Hobson's Choice: A Lancashire Comedy in Four Acts Part 30

HOBSON. Never mind what it is. Are you coming or not?

VICKEY. No.

HOBSON. Then you that aren't willing can leave me to talk with them that are.

ALICE. Do you mean that we're to go?

HOBSON. I understand you've homes to go to.

ALICE. Oh, father!

HOBSON. Open the door for them, Will.

(WILL _rises, crosses, and opens door_. ALICE _and_ VICKEY _stare in silent anger. Then_ ALICE _sweeps to her gloves on the table_.)

ALICE. Vickey!

(ALICE _moves on towards door_.)

VICKEY. Well, I don't know!

MAGGIE (_from her chair by the fire-place_). We'll be glad to see you here at tea-time on a Sunday afternoon if you'll condescend to come sometimes.

VICKEY. Beggars on horseback.

(VICKEY _and_ ALICE _pa.s.s out_.)

WILL (_closing door_). Nay, come, there's no ill-will. (He _returns to table and sits_ R. _of it_.)

HOBSON. Now, my lad, I'll tell you what I'll do.

WILLIE. Aye, we can come to grips better now there are no fine ladies about.

HOBSON. They've got stiff necks with pride, and the difference between you two and them's a thing I ought to mark and that I'm going to mark.

There's times for holding back and times for letting loose, and being generous. Now, you're coming here, to this house, both of you, and you can have the back bedroom for your own and the use of this room split along with me. Maggie 'ull keep house, and if she's time to spare she can lend a hand in the shop. I'm finding Will a job. You can come back to your old bench in the cellar, Will, and I'll pay you the old wage of eighteen shillings a week and you and me 'ull go equal whacks in the cost of the housekeeping, and if that's not handsome, I dunno what is.

I'm finding you a house rent free and paying half the keep of your wife.

WILLIE. Come home, Maggie. (_He rises, goes_ L.)

MAGGIE. I think I'll have to. (_She rises_.)

HOBSON. Whatever's the hurry for?

WILLIE. It may be news to you--(_moving a little_ R.),--but I've a business round in Oldfield Road and I'm neglecting it with wasting my time here.

HOBSON. Wasting time? Maggie, what's the matter with Will? I've made him a proposal.

MAGGIE. He's a shop of his own to see to, father.

HOBSON. (_incredulous_). A man who's offered a job at Hobson's doesn't want to worry with a shop of his own in a wretched cellar in Oldfield Road.

WILLIE. Shall I tell him, Maggie, or shall we go?

HOBSON. Go! I don't want to keep a man who--(_Rises_.)

MAGGIE. If he goes, I go with him, father. You'd better speak out, Will.

WILLIE. All right, I will. We've been a year in yon wretched cellar and do you know what we've done? We've paid off Mrs. Hepworth what she lent us for our start and made a bit o' bra.s.s on top o' that. We've got your high-cla.s.s trade away from you. That shop's a cellar, and as you say, it's wretched, but they come to us in it, and they don't come to you.

Your trade's gone down till all you sell is clogs. You've got no trade, and me and Maggie's got it all and now you're on your bended knees to her to come and live with you, and all you think to offer me is my old job at eighteen shillings a week. Me that's the owner of a business that is starving yours to death.

HOBSON. But--but--you're Will Mossop, you're my old shoe hand.

WILLIE. Aye. I were, but I've moved on a bit since then. Your daughter married me and set about my education. And--and now I'll tell you what I'll do and it'll be the handsome thing and all from me to you. I'll close my shop--

HOBSON. Oh! That doesn't sound like doing so well.

WILLIE. I'm doing well, but I'll do better here. I'll transfer to this address and what I'll do that's generous is this: I'll take you into partnership and give you your half-share on the condition you're sleeping partner and you don't try interference on with me. (_Goes_ L.)

HOBSON. A partner! You--here--

WILLIE. William Mossop, late Hobson, is the name this shop 'ull have.

MAGGIE. Wait a bit, Will. I don't agree to that.

HOBSON (_over to her_). Oh, so you have piped up at last. I began to think you'd both lost your senses together.

MAGGIE. It had better not be "late Hobson."

WILLIE (L. C.). Well, I meant it should.

HOBSON. Just wait a bit. I want to know if I'm taking this in aright.

(_Moves_ R. C.) I'm to be given a half-share in my own business on condition I take no part in running it. Is that what you said?

WILLIE. That's it.

HOBSON. Well, I've heard of impudence before, but--

MAGGIE. It's all right, father.

HOBSON. But did you hear what he said?

MAGGIE. Yes. That's settled. Quite settled, father. (_Pushing him_.) It's only the name we're arguing about. (_To_ WILL.) I won't have "late Hobson's", Will.

HOBSON. I'm not dead, yet, my lad, and I'll show you I'm not.

MAGGIE. I think Hobson and Mossop is best.

HOBSON. His name on my sign-board!