His Hour Part 34

Now of what use to write of the days that followed--the stiff restrained days--or of the arrival of Tom Underdown and his sister, and Millicent Hardcastle--or of the splendid Russian ceremonies in the church or the quieter ones at the Emba.s.sy. All that it concerns us to know is that Gritzko and Tamara were at last alone on this their wedding night. Alone with all their future before them. Both their faces had been grave and solemn through all the vows and prayers, but afterward his had shone with a wild triumph. And as they had driven to his house on the Fontonka he had held Tamara's hand but had not spoken.

It was a strange eventful moment when he led her up the great stairs between the rows of bowing servants--up into the salons all decorated with flowers. Then, still never speaking, he opened the ballroom doors, and when they had walked its great length and came to the rooms beyond, he merely said:

"These you must have done by that man in Paris--or how you please," as though the matter were aloof, and did not interest him. And then instead of turning into his own sitting-room, he opened a door on the right, which Tamara did not know, and they entered what had been his mother's bedroom. It was warmed and lit, but it wore that strange air of gloom and melancholy which untenanted rooms, consecrated to the memory of the dead, always have, in spite of blue satin and bright gilding.

"Tamara," he said, and he took her hand, "these were my mother's rooms.

I loved her very much, and I always thought I would never let any woman--even my wife--enter them. I have left them just as she used them last. But now I know that is not what she would have wished."

His deep voice trembled a little with a note of feeling in it which was new, and which touched Tamara's innermost being.

"I want you to see them now with me, and then while we are in the South all these things shall be taken away, and they shall be left bare and white for you to arrange them when we come back, just as you would like. I want my mother's blessing to rest on us--which it will do--"

Then he paused, and there was a wonderful silence, and when he went on, his tones were full of a great tenderness.

"Little one, in these rooms, some day I will make you happy."

Tamara trembled so she could hardly stand, the reaction from her misery was so immense. She swayed a little and put out her hand to steady herself by the back of a chair. He thought she was going to fall, seeing her so white, and he put his arm round her as he led her through the room and into the sitting-room, and then beyond again to a little sanctuary. Here a lamp swung before the Ikon, and the colors were subdued and rich, while the virgin's soft eyes looked down upon them.

There were fresh lilies, too, in a vase below, and their scent perfumed the air. He knelt for a second and whispered a prayer, then he rose, and they looked into each other's eyes--and their souls met--and all shadows rolled away.

"Tamara!" he said, and he held out his arms--and with a little inarticulate cry almost of pain Tamara fell into them--and he folded her to his heart--while he bent and kissed her hair.

Then he held her from him and looked deep into her eyes.

"Sweetheart--am I forgiven?" he asked, and when she could speak she answered:

"Yes--you are forgiven."

Then he questioned again.

"Tamara, do you love me?"

But he saw the answer in her sweet face, and did not wait for her to speak, but kissed her mouth.

Then he lifted her in his arms like a baby and carried her back through the ghostly rooms to his warm human sitting-room, and there he laid her tenderly down upon the couch and knelt beside her.

"Oh, my heart," he said. "What this time has been--since you promised to marry me!--but I would not change it--I wanted you to love me beyond everything--beyond anger with me, beyond--fear--beyond your pride. Now tell me you do. My sweet one. Moia Doushka. I must know. I _must_ know.

You mean my life--tell me?"

And pa.s.sion overcame Tamara, and she answered him in a low voice of vibrating emotion.

"Gritzko! do you think I care for what you have done or will do! You know very well I have always loved you!" And she put up her mouth for him to kiss her. Then he went quite mad for a few moments with joy--he caressed her as even on the dawn-drive she had never dreamed, and presently he said with deep earnestness.

"Darling, we must live for one another--in the world of course for duty; but our real life shall be alone at Milaslav for only you and me.

You must teach me to be calm and to banish impossible thoughts. You must make yourself my center--Tamara, you must forget all your former life, and give yourself to me, sweetheart. My country must be your country, my body your body, and my soul your soul. I love you better than heaven or earth--and you are mine now till death do us part."

Then the glory of paradise seemed to descend upon Tamara, as he bent and kissed her lips.

Oh! what did anything else matter in the world since after all he loved her! This beautiful fierce lover!

Visions of enchantment presented themselves--a complete intoxication of joy.

He held her in his arms, and all the strange pa.s.sion and mystic depths which had fascinated her always, now dwelt in his eyes, only intensified by delirious love.

"Do you remember, Sweetheart, how you defied and resisted me? Darling!

Heart of mine! but I have conquered you and taken you, in spite of all!

You cannot struggle any more, you are my own. Only you must tell me that you give me, too, your soul. Ah! you said once I should have no part or lot in that matter. Tamara, tell me that I have it?"

And Tamara thrilled with ecstasy as she whispered, "Yes, you have it."

She cared not at all about pride--she did not wish to struggle, she adored being conquered. Her entire being was merged in his.

He held her from him for a second and the old whimsical smile full of tender mischief stole into his eyes.

"That night at the hut--when you dropped the pistol when--well, don't you want to know what really did happen?" he said.

She buried her face in his scarlet coat.

"Oh, no, no, no!" she cried. "It is all forgotten and forgiven."

Then with wild pa.s.sion he clasped her to his breast.

"Oh! Love!" he said. "My sweet Princess; the G.o.ds are very kind to us, for all happiness is yet to come--! I did but kiss your little feet."