Dark Series - Dark Guardian Part 18

"Well, what do you expect when you stand there looking all intimidating and scary like a Mafia enforcer or a hit man or something? You need to look more...

I don't know, more something."

"Foppish?" he supplied softly, a hint of compa.s.sion escaping into his voice.

"What kind of word is foppish? Antonio, have you ever heard of foppish?"

"Antonio cannot hear us," Lucian pointed out.

Jaxon was busy stabbing at various b.u.t.tons. "Which one of these things makes it so he can? You use mind control so easily, Lucian. Are you controlling me, too?"

Very gently Lucian laid a hand over hers to still her frantic fingers. "Be calm, Jaxon. You are suffering needlessly. I do not control your mind. If I did so, you would not be placing yourself in danger at every opportunity. Believe it or not, I am working at finding a balance with your nature. Carpathian males are not easy with other men around their women. That is a simple fact. There is no need to fear what is natural. My emotions are new and raw, but I would never harm you or someone you care for."

"Well, I am not Carpathian, so you'll just have to get used to it," she muttered rebelliously. "And I'm not afraid of you." In the close confines of the car, with his hand covering hers, his thumb sliding back and forth in a caress over her wrist, it was difficult to think of anything but Lucian. "I'm a cop. Those men are my partners. We watch each other's backs. It's how I live, how we all survive."

In spite of her determination not to, she found herself explaining.

"I knew there was a reason I did not want you to continue in your chosen profession," Lucian said without expression. He leaned down to her, his palm finding her chin to force her head up. "I do not like to see you in danger. It is more than my heart can stand. Add your sorrow and the guilt you heap upon yourself, and my heart knows what it feels like to break. If another man, human or not, decides to look upon you with desire and then places his hands on you, I have a wish to lose my control for just a few minutes."

Jaxon found herself managing a small smile at his complete sincerity. "Did you make Tom think I looked like a wrinkled old crone or something?"

"It was a temptation." His hand slipped to the nape of her neck and found several tendrils of hair to caress. "I had a primitive urge to discourage him from coveting you."

She blinked up at him suspiciously. "I don't want to know what you mean, so don't bother to explain."

A slow smile warmed the black ice of his eyes. "You are beginning to know me."

"Thank you for saving Barry. The glimpse I caught of him, he looked to be in bad shape. I know it must have been difficult destroying the ghoul there, helping me, and working on him all at the same time." She could feel his exhaustion. It didn't show on his face, but it was in his mind. He was extremely tired. He had used tremendous energy tonight. Even someone as powerful as Lucian could get tired.

She was certain she was tired, too, but it manifested itself more as sorrow. It was almost too much to comprehend the loss of so many of the people she knew and cared about. For a moment the reality of it all touched her mind, and she couldn't breathe, her lungs refusing to work properly. "If the man at the apartments wasn't Drake, and the one at the station house wasn't him either, who were they, and how did they know exactly what Drake did to his victims? How would they know whom to kill? And why would they even want to kill them, Lucian?"

"There is only one answer, angel." Lucian's voice was more expressionless than ever. It made Jaxon glance up at him in apprehension. "There must be a vampire involved here, a master vampire, one of the ancients. It is a creature capable of such things."

"It has Drake? Is he dead?" There was almost a hopeful note in her voice.

Lucian shook his head. "More than likely Drake is still out there somewhere, probably puzzled by these murders. The vampire has read your mind, picked the details out of your head, and that is why you knew something was wrong. The details were not exactly Drake. The vampire created his ghouls and sent them out with orders to kill whoever had fond memories of you."

Jaxon's fingers twisted together, and her stomach burned, a hard knot of pain. "Why? What would he accomplish?"

Lucian's black gaze moved over her, fathomless, moody, possessive.

"Precisely what he did. Pain. Vampires thrive on other people's pain. He must have caught you out in the open, away from the protected property, and read your memories. He could not have hidden his taint of power from me had I been close."

Jaxon felt as if he had punched her hard in the pit of her stomach. The feeling was so real, she actually hunched over, dropping her head into the heel of one hand. "So I did this. Just by going out of the house, I caused all this to happen.

Basically that's what you're saying, isn't it?"

Lucian's arm slid around her slender shoulders. Her pain was radiating from her, enveloping him so that he felt almost as sick as she did. "Of course not, Jaxon. You cannot ever think you are responsible for the sick actions of others."

Jaxon ducked out from under his arm, unable to bear the contact. She was struggling just to breathe. "Lucian, have Antonio stop the car right now. I need to get out. I'll walk the rest of the way. It isn't that far."

"It is almost dawn, my love." He said the words softly, without inflection, apparently neither for nor against her decision.

"I can't breathe in here, Lucian. Stop the car." She wanted to run as fast as she could-whether from herself or from everything that had happened this night, she didn't know. She knew only that she had to be out in the open. "I need to be alone. Please just stop the car and let me walk by myself back to the house. I have to be alone."

Lucian's black gaze moved over her face once more, brooding, suspicious.

His mind moved in hers. He read Jaxon's need to alone, to be in the fresh air, to be able to breathe freely. There was such chaos in her mind, she was having trouble breathing.

At once the car rolled to a stop, and Jaxon realized Lucian had commanded Antonio to come to a halt. Instantly she was out of the car and running, leaving the asphalt behind, taking to the open meadow leading to the hills and the south side of the estate. She ran parallel to the road until the car went around a bend and disappeared from sight. Instantly she switched directions and ran up the hill, away from the house and toward the bluffs. Twice she had to stop, leaning over as her body protested the terrible crimes committed simply because someone knew her. What was she? A monster magnet? Some hideous thing inside her drew out the demon in others. She didn't pay the price; some innocent bystander always did.

Jaxon had heard the conversations throughout the apartment building and in the squad room. The murmurs, the silent condemnation. Most of her friends were afraid to speak to her, none of them wanted to be seen with her, and all of them were terrified for their families, and rightly so. This latest carnage was worse than anything Drake had ever done before. This vampire was capable of ma.s.s killing in two places at one time.

She continued running as fast as she could. As the trail became steeper, she stumbled occasionally, tears streaming down her face, clouding her vision. Jaxon had no clear thought in her head; she really didn't know what she was going to do. Only that this killing couldn't continue any longer. Her father. Her mother.

Her beloved little Mathew. The entire Andrews family, even poor Sabrina, just home from college on a break. Then her neighbor, Carol. Sweet Carol's big crime was watching the sunrise every morning, and she died because she enjoyed sharing the experience with her neighbor. And now all these other innocent victims.

She was sobbing as she clawed her way up the steep rock to the top of the bluff. Just as she pulled herself up, the earth rolled and bucked beneath her feet like a roller coaster. Overhead black clouds swirled and roiled, boiling like a cauldron. Lightning arced from cloud to cloud, slamming to earth in white-hot jagged bolts, the thunder nearly deafening her. She screamed as she ran for the cliff's edge. If there was no Jaxon, there would be no need for Drake to kill anyone ever again.

She tried to run with the earth rocking beneath her feet, hurtling her body toward the edge. Just as her lead foot stepped off into empty s.p.a.ce, a thick arm caught her around her waist and lifted her completely off the ground. "Lucian."

She whispered his name, clung to him, her only sanity in the madness of the world. Her slender arms circled his neck, and she buried her face in the comfort of his shoulder.

His body was trembling; she could feel it. She lifted her head and saw stark terror burning in the depths of his eyes. He lowered his head and took possession of her mouth even as the heavens opened above them and poured rain onto the earth.

"I need you, Jaxon." Each word was enunciated softly. "You cannot leave me alone in this world. I need you." Whips of lightning sizzled and danced all around them. Thunder cracked and boomed. "You cannot leave me alone."

"I know, I know," she whispered back, pressing closer, an offering in the midst of the world crashing down around them. "I don't know what happened, what I was thinking. I'm sorry, Lucian. I'm sorry."

"You do not have to say that. Never say that." His mouth was moving over hers again, hot and needy with fear and rising desire. "I have to know you are here with me."

"I am here. I won't leave you. It isn't you." She was crying, her hands sliding under his shirt to touch the solid reality of him. He was real, and he was her only comfort, her only sanity. She had hurt him; she felt it radiating from him, deep and intense, along with the terror gripping his soul. She lifted her head to meet him kiss for kiss, giving herself to him, wanting only to comfort and be comforted.

Lucian was consuming her, devouring her, his mouth everywhere, the rain on her bare skin, on their bare skin. He had removed their clothing so quickly, so easily, with a mere impatient thought in his mind.

It took Jaxon a few moments to realize he was enraged, the terrible ferocity of the storm reflecting the blackness of his mood. But his enormously strong arms held her with such gentleness, it turned her heart over. "I need you with me, angel. You still do not see, no matter how often I try to tell you, to show you."

All around them the earth moved and split, great gaping cracks in the rocks.

"Without you I have no reason to live. I need you. Really need you. Put your legs around my waist." He whispered the command to her even as his teeth were sc.r.a.ping over her frantic pulse. "Right now, Jaxon, I need you, need to be inside you, need you surrounding me with your heat and light. I need to feel you are safe and alive and nothing can harm you."

He was everywhere, his hands exploring, inflaming, his body so hard and aggressive, taut with terrible need, terrible hunger, that Jaxon obeyed him almost blindly. His hunger was intense, the storm increasing rather than waning, a true barometer of his urgent desire.

"You cannot leave me alone to live in an empty world with no light or laughter. You cannot leave me alone."

His voice was raw, his beautiful voice raw with his fear and relentless hunger for her alone. His hair was soaked, the thick ebony strands hanging down his back. He looked wild and untamed. He looked what he was: dangerous and unpredictable. Yet Jaxon wasn't afraid. She clung to him, needing him with the same urgency, wanting only to feel the strength of his arms, of his possession, his body moving in hers, his mouth feeding at her breast, his soul anchoring hers in this chaos.

Her legs slipped around his waist, and she eased her body over the hard length of him. He filled her instantly, making her gasp with the unexpected pleasure. The storm intensified, lightning slashing through the gray sky. The sun tried valiantly to rise, but the ominous, swirling black clouds were thick and dark, preventing the light from penetrating to their sensitive skin. Still, Jaxon felt the first p.r.i.c.kling of unease at the muted light. Tears were streaming down her face, her eyes burning, her lungs gasping for air from the strangling sobs wracking her as they clung to each other in a wild tango of life-affirming love.

His arms were like steel, holding her safe, his body moving aggressively in hers, yet he was so heartbreakingly tender, his mouth warm and loving on her skin. "Stop crying, angel. You have to stop now," he whispered against her rain- soaked hair. "We can get through anything as long we are together. I cannot ever be without you. You are the air I breathe. You are in my soul, my heart. Look into my mind, into my memories, see my life, empty and endless without you.

You could never contemplate such a thing if you knew the way I needed you. I cannot be alone again."

"I didn't know what I was doing," she denied.

He believed her. Her mind had been so chaotic, so filled with sorrow that she was running blindly, without real thought. Not once had she been thinking about destroying what she had become. Her thoughts had been centered solely on the tragedy. He found he could take a real breath, forcing air into his lungs, allowing his heart to beat once more. "You will never do such a thing again." His hips were moving in a rhythm to match the ferocity of the storm.

Jaxon found her tears slowing as fire spread through her body, spread through his. Flames leaped higher and higher, reaching toward the heavens, reaching into the clouds above them so the jagged bolts of lightning danced with them, through them. She heard her cries blend with his as they exploded together, clinging to each other like two frightened children as their hearts and lungs worked frantically to keep pace with their soaring bodies.

Jaxon lay against him, huddling as close to him as possible for comfort, unable to control the storm of tears any more than she had been able to control the firestorm of need sweeping through both of them. She felt his body tremble, shudder, and his arms clasped her more tightly than ever. She felt his tears in his mind, the agony of fear, the mounting terror as he realized what she had nearly done.

Then it was Jaxon providing comfort to Lucian, framing his head in her hands, covering his face with kisses. "I didn't mean to do such a foolish thing, Lucian. It wasn't because of you or what I am. I wasn't thinking properly. It had nothing to do with us. I just couldn't bear bringing so much death to so many families."

"Jaxon, Jaxon," he said softly, his pain tearing at her. "What am I going to do with you? And how many times must I remind you that you are not the one responsible for these deaths? You do things so impetuously, without thought.

You think to throw away such a beautiful, important life, even though you would not have died had you gone over the cliff."

She blinked up at him. "What do you mean?"

"Had I not caught you or merged with you to float you down or stopped you in some other way than I did, had you really gone over and your body hit bottom, you would have suffered terribly with broken bones and internal injuries, but your body would not permit your death any more than mine would. Our people often sustain mortal injuries, but the earth heals us quickly."

She pressed her face against his chest, unwilling to talk about it anymore. It was too difficult to a.s.similate the information he was giving her with her mind in such chaos. Only then did she realize that her skin was beginning to tingle in spite of the fierce storm blanketing the area and dulling the effects of the rising sun. And the burning in her eyes was increasing with each pa.s.sing second. She put a hand over her eyes as he allowed her feet to touch the ground. It felt as if a thousand needles were brushing at her eyes with murderous tips. She bit down hard on her lower lip and burrowed her face closer against his chest. "Lucian, about that speed thing you like to do? Now would be a perfect time."

Lucian could also feel the effects of the sun on his skin despite the dark clouds veiling the sun. Scooping Jaxon into his arms, he moved with his preternatural speed so that s.p.a.ce swirled around them and the rain lashed at the empty air left in their wake. Lucian entered the house from the second-story balcony and kept his hold on Jaxon until he had glided through the house to the lower chamber, where the sun's rays could not possibly reach them. Only then did he allow the storm to begin to subside.

"What are we going to do?" Jaxon asked. "How can we stop all these deaths?" She looked around the room for a robe.

Lucian handed her one, easily reading her mind. He picked it out of the air while Jaxon was blinking up at him with her large, trusting eyes. She slipped her arms into the thick cotton and pulled the lapels together. Her eyes remained steadily on his face. You could use a robe, too. He shook his head at her modesty but obligingly fashioned another robe, one far larger and longer, just to please her. He could see that she relaxed once his body was covered. He had to turn away from her to hide his smile. Jaxon was pacing back and forth across the floor, unable to be still with all the adrenaline pumping through her. "Tell me what we're going to do, Lucian. How do we stop this monster from killing everyone I care about?"

"We have two choices," he said softly, his voice forever tranquil, helping to calm the overload of nervous energy coursing through her veins. "We can stay here and attempt to draw out the vampire. It will not be easy. He is old and knows who I am. He will send his ghouls and other dark creatures to fight us before he shows himself. And he will expose himself only if he believes the advantages are his and very great."

Jaxon shoved a hand through her wet hair, found her hand was trembling, and hastily placed it behind her back. Twisting her fingers tightly together, she did her best to look composed. "And the other choice?"

"We can leave this city. Go far away and hope our enemies follow us, drawing them away from your innocent friends. I believe Tyler Drake will come after us. It is possible the vampire will, also. There are very few human women like you. He will not want to wait to try to find another. It is possible he was already on your trail when I found you and believes I have unfairly taken you from him. If that is the case, he will follow us."

"If he doesn't, we leave everyone unprotected." Jaxon sounded forlorn. "I don't understand, Lucian. What is in me that attracts such monsters to me?" She turned to look at him, unaware of the raw pain in the depths of her eyes.

Lucian met her gaze squarely, steadily. He was a monster. A dark monster that had lived for more centuries than even most of his kind. He had committed crimes, was responsible for countless deaths. He had searched the world over for her, he would never allow her to escape him, never give her up, never let any other take her from him. What was the difference between him and the others who so desperately wanted her? Is that how she saw him? As a monster?

Jaxon threw her arms around him and held him close to her. "You are not a monster, Lucian. You are kind and honorable and a good man. Don't even put yourself in the same category with someone like Tyler Drake or that evil thing you call a vampire."

He bent his head over her, holding her tightly to him. She didn't know him as well as she thought she did. He held so much power, he had been named monster many times over the centuries. Jaxon had read his mind. It amazed him that she had done so and not even noticed. She made him believe his soul was not d.a.m.ned for all eternity, that his deeds would be judged with compa.s.sion.

She made him believe in miracles.

He whispered to her that he loved her, using the ancient language. He whispered to her in his mind, unable to say the words aloud and have her turn away from him. His hands moved through her hair possessively. "I have learned the meaning of the word fear, angel. It was no easy lesson and one I do not ever wish to repeat, but it has given me a small glimpse of the h.e.l.l you have endured in your young life. Choose, Jaxon. Do we leave a trail for the vampire to follow?

Lure him away from your friends? Or do we stay and fight here?" He was asking her opinion. Jaxon blinked back tears. It was true she didn't know him all that well, but she caught glimpses of his mind each time he merged fully with her, and she had seen enough to know he was a master at planning battles. Most of all, it mattered that he would ask her opinion.

She thought carefully about each plan of action. "I think it's too hard to protect everyone. We can't be with them during the day, so they're vulnerable to Drake and any creature the vampire decides to create. If we go, I don't see what good it will do for the vampire to attack people here. We should think of a place we can lay out an ambush and easily defend." She suddenly noticed she was shivering uncontrollably, her hair soaking wet, while he was standing there perfectly groomed in his robe. She glared up at him. "Why are you dry and I'm soaking wet and shaking with cold?"

Lucian took her hands in his and rubbed them gently to warm her. A faint smile touched his sculpted mouth. "Think of being warm and dry. Picture it in your mind. Hold the picture in your mind of your hair dry, your skin dry, your body warm." He merged with her, stilling her tumbling thoughts, helping to build the image of warmth and dryness.

Jaxon withdrew her hand from his to reach up and touch her hair in awe. "I did that? Just like that? No blow-dryer, no towel?"

"Just like that." The smile was once more inside him, blossoming strong, filling him with joy. She brought back his first days as a fledgling trying to learn the things that came so easily to the adults of their species.

"Can I do all the things you can do?"

He nodded slowly, watching her face through half-closed eyes. He looked lazy, yet Jaxon had the feeling he was totally alert.

"What would you like to learn how to do?" he asked.

"Now?" She ran her palms along her arms, aware of the way her skin had resisted the rising sun.

"Your skin will become tougher, Jaxon. Eventually you will be able to watch the sunrise as long as you wear dark gla.s.ses. You should make it a habit to carry them with you wherever you go. That way if you are caught out in the morning or need to rise early, your eyes will be safe from the rays of the sun. I am an ancient-we feel pain much more intensely than do the younger members of our species-yet I can go out in the early-morning hours with little trouble. It is one advantage the hunter has over the vampire. The vampire cannot rise until the sun has truly set. He cannot see the sunrise ever."

"Are we really helpless in the afternoon?" A soft note in her voice betrayed her fear.

His hand found her silky hair, then slipped to the nape of her neck, his fingers slowly ma.s.saging to ease the sudden tension from her. "Our bodies are lethargic at that time, it is true, but we are not entirely without means to protect ourselves.

I am extremely powerful, angel; there is no way you will come to any harm. I would never allow it."

Jaxon moved into his arms, holding him tightly. Staying a shadow in her mind allowed him to see how his world, so alien and different, so filled with myths and superst.i.tions, with violence and creatures of the night, seemed a very terrifying place to her. Lucian locked his arms around her. "Should we ever have need of help, Jaxon, my brother is always near."

"I hate to disillusion you, Lucian, but your brother lives in Paris. I saw his address. That isn't just around the corner, even by your standards."

"If your need was great, he could do as I did from afar, seeing through your eyes-lend you his aid, his strength, even destroy an enemy threatening you."

The thought of any other man crawling around in her mind was instantly abhorrent to her. Why she didn't mind Lucian reading her every thought, why it seemed natural, she didn't comprehend, but she knew she would be reluctant to have anyone else discover the things about her he had.

Lucian was absurdly pleased with her thoughts. She was normally so easy in the company of men, which bothered him more than he had realized. He wanted her to want him, need him, the same way he needed her. Not because the ritual had joined them together and their bodies cried out to each other, but because he was important to her. Lucian. No other. Still, she was reluctant to read his mind, explore his memories or the person he was. Lifemates learned about each other quickly by exploring each other's minds, yet she persisted in shying away from such things.

"You look sad." She put a hand on his arm and touched his mouth with a fingertip. "Your eyes, Lucian. Sometimes you look so sad, it breaks my heart. I know you must find me a great disappointment because I can't do the things the women of your race have always done, but I'm trying. I really am."

"You could never disappoint me, angel. Do not even allow such a thought to cross your mind. Every moment I spend with you brings me great joy." He moved her smaller, slender body toward the bed by simply crowding her with his larger, heavier frame. The sun was moving in the sky; he could feel it, feel the effects on his already tired body. "In your learning, I can experience the joy of each gift all over again."

Jaxon climbed onto the bed almost absently, biting on her lower lip in deep thought. "I don't want you to be sad for me. Is that it? Don't pity me, Lucian. I couldn't stand that."

He dragged the thick cotton robe from her body even though she made an attempt to hold it around her modestly. His own robe was left on the floor in an untidy heap. His arms swept her backward so that she landed on the bed, her large eyes staring up at him. "How could I possibly feel pity for a woman who has Lucian Daratrazanoff as her lifemate? He is quite handsome-I have it on good authority. s.e.xy. Hot is the term I believe was used."

Jaxon knew a blush was covering her entire body. His hands were moving over her skin gently, a leisurely exploration, as if he couldn't quite keep from touching her. She closed her eyes and gave herself up to the feeling of his hands on her body. "He is hot, but he's also quite arrogant."

"He has beautiful eyes," he murmured, his mouth finding the corner of hers, teasing, skimming, his teeth nipping tenderly. "You like his eyes."

The pleasure he gave her was indescribable. She could think of no words to explain the sensations sweeping through her body. Warmth. Happiness. Lucian was indulging himself, tracing his hands over her skin for the sheer delight of it.

He shaped the creamy swell of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, took tremendous enjoyment in feeling the way her nipples pushed pleadingly against his palms. He bent his head to place a kiss in the center of her throat. His hair slid over her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, an exquisite torment.