Fantasyland: Midnight Soul - novelonlinefull.com
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"I hope you don't mind me saying..." she began and my eyes went to hers.
She was casting a quick peek at the footman and I waited as patiently as I could for her to continue.
Finally, she seemed to feel safe in turning her attention to me but when she spoke again, her voice had lowered.
"My husband has shared with me much of his history."
I put down my fork, reached again to my coffee cup and held it aloft, keeping my gaze locked to hers. I nodded once, slowly, an indication for her to go on.
She did so.
"When I say much, what I mean is all of it," she clarified.
"You are his wife," I stated carefully. "This comes as no surprise."
"In doing so," she sallied forth swiftly, still speaking low but now doing it like she wished she wasn't, "he of course had to share about you."
"Of course," I agreed.
She licked her lips and pressed them together.
I took a sip of coffee, giving her time.
"I...it's not my place," she eventually carried on.
"What isn't your place?" I inquired when she didn't explain.
"To say what I wish to say," she finished.
I drew in breath and put my cup in its saucer. Once I'd done that, I folded my hands in my lap and straightened my shoulders minutely in hopes she wouldn't see this effort at bracing for what I suspected she felt was not her place to say was that now, as her husband had started to blossom out from under the oppression of oppressive parents, she felt secure enough to do the same.
But her oppression had come at my hands.
And therefore now she felt it was time to share a few choice things with me about how I'd treated her, and even Kristian, not the least of which was dragging my brother into my treachery, in doing so putting him, her and their son at risk.
Things I'd not only earned having to hear but I deserved.
I would not relish it, of that I was certain.
But I deserved it.
When she didn't speak further, I felt it was my place to invite her to do so.
This I did.
"I have not treated you thus, Brikitta, and there were reasons for this that may at this juncture seem feeble and still cruel so I'll not insult you by attempting to explain them, but in the end you are my sister. The sister my brother chose to add to our family when he fell in love with you. I'm sure I don't have to remind you that in the past I've not hesitated in saying a great many things to you, most of them unwelcome. I'm sure you've sensed much has changed in the last weeks. Thus I'd like to encourage you at this time to return that favor, no matter what you wish to say. All I can say at this time to rea.s.sure you is that you have my vow no matter what you say, there will be no ramifications, to you or my brother."
She stared at me, her eyes widened, her lips parted in astonishment.
She did this but she did not snap out of it and say what she wished to say.
Therefore I added, "In other words, Brikitta, you are my sister. You are my family. And thus it's absolutely your place to say whatever is on your mind."
"Thank you," she whispered.
I shook my head. "You don't need to thank me for sharing that you're free to speak your mind."
"No, what I wished to say that I didn't think was my place to say was...thank you."
I stared at her, puzzled.
"Pardon?" I asked.
"You...I love my husband," she stated.
"This I know," I told her.
"And you kept him safe. For years, you kept him safe. Thank you."
Suddenly, it was me turning my eyes away. Indeed, I turned my whole head away, giving her my profile. And for no reason, I lifted my napkin to touch it to my lips as I fought for composure.
"Franka," she called softly.
"A moment if you don't mind," I replied, and d.a.m.n it all, my voice was thick.
"Certainly," she murmured.
I drew in breath, put the napkin to my lap and again faced my sister-in-law.
The instant I caught her eyes, I saw hers were not timid or frightened. They were bright with emotion, undoubtedly just like mine.
"That is done. We move on from here, yes?" she asked, her tone also quite husky.
I nodded, not trusting my voice not to give me away.
"Good," she said and carefully cleared her throat.
I again took up my fork and used it to slice into a fat, juicy sausage.
"I also would like to extend my invitation for you to journey back and stay with us at our aateliskartono," she said. "Kristian is right, we have much room and I think he'll quite enjoy his sister close for a while. Not to mention, watching you get to know your nephew better."
I had never much thought of children except the fact that I never intended to have any. I had not had good examples of parenting and the very thought of being in that position (I did not admit to myself but it was true) terrified me.
But one could definitely say that Timofei was the handsomest child I'd ever laid my eyes on, and from what little I'd noted, he was exceptionally bright, and I was certain that was not a prejudiced a.s.sessment in the slightest.
"I would enjoy both," I told her. "With the addition of spending time getting to know my sister better."
She flushed at my words and then awarded me the first smile I think she'd ever given me, except the one she gave upon meeting me, something to which I said something foul that wiped it clean from her face.
I curved my lips up in return.
"My two favorite girls in the world at the breakfast table together," Kristian declared, and I twisted in my seat to watch him walk in. "This heralds the beginning of an excellent day."
He was late for reasons unknown.
Until then.
He'd orchestrated what just occurred, perhaps at Brikitta's behest, perhaps for his own ends.
And there it was.
It would seem my brother was also blossoming in the art of intrigue.
"Good morning, brother," I greeted.
"Sister," he greeted back, smiling brightly at me and stopping at my seat to bend and sweep his lips along my cheekbone.
When he straightened and moved toward his wife, his smile changed a nuance as he said, "My wife."
"My husband," she replied.
He arrived by her seat and she tipped her head back for him to touch his lips to hers. He lifted but an inch away and they shared a look that made me cast my eyes from them for it was intimate and not for me to see even if it was across a breakfast table.
But in witnessing it, abruptly I felt much like Kristian had explained he felt when he heard what had become of our mother and father.
He had Brikitta. Someone who loved him. Who gave him children. Who made him smile and laugh. Who clearly fretted for his safety and had the courage to thank a woman who had not once been kind to her because she made that husband safe. And she was a woman who gave him that intimacy it was clear he not only savored but cherished.
The feeling all that gave me was as if a weight had been lifted and I could struggle to my feet, and perhaps not fly, but be free to allow my feet to take me wherever they wished to take me.
Not to mention, I'd never thought my sister-in-law attractive, but at what I'd beheld, I changed my mind.
Love created beauty, it would seem.
Following these thoughts, I also realized with some discomfort that I'd never had that with Antoine. There was intimacy, of course, and affection. He knew me well, better than I knew myself, it was true. We shared many moments of humor and also moments of quiet togetherness that I treasured.
But he was my kept lover.
He'd never been my partner.
I'd never had that. Not from Antoine, not from anyone.
But I was pleased I could go forward with my future plans content my brother did.
"So, I hope you'll remain with us even if you've finished your breakfast, my love," Kristian said, and I turned back to them to see him sitting at the foot of the table, his wife to his right, me to his left, his eyes on his beloved.
He had his napkin in his lap and the footman was pouring his coffee.
"For a spell, Kristian," Brikitta replied to his request. "Then I'd like to get to Timofei."
"Of course, darling," Kristian murmured, smiling at her fondly then turning that look to me. "I ran into your Noc in the pa.s.sageway on the way here."
I felt my breath turn shallow simply at the mention of his name but also at the way my brother referred to him as "your Noc."
"He's hardly my Noc, brother," I returned.
"Hmm..." Kristian mumbled noncommittally and again gave his attention to his wife. "He'd just returned from being outside, running. Odd that. Out in the snow wearing curious shoes that I must admit look rather comfortable, the most peculiar loose-fitting pants and a sweater made of fleece material that appeared rather warm. But along with all that, he was running, of his own accord just to do so, out in the cold. He was breathing heavily because of it but seemed rather invigorated." He shook his head in bewilderment. "Such an unusual thing to do."
Naturally, both Brikitta and Kristian had been fully informed about the parallel universe-save Princess Finnie not being the real one, and Princess Cora not being the real one either, the same with Queen Circe, those were regarded as state secrets.
"Most unusual," Brikitta agreed.
I said nothing, trying to visualize Noc's attire and what he looked like "invigorated."
I'd seen him "invigorated" once before, so just as swiftly as I tried to visualize this, I attempted to banish such thoughts from my brain (and failed).
"He shared with me his plan to take you back to his world after Brikitta safely delivers, and I wholeheartedly agreed."
My mind was wiped of visions of Noc in loose-fitting pants looking invigorated and my eyes cut to my brother at his words.
"I beg your pardon?"
Kristian didn't repeat himself.
He declared, "We decided that's what you'll do. Return with us lvkyla. Once the baby comes, Master Noc will have concluded his explorations in our world and you'll return with him to the other world. An excellent idea. We spent not much time with that world's witch, but even in the short time we spent with her, she seemed most capable, and it was shared she'd be your champion. Not to mention, Master Noc shared he'd look after you and he may not be a prince in his world, but he still has a princely bearing. Thus I'm confident you'll be safe with him and the witch."
Although I'd been leaning toward the same decision, I found Noc's sharing with my brother and my brother's declaration more than a little vexing.
"I'm sure I don't have to remind you that where I go next is my decision to make, Kristian," I informed him tartly.
"It's lost on no one that you've grown quite close with this man and he does not hide the fact that he holds great affection for you, Franka," Kristian returned. "He'll have your best interests at heart and seems to trust this witch. If you desire a complete change of scenery, this is much preferable to your other plans. Further, Master Noc informed me that you can return when you please for but a few gold coins and in but moments, not months."
"I've not spoken to this witch so I'm actually not aware of what the cost of travel would be," I retorted.
Though, that said, I undoubtedly had whatever the cost even if it was extravagant.
And this reminded me I had yet to speak to my brother about that as well for I intended to give him a healthy portion of what I had.
That would happen, of course, but at that juncture I wasn't feeling the need to share my intended generosity.
Kristian pushed his chair back and began to move to the buffet, stating, "We'll talk more of it later. Brikitta wishes to get to our boy and I wish to join them. He had a fitful night. Perhaps later we'll all sledge into Fyngaard and get Timofei some liquid chocolate." He gave his wife a tender look. "And my Brikitta as well as you so love the chocolate from Esmerelda's."
"I would enjoy that, Kristian," Brikitta agreed.
"Then it's sorted," Kristian decided and scooped up eggs.
"Well, if you both will excuse me," I announced, pushing my own chair back, having not finished my breakfast, not caring but instead standing, "I have some fuming to do and I'd prefer to do that alone."
Brikitta grinned down at her plate.