Help! Gooogle-sensei!! Vol 1 Chapter 1

  Humans in this world will get from the world after they are 10 years old.

From artificial objects like swords or bows, until natural phenomenon like fire or wind, even something metaphysical like food or dreams, in other words everything that have existed since long ago will have a .

It’s just, since the so-called granting of is greatly affected by chance, so the first-rate bread maker that holds Divine Protection can’t do anything to make his son get Divine Protection, he can only rely on luck.

　For the time being, it’s known that the experience and desire of someone will affect the type of Divine Protection they get after they reach 10 years old, so the chance for a boy that aspires the path of sword to get Sword Divine Protection is quite high.

Everyone will get at least 1 Divine Protection, and if you’re lucky, you can get 2 or 3, but in that case, the grade of the Divine Protection will decrease by 1 and they can only become the jack of all trades.

Actually, a child that was born in a military lineage was trained to use sword, spear, and bow since young, and that child got all three divine protections of Sword, Spear, and Bow.

However, all the grades are only 4, so they couldn’t win against Swordsmen, Spearmen, and Bowmen that holds a grade 3 divine protection.

Well, naturally you can’t wield sword, spear, and bow on the same time. And that boy run away in despair.

From this result, the leading researcher for Divine Protection said this.

First, soul have innate trait, and until the person in question become 10 years old, the experience and desire will decide the number of the Divine Protection they will get and nourish it. Moreover, the Divine Protection you will get, will correspondent to the capacity of your own soul and allotting the grades. If that previous boy only focus on 1 not 3, maybe he can get Grade 1. He was a great raw ore.

Putting that aside, today is my, 3rd prince Karl of Grosse Kingdom, tenth birthday.

“Because Karl-niichan is a b.o.o.bs lover, b.o.o.bs Divine Protection will suit you well.”

This unhateable and cutest twin little sister Charlotte is grinning while poking fun at me.

Because I still have the memory of my past life, naturally I’m already mature, I have always pampered this tomboy girl while I watch over her for 24 hours.

As a result, I became a severe siscon. However, Charlotte have also become a brocon so no problems.

However, b.o.o.bs Divine Protection huh…… It’s not impossible so it’s scary.

Actually, the collaboration of my memory from past life, this child body, and royal lineage, has given me a life to enjoy a woman’s body.

Because, this body doesn’t have any secondary s.e.x characteristic. That means I can’t realize something like greasy cabinet minister press down a pure maiden-kind of sticky eros.

However, a male, even without libido, is a creature that likes b.o.o.bs very much.

Even in a large voice is fine. I love b.o.o.bs!!

Still [b.o.o.bs] Divine Protection huh…… Well as expected it is bad for royalty to get that right?

No no? Probably this thing will make every girl in this world drool, desiring for full b.r.e.a.s.t.s right?

“Yeah, if I got b.o.o.bs Divine Protection, I will return this cheeky little sister’s b.o.o.bs that are starting to bulge into washboard again. This is my love as a brother”

“Noo-!”

That sort of Charlotte that laughs in high-pitched sound is cute. And a bit frightening.

Well it’s natural for me who can’t conclude who are more superior, big brother or little sister.

I’m also nervous myself and my anxiety is rising. But, I can’t let my hands tremble because my hand is holding my little sister’s trembling hand.

This is something that was called a man’s pride.

All right, the curtain is rising, starting our debut time.

Our father is sitting on the throne, and my big brothers, Golden Lion and Moon Shadow, are standing on both of our father’s sides, and on the side is my big-breasted older sister.

There are permanent n.o.bles with their children lining up on the left and right side of audience room, and there’s a big crystal ball for appraisal enshrined at the center of this room.

This appraisal crystal ball will display the divine protection of someone that touches it with letters of light.

Not only showing the divine protection’s name politely, but this thing can even show the grade until Special Grade. What a courteous thing.

Just by imagining the future of [b.o.o.bs : Special Grade], made me break into a cold sweat a bit.

Maybe because there’re only a few children that became a genuine b.o.o.bs lover before their secondary s.e.x characteristic develops, that kind of Divine Protection is extremely rare, but I will refuse to get that.

While my heartbeat is rising, without breaking the royalty smile, I step on the red carpet along with Charlotte towards that big crystal ball.

Charlotte holds my hand tightly.

Ah, s.h.i.t, Charlotte is too cute, my royalty smile will break.

If I think, when I was in previous world, I only have 2 brothers. It was fun but having little sister is different.

A person with no real little sister that only fantasizes about…… well that kind of people exists, but if their little sister is Charlotte, I am sure they would be love struck. Cute little sister is a different case indeed.

If I got [Little Sister: Special Grade] what must I do?

No, I will accept that! I think Charlotte will accept it too! (Wishful thinking)

While thinking that stupid thing, we arrived at the front of big crystal ball.

Father, Wilhelm-tousama is staring at us with strong emotions by slightly casting down his eyes.

In return for giving birth to both of us, my mother’s condition kept deteriorating and she died in less than a year.

And those orphans will receive today, so my heart are filled with strong feelings to become an adult.

I remember my mother face that gave birth to us by risking her life, but my little sister didn’t remember it.

My ‘Another world is here, yeah!’ feelings disappeared along with the death of my mother in this world.

While I was wandering in the middle of my subconsciousness to search the figure of my mother, I hug Charlotte, and together with her I cried.

“Karl, Charlotte, I’m glad for both of you to be able to receive the coming of age ceremony.”

Socially, 10 years is still a child but, after receiving , they will make full use of it and carry their duty as an adult.

Of course because of the thinness of social experience, they can’t receive a public office job yet, but it is an age when someone can be treated as a criminal.

Also, they must think deeply about their life according to what they got, and after that they will start their first step towards adulthood, and those implications are included in this ceremony.

Commonly, this ceremony takes place at the town church with a small crystal ball, but for me and Charlotte who are from royalty, our ceremony included formal debut ceremony.

After this, there will be a dinner party to celebrate our official debut in society, but all the women are attracted to Golden Lion-niisan and Moon Shadow-niisan like D*son’s suction power, well it makes me at ease. However, I must protect Charlotte from rotten heretics (n.o.bles’ children) .If you want to make Charlotte into your wife, you must defeat the human weapon called Leo-niisama and Sieg-niisama first! Because both of them are closet siscon you know! Prepare yourself!

[TL note: Dyson, a vacuum cleaner brand]

“Then, we will start the coming of age ceremony. Please touch this crystal ball.”

Abide to our father’s voice, we extend our hand, and we stare each other like to decide who is first.

“It will a problem for Karl-oniisama to get some strange Divine Protection, so can I touch it first?”

I haven’t gotten the joke b.o.o.bs yet. This loveable child.

Charlotte grasp my hand tightly with all of her power, she touches the crystal ball with her other hand while holding her trembling body that was caused by anxiousness.

A faint light is rising from the Appraisal Crystal Ball, and formed letters of light in the air.

[Nature: Special Grade] [Universe: Special Grade] [Love: Special Grade]

Three Special Grade Divine Protections, it’s a proof of heroic figure without doubt.

Those ‘s effect are still unknown for now, but from the aligned words, all of the people gathered in this audience room expect the endless possibilities from those.

Charlotte turns to me with a relieved smile.

Ah, if only there’s a digital camera in this word.

I heartily save that Charlotte’s smile in a folder in my brain.

Well, next is my turn.

While concealing my trembling from anxiety and nervousness, I extend my hand to the crystal ball.

Because the thought of getting [b.o.o.bs] or [Little Sister] start to appear in my mind, I start to chant Gyate Gyate from heart sutra and touch that.

[TL note: http://www.amidatrust.com/heartsutra.html%5D

Somehow G.o.ds or Buddhas granted my wish for b.o.o.bs to not appear, but actually I don’t get any .

There’s no person that didn’t know it’s a breach of manners to make a fuss in front of the king, but all of them start to make a fuss.

I tried to stroke the crystal ball many times, but that thing didn’t recite anything.

While the commotion become bigger, a maid kneeled before my feet, and she offered a crystal ball from the town’s church.

Charlotte grasp my hand tightly. And, it meant something different from the previous nervousness.

Violent palpitations start to reach my ears, and while suppressing my body that seems like it will tremble, I touch that small crystal ball.

And, that small crystal ball didn’t recite anything too.

The third son of royal family didn’t receive any .

Even if they tried to conceal the truth from the public, that would surely fail.

“The dinner party will be suspended. Sorry, even though you look forward to your social debut”

It’s not me, somehow Charlotte is the one who is crying.

Because I was being cried on since before, I can’t even feel sad.

“Your dress for dinner is beautiful. So? Won’t you show it to your niichan?”

Still burying her face into my chest, Charlotte can only sob.

I extend my hand to her shoulder, but Charlotte didn’t want to separate her face from my chest, since she used both of her hands to strongly cling to my back.

In the center of audience room that lost its inhabitants, I can only stand still while Charlotte is still clinging on me.

Our father, brother, and every permanent n.o.bles opened a meeting regarding this incident.

Because both of my brother are too brilliant, the failure of me, the third son, will only bring a trivial scandal.

Because the nation called Grosse isn’t a one-sheet country, and it isn’t a country that will split because of faction war from this incident.

[ED Note: one sheet probably means something like easy to fall apart]

Not receiving any is a very rare phenomenon even among commoners, not to say for royalty and n.o.bles, so there’s no way that anyone can predict this.

Just, for one powerless child to be left out by his surrounding brothers and sisters that are 10 times more superior.

Maybe this case wouldn’t become a great topic for neighbouring country.

Because the threat of Leo-niisama and Sieg-niisama that are already weapon-like humans didn’t increase into three brothers.

Just like 200 nuclear weapon didn’t increase into 300, just like that.

Relieved because of my powerlessness, or possibly frightened by a new threat from Charlotte, just like that.

As for my residence, maybe inside the castle or a house arrest in a summer resort until the end of my life.

Even if it was rotten, I lived inside the royal palace for 10 years, as a result, I know the circ.u.mstances in here substantially.

The only dreadful thing is the fanatics from church.

The fanatics is the faction of people that idolize and worship humans that hold , and make some nonsense diary from hearing their G.o.d’s words into bible.

Although the research of made a progress, and since there’s no relation between the increase or decrease of with the faith and donations to the church or G.o.d, the authority of church fell to the ground. To the extent as if sinking in the ground.

However, because every person with a deep faith that have fallen to the ground wants to ascend to heaven, there’s a chance they will rush and blame me as a cursed child that have been abandoned by Divine Protection, or a devil’s child.

Naturally if you point your sword towards royalty, it means a straw rope will go along your neck in one fell swoop, so making me the royalty as a decoy will be a last bargain?

As long as I don’t have any , I’m not an adult yet, and no to mention there’s a chance for my child to not to be able to get any Divine Protection so I will be a lifetime single virgin.

“I’m…… Sorry”

Suddenly Charlotte, who is still crying, said an apology.

“I stole Karl-niichan’s Divine Protection……”

“I think that wasn’t the case.”

Because we are twins, it didn’t mean that the Divine Protection will dwell only on one of us.

The current mainstream, granting theory was wrong.

　If you consider the fact that my soul capacity are full after containing my previous self and because of that I can’t receive any , maybe it was like that.

All of it was my fault.

“Charlotte’s Divine Protection is Charlotte’s. You didn’t steal Nii-chan’s Divine Protection. So you can’t say it’s your fault okay?”

　I’m happy for my cute little sister to cry because of me, but I feel a little bad too.

　Ah, s.h.i.t. She is really cute.

“It is that. Your nii-chan’s pa.s.sion towards b.o.o.bs isn’t enough. I think G.o.d will surely grant me b.o.o.bs Divine Protection after I concentrate my pa.s.sion towards it for another 10 years.”

　There’s no example for someone to get when they are already old.

　 is already fixed at the time it was given, there’s no choice other than polishing the ability to use it.

I think it’s a bulls.h.i.t for someone to accept that, but I do it to deceive Charlotte on purpose.

“Stuuupid”

The sound that have become soggy because of nasal mucus and tears are reverberating in the area around my stomach.

And the announced result, I will go to the royalty’s summer resort for recuperating from illness.

Looks like it will be as if the 3rd son of Grosse royal family was suddenly struck by an illness, and he didn’t go through the coming of age ceremony.

Life with 3 meals and a sleep a day until old, if it was on previous world, certainly it will be a wonderful treatment.

Life of retired person at 10 years old. Hmm, I feel this would make a good light novel t.i.tle.

Let’s try to write something in the spare time of my retired person life.

“Then, Chichiou…… Wilhelm-tousama, take care of your health”

[TN: since before he refer to his father with Chichiougimi/kimi, literally means Father King from the kanjis]

“I think it should be you who are recuperating from illness, Karl.”

Oh, that’s right, if you mention that.

Bitter smile are spilling between both of us.

[TL Note: can’t seem to translate into anything other than this. 苦笑いが二人の間に零れる. tell us if you have any better suggestion]

I will be escorted by Leo-niisama and Sieg-niisama on my outward journey.

With this every bandit that would meet us will be so pitiable, I feel so safe.

We will be setting off in the midnight quietly, we will gather at royalty’s…… No, on royalty-only seeing-off place.

Because of crying for the whole night, her eyes are swollen, certainly it’s in poor shape and yet she’s still cute.

Looks like Louise-kyonyuu-neesama is troubled about how to greet me.

I didn’t need any consolation words, just let me bury my face into that breast.

“You really match the dress. Even though your face is a bit poor.”

I smile to Charlotte, who is still dressed in party dress that is out-of-place.

“Uu……”

That upturned eyes that filled with dissatisfaction start to flow with tears, and furthermore she shows her cute face.

That dress is certainly for dinner party. That thin blue satin really matches Charlotte.

Even if it was red or black, it still will be a good match to Charlotte though.

“Ooh, Karl.  Even though Charlotte have come to you with a stylish dress like that, isn’t it no good if you don’t praise her honestly?”

Louise-kyonyuu-neesama persuaded me with a bitter smile.

Nee-sama is smiling, but she seems sad for parting with me.

That jiggling b.o.o.bs and a bit clouded eyes show her sadness.

I understand those b.o.o.bs’ feelings for me!

Well, that kind behaviour like exchanging long conversation isn’t man-like.

“It’s not a farewell for forever, so say your farewells easily. Then, I will depart now. Father, Elder Sister, Charlotte, take care of yourself!”

Well, this doesn’t mean I can’t meet them again.

It feels a bit like the time when I was graduating from school, well like that.

It’s something like, I will go to Tokyo to buy Ginza Mountain.

[TL Note: dunno what does this mean, Ginza can also mean silvermint]

Walking while facing the sky, yeah, a man’s worth is shown when he didn’t shed any tears.

And when I want to ride the good-looked carriage, I was. .h.i.t directly with a human torpedo.

“Gefuu!”

My spine! My Spine! Bent to weird angle!?

Charlotte warhead is destroying my back by grinding it!!

“Karl-niichan, Karl-niichan, Karl-niichan……”

Being hugged by a cute little sister from the back, for the outsider this scene is beautiful, but the bear hug from Charlotte who got Special Grade is a matter of life and death. I think her manifested unconsciously, I can’t- I can’t breathe.

“Cha-Charlotte…… your nii-chan is dying……“

Is she complying with my desperate wish? Charlotte released her bear hug.

Fresh air is great.

And my shoulder was gripped and my body was turned around lightly to face her face, and with her flushed cheek and cloudy eyes, she look up at me.

Ah, even though she is still 10 years old, a woman is a woman, I was fascinated by that erotic expression, and I automatically zoom that up.

No, it’s not a zoom up, I’m closing to her physically.

Charlotte’s slender arm surround the back of my head and with a force like a hydraulic jack, she pulled my head and the distance between me and Charlotte are closing forcefully.

And with a force our lips overlapped.

Is this the power of Love, her warm gentle feelings are overflowing from her lips, and euphoria charmed my brain.

　That contact didn’t even last for 10 seconds, but it feels like the time we had pa.s.sed before an eternity.

“Ummm…… Cha-”

When I want to say something, Charlotte turned around and escaped with lightning speed.

However, she didn’t come back.

And the people remaining here are 5 of us.

Silence dominates the place.

“Hm. *cough*! Then Karl, good health”

The first one to retake his mind is my father, and he try to advance as something that happened before didn’t happened.

“E-ehh, Karl, take care of yourself”

Louise-kyonyuu-neesama also went with father’s flow.

“Leave the safety on road to me!”

Leo-niisama decided sternly. As expected, Golden Lion aniki is reliable.

“Fufu, I won’t allow any injury on you with this bow, Karl”

Sieg-niisama decided collectedly. Occasionally I feel some Chuuni vibes from Sieg-niisama.

And the atmosphere become awkward because of that att.i.tude.

“Yes, then it will be a farewell for a while!”

I don’t even understand what I’m saying, but I will join the flow too for now.

The farewell for the 10 years old third prince of Grosse Kingdom should be a sad farewell, and thus this memory will be an awkward memory for our family.

Time flows, and the life at summer resort wasn’t bad.

Living at a mansion with beautiful lake sh.o.r.e view, and the escorts and servants too, they didn’t antagonize me.

It’s a leisure post that starts since I’m 10 years old and will continue for 60 years, but there’s no servant that complain about it.

Even if I have the lineage, I don’t have , and as the standard of another world, even though there’s a grade that is differentiating people, I admired all of them because they didn’t look down on me.

There’s Heinz-rou who holds Grade 1 Divine Protection, I call him Sebastian in my mind, there’s Rony is a cook who have the experience as a court chef, and he holds Grade 1 Divine Protection, and as for head maid is Rottenmeier-san, she hold Grade 1 Divine Protection.

[TL Note: rou=suffix for old person]

They are on the top list and followed by servants that holds Grade 2 to Grade 3 , and each of them have and job to boast, all of them are willing to work for me.

The only impression I have for that kind of servants is only 1.

“What a waste……”

They are like j.a.panese, what a waste of character.

Even if I have a royal lineage, is there any need for this useless person to get this kind of service?

4 tatami and 1 ken, no, 2LDK is already enough for me.

After that, hiring an auntie from the neighbourhood as maid would be sufficient.

I’m thinking like this because, as long as they work here, the cold reality is that they will never rise above here.

All of the servants have already known about my inability, so that means all of the servants won’t be released and will stay at this land until I die.

And I’m 10 years old, the youngest person in this mansion, so I’m in the last order to die.

Die here by fatty food? Death by unhealthy life in this world too?

My mother from the previous world, I’m sorry, it looks like I will go through an overweight life and have a short life in this world too.

I think it’s tough for their mind who are full of talents to be detained in here because of my circ.u.mstances.

Just by living, I’m troubling someone. That kind of feeling.

Still, I didn’t mean I want to die.

On the other hand, I can’t do anything for them.

Not having is the same as not having job.

Even if I train my body by swinging sword for 50 years, and I get an excellent sword too, I will lose to a mere 10 years old who only hold Grade 5 Divine Protection using only a tree branch, not even a wooden sword.

If I lock his hands by surprise, I think there’s a chance for me to win, but it’s a world where your defeat will be guaranteed if you fight from the front.

Something called effort is an insignificant thing, it’s a world where I can’t spread my future.

Just, for them who thinks having is common sense, I can’t be pessimistic.

About how to effectively use the obtained , I think there’s a worth for putting an effort for that.

Even if there’s the wall called Special Grade, for Grade 5, there are top and bottom of it, or for Grade 1, there are also top and bottom of it, so effort and study still have a meaning.

Just, that kind of thing didn’t have any relation to me.

Such an effort is useless. Cause I don’t have any

I have been useless for a month since that, but the more useless I become, all the servants start to worry about overlooking their master’s condition.

Because I’m not allowed to rot on the bed, I decide to not become useless by fishing at the bridge on lakesh.o.r.e.

Because I don’t have either nor Divine Protection, sometimes I have a catch or didn’t get any, but when I got a big haul, I feel so happy.

I feel that the fish was really delicious after it got cooked by Rony the chef.

Because I spent my life not by farming but by fishing, at a certain day, Heinz-rou the butler asked me 1 question.

“Though it’s impolite of me, I think Karl-sama didn’t have any regarding fishing, but why are you fishing every day?”

Even for not having on for fishing, oh it’s that, paying attention to word usage.

Just, I can’t understand the intention of that question, and it took several minutes for me to think, and after that I answered him like this.

“If I had the Divine Protection, I will certainly get fish after casting the fishing line right. Because I didn’t know if I would get a fish after casting, I casted the fishing line. If I got a catch, I’m happy, if not I will be disappointed, and I’m so happy if I got a big haul. It is interesting, right?”

Heinz-rou pondered for a while after hearing my answer, and after that he open his eye widely and laughed.

Among , among the people that will always be rewarded for their effort and study, they won’t understand the joy called effort when it’s not certain whether you will be rewarded or not.

Not a bird in the cage, but a bird in the Divine Protection.

[TL Note: a pun, divine protection is read as kago, the same reading as the usual cage]

It was the moment when one old bird that only want to fly in the success that have been promised from by the world, escape from .

Since then, the fisher at the bridge became two.

Sometimes, only one side have the glory of winning for getting a big hit and the other one know the taste of defeat, sometimes both of them didn’t get anything and both of them comforts each other, and sometimes they argue about who got the bigger fish childishly.

Time flows, the life on summer resort wasn’t bad.