea of one, the thought of leaving her with a stranger all day every day is scary."

Andie reappeared and sat back down. "What's scary?"

"The thought of leaving Elizabeth with a stranger," McKenna said.

Andie shook her head and lowered her voice. "I can only imagine. I get nervous when I let a stranger wax my privates."

"And there's another one for the list," McKenna said.

I laughed. "Oh, how I've missed you, Andie Barnett."

"And oh, how Andie Barnett has missed you back." She rubbed her hands together. "So let's get this party started. I heard there are great places to go dancing in the Meatpacking District. What do you ladies think?"

"Dancing?" McKenna and I said at the same time.

Andie stretched her tiny arms over her head and nodded.

"Are you serious?" McKenna said.

"Yeah, why not?"

McKenna looked at me. "Do you go dancing very often?"

I laughed. "Is that a rhetorical question?"

"How many times have you been dancing since you moved to New York?" Andie asked.

I held up a fist to start counting on my fingers. "That would be...zero." I kept my hand in a fist.

McKenna looked at Andie. "We're in our thirties, now, Andie. I have a child. I think dancing in the Meatpacking District is in the rearview mirror." She pointed her thumb over her shoulder.

"On the contrary." Andie shook her head. "That pathetic, fat egg Waverly just showed us is exactly why we should go dancing. Come on, ladies, we're in New York! It's Friday night, and it's my birthday, and now you want to, what, just go home?"

McKenna and I exchanged glances.

"Yes?" I said.

"Wrong answer." Andie pounded her hand lightly against the table. "I'm the birthday girl, so you two have to do what I say. And I say that we are not going home."

"We're not?" I said.

She shook her head. "Definitely not."

"I don't like the sound of this," McKenna said.

"Have you ever noticed that you're sort of bossy?" I said to Andie.

"Why, thank you," Andie said.

Just then, the waiter appeared with a slice of cake, a big candle on top.

Andie grinned and put her hand on her heart. "For moi?"

I grinned back. "Of course! Nothing but the best for the birthday girl."

She pushed her hair behind her ears and leaned toward us. "Nice. Now ladies, before I blow out this candle, I want you to remember something."

We looked at her.

She held up three fingers with each hand. "I'm thirty-three, and this weekend it's all about me. You got that? Thirty-three, and it's all about me."

McKenna laughed. "Noted."

We sang happy birthday, and as Andie blew out the candle, I scooted next to her and put my arm around her. "Did I mention how much I've missed you?"

a a a "How much?"

"Sixty-six."

"Sixty-six dollars for three drinks?"

The bartender gave me a curt nod. "Would you like to open a tab?"

"Um, I guess so." I reached into my purse, but just then, Andie appeared and shooed me away.

"Move aside, amateur." She handed the bartender her credit card. "Can you add three tequila shots to that order? Top shelf, please."

The bartender smiled at her. "Coming right up."

As I stepped back, I looked to my right and saw two younger women aggressively jostling for bar s.p.a.ce next to Andie. They looked just out of high school and were dressed in spandex, ultra-short minidresses that barely covered their behinds, not to mention their water-balloonish cleavage.

I turned the other way and lowered my voice to McKenna. "Holy underage prost.i.tution ring, do you see the outfits on the other side of me? Those girls look like they're about fourteen. Did you dress like that when you were fourteen?"

"I wore a headgear when I was fourteen."

I laughed, then leaned toward the bar and poked my head over Andie's shoulder. "By the way, did you just say shots?"

She grinned and nodded. "Oh yes, I did."

"I can't remember the last time I did a shot," McKenna said.

"It's got to be hard to do a shot with a headgear on." I looked behind her at the crowd, which was filled with girls in outrageous outfits that were equally-if not more-s.l.u.tty than those of the two at the bar. Who were these people?

Andie handed each of us a tiny gla.s.s. "I remember the last time you did a shot, McKenna."

"You do? When was it?"

Andie grinned. "About five seconds from now."

McKenna laughed. "Thanks for remembering."

"Anytime. Ready, girls? Here's to a night full of birthday memories so fun we won't even remember them."

I laughed. "What?"

"You heard me. Now drink, TV girl. I'm thirty-three, and it's all about me, remember?"

I looked at McKenna, who was preparing to take her shot.

"You're really doing it?"

She shrugged "When in Rome. Or the Meatpacking District, I guess."

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Honey on Your Mind Part 18 summary

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