Heartwishes Part 36

He had to work to calm himself down. When he turned the door lever and it opened, fear began to go through him. He hoped she was asleep in her bed and hadn't heard his knock over the storm. But if she was, he was going to remind her that he'd specifically told her that she had to keep her door locked at all times.

But her bed was empty. It had been slept in, but there was no one in it now. He looked about the place with a lawman's eye, but he saw no signs of struggle. Her pajamas had been tossed on the unmade bed, so it looked as though she'd dressed before she went out. But her car was here, and he'd never seen Gemma drive a utility vehicle, even though Lanny had said he'd made one available to her, so where was she?

"She's with Shamus," Colin said aloud as he went outside and got in his car. He drove over the winding gravel paths that ran through the Frazier land until he came to the big warehouse at the back in record time. The rain was coming down so hard that he couldn't see but a few feet in front of him, but he knew the way. The long, low building was at the very back of his father's property, and next to it were the acres of state-owned land of the wilderness preserve. The warehouse stored some of their family's oldest artifacts, including the yellow carriage that Colin thought should be in a museum. But when any of his sons said that, Peregrine Frazier said that the family kept what was theirs.

When Colin pulled up to the front door, he saw a light seeping out from under it. There were no windows in the building, and there were several security devices. Shamus knew all the codes-none of which would hinder Jean's uncle, Colin thought.

He parked up against the porch so he wouldn't have to fight the rain. When he saw that it was unlocked and the alarm was turned off, just to be on the safe side, he withdrew his firearm from the holster, held it at arm's length and went inside, quietly closing the door behind him.

26.

SHAMUS," GEMMA SAID, her voice heavy with sleep. "Why don't you do this tomorrow?"

He was sitting in the back of a big Conestoga wagon and sketching the little yellow carriage, which was a few feet away. "I couldn't sleep," he said, without looking up. "But you should go to bed."

"I can't leave you here alone. Your family is worried about you." She was sitting behind him in the wagon bed on a big piece of canvas.

"They're mad at Colin, not me."

"I know," Gemma said. "So am I. But the good news is that he's absolutely miserable." A noise made her look to the left to see Colin standing there and putting his gun back in the holster. "Speak of the devil . . . So, sheriff, what brings you out on this lovely morning?"

"My little brother. You're causing a fury."

Shamus glared at his brother. "Why have you been with Jean these last days?"

Colin glanced at Gemma. It looked like she hadn't told anyone about Jean's uncle. But then she wouldn't after he'd bawled her out for telling Tris too much.

Colin hoisted himself up onto the end of the wagon, beside Shamus, but a few feet from Gemma. The rain outside made it loud in the warehouse, and in spite of all the many overhead lights, the forms of the old wagons and carriages, all made by past Fraziers, created a ghostly air in the big, hollow building. Shamus loved it; Colin never had. He took a breath as he prepared to tell his brother the truth. "All the years I knew Jean, she was lying to me. She said she had no aunts, uncles, or cousins."

"That proves she's not from Edilean," Gemma said.

Shamus snorted.

"Her loss," Colin said. "Jean's late father has a brother who is an internationally notorious thief. He breaks into places like the U.S. Consulate in Romania and takes things."

"Like what?" Gemma had heard all this before, but her curiosity was taking over.

"Whatever anyone pays him to get. The man has no conscience, no morals. I got Jean to tell me the truth about her life, and the b.a.s.t.a.r.d's cleaned out her mother's accounts twice. He's either filthy rich or dest.i.tute."

"Did Jean tell you where he is?" Gemma asked.

"She says she hasn't seen him in years."

"You haven't found out that she lies all the time?" Shamus asked. He had his back to both of them and was still sketching.

"Yeah, I know that now," Colin said. "She certainly didn't tell me about her uncle."

"What does she lie about?" Gemma asked Shamus.

"She's not faithful to Colin," the young man said. "Never has been." There was anger in his voice.

"I know," Colin said softly to his brother. "I've found out more than I ever wanted to." When he looked at Gemma, there was longing in his eyes.

Turning, Shamus glanced at Gemma in question and she knew what he was asking. She shook her head. No, she hadn't told Colin about the baby and didn't want to do it now. "So you're saying that Jean kept secrets from you?" she asked with as much innocence as she could muster.

"Yeah," Colin said. "Just as I did to you."

Shamus gave a little guffaw of laughter. "Gemma's smarter than you are."

Colin grinned. "That wouldn't be too difficult." Thunder rolled around outside. "I really hate to break up this party, but I think we should all go home to bed. And you, little brother, are going to call our parents and tell them you're okay."

Shamus didn't move. "You made Gemma cry."

"I know," Colin said, "and I regret it. I thought it would be better if Jean's uncle heard that I'd broken up with Gemma. I was afraid . . . am still afraid that . . ." For a moment he looked at her and his eyes held hers. All that he felt-and feared-was there for her to see. "I won't do it again," he said, and there was promise in his voice.

Shamus flipped his drawing pad closed and got off the wagon.

Colin followed, and they stood at the end, both of them lifting their arms up to Gemma to help her down. She went to Shamus and he swung her down to stand beside him on the side away from Colin.

"How long will it be before you forgive me?" Colin asked.

"I have no idea," Gemma said. "Tris and I will talk about it."

When Colin groaned, Shamus grinned. "She should never let you off the hook," he said.

Colin took a breath. "I'll work hard to make that statement untrue," he said, looking at Gemma, then he lifted his head. "Little brother, I'm taking you home and after I make sure you call Mom and Dad and tell them you're sorry for worrying them, I'm taking Gemma to my house and I'm going to start begging. Pleading. Whatever I have to do to get her to forgive me."

Shamus nodded. "You should listen to her. She has a lot to tell you."

"And I want to hear every word," Colin said.

Gemma didn't dare look at Shamus for fear that her face would give away her secret. Whereas Colin was talking about one thing, she was sure Shamus was referring to the baby. As Gemma kept her eyes on Colin, she knew she wasn't going to easily get over her hurt. The things he'd said about her and Tris still rang in her head. There needed to be some big changes between them.

As for Gemma, she was going to have to give up some of her own independence. They needed to become a team, not two individuals who came together when their paths happened to cross.

Shamus and Colin were watching her, waiting for her reply.

Her eyes were on Colin's. "I think we need to do a great deal of talking."

"I agree," he said, and they left the warehouse.

27.

COLIN WAS WAITING for Gemma when she pulled into the carport of the guesthouse. As soon as they were inside, he turned to her.

"I made mistakes," he said. "I should have explained about Jean from the beginning. And I should have told her about you the day after I met you. I shouldn't have been jealous of you and Tristan. I shouldn't-"

He broke off because Gemma reached up and put her fingertips over his lips. "If it's going to work between us, I need to know what's going on. I need to know where I stand. I can't take spending a glorious day with you then the next knowing you're with Jean. I really need to know what I am to you."

Colin put his hand on the side of her face. "I love you," he said softly. "It's taken me a while to realize it, but I love you."

The pain of Colin's accusations was too fresh for Gemma to say the words back to him. Maybe it was because of her love of research, but she needed to hear facts. "I want to know what you've been doing. The town knows you've been with Jean, and I'm tired of the looks of pity."

"Fair enough," he said and they sat down on the couch together. Colin began the long story of everything he'd found out on his trip to D.C. and what he'd managed to get from Jean.

"I still don't know what the man is after," Colin said, "and Jean says she doesn't know."

The sun came up and they were still talking.

"You won't leave me out again?" Gemma asked.

"Never," Colin said as he kissed her.

They made love, sweetly and gently, and Colin told her how the thought of losing her had nearly driven him insane. "I've never felt this way before," he said. "All I can think of is that I want to talk to you, be with you. I've spent my life alone. Even when I'm with my family and through all the years I was with Jean, I felt that I was alone. But when I'm with you . . ."

"I know," she whispered, her head on his bare chest. "I feel the same way. I love you, Colin. I think I have since I saw you standing in the doorway. I don't know what I would have done if your mother hadn't given me the job."

"I would have gone after you."

She raised her head to look at him. "And leave your beloved Edilean? Ha!"

He stroked her hair and looked her in the eyes. "If you don't find a job here or you don't like this town, I'll go anywhere in the world you want to live."

She put her head down, smiling. This is what she'd wanted. She needed him to love her before she told him of their child she was carrying. She didn't want to go through life wondering if he was with her because he'd felt honor bound to stay with her.

"I need to tell you something," she said as she ran her hand over his bare chest.

He kissed her fingertips. "Anything."

"I-" She broke off because his cell phone rang, but Colin didn't reach for it. "Shouldn't you answer that? It might be important."

"I'd rather hear what you have to say."

"It'll hold," she said as the phone kept ringing.

Colin bent over the side of the bed and rummaged in his trousers to retrieve his cell phone. "It's Roy." He clicked the b.u.t.ton to hear her, listened, and said he'd be right there.

"It's one of the newcomers. Their fifteen-year-old daughter isn't in her bed."

"Go!" Gemma said, pulling the sheet around her as she sat up. "Right now. Go find the child."

"You and I . . ."

"Can wait," she said as she reached out and put her hand on his shoulder.

He kissed the palm. "Do you know that I love you?" he asked softly.

"I think I realized it when I saw how unhappy you were in that sandwich shop."

He was still holding her hand. "And you?"

"Yes," she said simply. "I do love you."

"Me too," he said as he bent to kiss her.

But Gemma pulled away. "We still need to talk about Tris and every other man in my life, in the future and the present. I don't like jealousy."

"It's a new emotion to me. Never felt it before," he said.

"Not even with Jean?"

"Most certainly not," Colin said. He started to kiss her, but his phone went off again, this time with a ring that sounded like blaring trumpets.

Gemma drew back from him.

He looked at his phone. "It's Roy again and she's already there. I better go." He pulled her to him. "Gemma, I love you. You're what I've wanted in a woman for as long as I can remember. Will you think I'm crazy if I say that I feel that I've been waiting for you?"

"No," she whispered, so very glad to yet again be in his arms. "I know exactly what you mean."

"I think I needed Jean to . . . to occupy myself until you showed up." He kissed her forehead. "I wished for True Love and I found it." Again his phone went off, this time with car horns blowing. "It's Dad."

"You must go," she said. "We can talk more later."

He kissed her with all the longing he felt. "I love you. Don't forget that."

"I won't," she said, then he got into his Jeep and left.

Gemma watched him drive away, then locked the door behind her. When she was in school, she'd often stayed up all night to study. But now that she was pregnant, she seemed to need twelve hours a night. Earlier, she'd only just fallen asleep when Mrs. Frazier rang her to ask if she knew where Shamus was. Gemma had checked to make sure the boy wasn't sleeping on her couch, then told Mrs. Frazier that she didn't know where he was.

Gemma had tried to go back to sleep, but between the noise of the storm and worry, she couldn't. After about an hour she gave up, got dressed, and used one of the little trucks that always seemed to be nearby and drove to the big warehouse at the back of the property. She hadn't been surprised to see young Shamus inside, drawing the carriages his ancestors had made.

It was just minutes later that Colin showed up. So now it was hours later, and all she could think about was sleep. Ah, pregnancy, she thought as she fell across her bed and was asleep instantly.

When she awoke it was 6 P.M. She'd slept the entire day away! Groggily, she got up and picked up her phone. She had four e-mails and six text messages. Her adviser had approved her topic of women in medicine in Virginia in 1840, and a professor knew some people at William and Mary.

"Good," Gemma said, smiling as she went into the kitchen. She wanted to eat everything that was in it.