De Mortuis Nil Nisi Bona Part 13

Sed si bona reliquit in sermonem hominum semper venit; But if he left property, people always talk about him; vitia operta sunt; his faults are concealed; pecuniam fecit, illa quidem "non olet."

he made money, and it "doesn't smell".

Quem heredem inst.i.tuit?

Whom did he name as heir?

Extraneis haec omnia livori proxima videntur.

To outsiders all these seem next door to envy.

Te autem si tu aut cognatione aut affinitate propinquus exspectatio tenet.

But you--if you are close, either by acquaintance or relationship, expectation grips you.

An mea interest? Si sic habet, quanti?

But does it concern me? If that's how it is, how much?

Suave est ex magno tollere acervo; It's pleasant to receive a big heap; ejus pecunia quid non facere possim?

with his money, what couldn't I do?

Siste, amice; aliquantulum cogita; Stop, friend; think a little; supersunt multi cognati; there remain many friends; fieri potest ut aut c.u.m aliis bona partire debeas, aut exheredatus sis.

it may be that either you have to share the goods with others, or you are disinherited.

Gerrae! Sine dubio testamentum fecit: Nonsense! Without a doubt he made a will: et c.u.m ratione constat me alicuius rei legatarium esse.

and it's reasonable to think I was left something.

Nemo enim magis eum fovit; For n.o.body took better care of him; alii omnes cognati a.s.seclae; solus eum amavi.

all his other friends only cared about his money; I alone loved him.

Insipiens, inter os et offam multa intervenire possunt.

O fool, many things can come "between the mouth and the morsel"

[Latin idiom, like "many a slip between cup and lip"?]

Audi de gente Fulvia fabellam: I've heard the story of the Fulvian people: de multis mutato nomine narratur.

it is told of many, with the name changed.

(In scena est coenatio Georgii Fusci, argentariorum interpretis.

(Setting: The dining room of George Black, a.s.sayer of money.

Fuscus, bene coenatus, alterum cyathum Falerni sorbillat.

Black, having dined well, is enjoying his second gla.s.s of port.

Accurrit uxor, commota; His wife runs in, excited; in manu litteras resignatas tenet).

in her hand she holds a signed paper.)

U. Georgi!

George!

F. Quid tibi nunc est? Num quid novi est?

What's the matter with you? What's happening?

U. Amita mea Maria decessit!

My aunt Mary has died!

F. Bene! nunquam postea illud vile Sabinum necesse erit obsorbere: Good! I will never again have to drink her vile claret: magnum est solatium.

that's a great solace.

U. At tu Georgi semper id laudasti!

But George, you always praised it!

F. Et tu simul filiaeque semper miratae estis Persicam illam detestabilem And you and your daughter always admired that detestable Persian et psittac.u.m dissonum, et laudibus extulistis: and the raucous parrot, and sang their praises: pretium fuit vetulae placere.

that's the cost of pleasing old women.

U. Esto: illa vero suavia erant.

Never mind: They were really agreeable.

At hic mihi litterae a cognitore ejus Semaureo allatae: But this letter was sent to me by her solicitor [Semaureus]: dicit se hodie vesperi te conventurum.

he says he is coming to [see] you this evening.

F. Demiror si testamentum fecit!

I'll be amazed if she made a will!

Sin minus omnia ad te perveniunt, If not, everything goes to you; tu heres ex a.s.se; you are the [default/intestate] heir; cognati alii desunt.

there are no other relatives

U. Est quidem mariti nepos iste.

There's that nephew of her husband.

F. Nullus: tu sola heres: That's nothing: you alone are the heir: si intestata omnia ad te.

if she [died] intestate, everything goes to you.

U. Tabulas vere fecit: She really made an accounting: cognitor scribit se te conventurum quia her solicitor writes that he is coming to you because testamentum ad rem tuam maxime pertinet.

her will greatly concerns your business.

F. Mihi crede igitur!

Then believe me!

Aliquid magni tibi legavit: She left you something big: haud verisimile illam quidquam juveni Albo lega.s.se: it's hardly likely that she left anything to young White: nunquam illam observavit; he never paid any attention to her; h.o.m.o nil est nisi pictor ignotus aut aliquid simile: he is n.o.body except an unknown painter or something like that: uxorem quoque duxit quamdam inopem, he also married some penniless woman, et eis saepe amita tua subvenire debuit.

and your aunt always had to come to their a.s.sistance.

U. Fores pulsantur: advenit cognitor!

There's a knock at the door: her solicitor has arrived!

F. Dic famulae ut alteram cyathum ponat.

Tell the maid to bring another gla.s.s.

(Ingreditur Dominus Semaureus.) (Enter Mr [Semaureus].)

Quid agis vir doctissime?

How are you, my esteemed friend?

Mea uxor dixit te venturum; My wife said you were coming; nonne ob testamentum amitae ejus?

is it about the will of her aunt?

S. Sic res habet, Fusce; That's how it is, Black; venio ad te quod hoc res tua maxime refert; I come to you because this concerns you greatly; et scio te onus suscepturum.

and I know you will take up the burden.

F. An sic habet?

Is that how it is?

Vetulae illi multa bona provenere ut opinor.

The old lady left a large property, I think.