Dark Dreams Part 11

Mrs. Crawford glanced at Sergeant Gioia. After a second, the officer nodded.

The look she gave Lila was a lot more searching than Lila would have liked.

"How's Karin?" Lila asked quickly. "Is there any news?"

Sergeant Gioia was silent for a minute. "There's news, yes. She's probably not going to make it."

DARK DREAMS * 177.

Lila was standing in the shower under the hottest water she could stand. The spray felt as though it was peeling her skin off, but it still wasn't enough. It would never wash away the blood this time. Even if every bit of Lila's body was washed away, nothing would ever get rid of this blood.

I attacked a human last night. A person. For no reason. I truly am a monster.

Lila tried to console herself by remembering how Karin had goaded her, but it didn't do any good. You didn't rip peoples' throats out just because they were hateful!

Just having Karin see you change into a wolf would have been scary enough for her, Lila told herself bitterly. You didn 't have to go all the way.

But could she have controlled herself once the transformation had started? Lila didn't think so. It had all happened so fast that there hadn't been time to run away. Maybe her rage at Karin had speeded things up, though. Maybe if she'd managed to stay calmer, she'd have been able to get out of sight before she changed.

Maybe it was her fault, and maybe it wasn't. But 178 * Children of the Night what was the use of trying to decide? It wouldn't make any difference to Karin.

It was the first time Lila could remember walking into a totally silent school. So the word was out, then.

No one was moving. People huddled in frightened-looking clumps along the rows of lockers, speaking in whispers. Now and then a teacher would walk to a cla.s.sroom door and peer out into the hall, but that was all. The princ.i.p.al had probably told them to go easy on the kids this morning.

Maybe they 'II even give us those trauma-counseling sessions kids on the TV news get when a sniper or something attacks their school Boy, I should be first in line.

It seemed to Lila that her footsteps were much too loud. She thought everyone turned and stared at her as she walked down the hall, but that had to be her imagination. No one could possibly connect her with what had happened to Karin, could they?

Could they?

Lila continued down the hall under those watchful eyes. Her locker seemed much too far away. The DARK DREAMS * 179.

corridor was endless. She felt as though she were walking underwater-slowly, falteringly-to reach it.

When she finally got there, Marci and Samantha were waiting for her.

"Hey, nice to see you again," Lila said automatically. "How are you?"

Samantha didn't even bother answering the question. "You heard, right?" she whispered eagerly. She was as peppy as ever, Lila noticed dryly. This might be bad news, but there are some people who live to spread bad news. "That Karin's not expected to live?"

"I heard." Lila opened her locker door without seeing it, her mind racing. Am I a murderer if she dies?

"Corey's really, really upset," Marci said. "We ran into him this morning. He was driving to the hospital to see her. He's the one who found her, you know."

"No, I-I didn't know that." It took a terrible effort to get the words out.

"She was talking when he found her, he said. Babbling, kind of."

180 * Children of the Night "What did she say?" Lila asked in alarm.

"Something about being attacked, I guess. He told us none of it made any sense," Marci told her.

"He said she sounded crazy," Samantha said. "She must've been so scared she lost her mind. Corey was pretty freaked out. He thinks that even if she lives, she'll never be normal again."

"And he told us to give you a message," Marci put in.

"A message," Lila repeated dully. What now?

"He has to talk to you." Samantha's eyes were bright with curiosity and suspicion. "He says it's important."

The New Patient People sometimes joke about the Bancroft Psychiatric Facility. It would be so much easier to take if it didn'I look so much like a . . . well, an old-fashioned lunatic asylum. The place is a dark-red Victorian monstrosity. Tiny barred windows, steep pointed dormers, a ma.s.sive front door with an iron ring for a knocker-the works. You half-expect, on walking up the narrow front path (brick, of course) to hear organ music and piercing shrieks wafting down from the top floor. When people pa.s.s the sharp-pointed iron fence that runs the length of the property, they can't help shuddering. Then they laugh at themselves half-heartedly.

Inside, though, everything is fine. It's all perfectly up-to-date and clean. This isn't the snake pit, you realize with a sigh of relief as you step inside. It's just a hospital.

Someone new has arrived at Bancroft today. That's her room down the hall there. The closed door with the little window in the center. You can look in, if you like. You won't disturb her. In fact, she won't even know you're there.

She's about sixteen, with a face that's too thin and 182 * Children of the Night sharp for real prettiness. Her throat is heavily bandaged, which is just as well; the scars underneath are rather . . . distinctive. Not to her, of course. She's not aware that she has them.

The girl is so quiet, lying there on her bed in the dim room, that at first you might think she's sleeping. But her eyes are open, and staring at the ceiling with a fixed look of terror. And her lips are moving. They never stop moving, never stop their ceaseless whispered entreaties.

She's not a very appealing person, it's true. If you had known her before this happened to her, you might not have liked her. But even her worst enemies would agree that she's been punished enough. No one that young should be so terrified. So permanently terrified.

Most of the residents at Bancroft get better. Most of them get to go home and start over again. But not Karin Engals.

Karin is never going home.

CHAPTER.

"Lila!"

Lila was walking through a department store, idly checking a price tag, when she heard him coming up behind her. She turned with a sinking heart and saw Corey Ryan.

"Hi, Corey," she said with a wan smile. "Where'd you come from?"

"Didn't you hear me?" he asked. "Geez, I called you about five hundred times! I thought you'd just keep going forever and never turn around."

Good call, Lila wanted to say. These days, about the only way she could take her mind off things was to walk and walk and walk until she tired herself out. Today was Sat.u.r.day. She had come downtown in the hopes that she'd find more to distract herself. Just walking around the block at home over and over wasn't doing the trick.

184 * Children of the Night "Well, I'm glad I spotted you," Corey was saying. "Why didn't you call me back, Lila?"

He had called a dozen times over the past two days. And every time he'd called, Lila had asked her mother to say she would call back later.

"I've had a lot on my mind," Lila said evasively. She stared down at the gla.s.s counter in front of her. It was piled with leather gloves, sixty percent off. She didn't need any.

"Do you have time for coffee or something?" Corey asked. "I really have to talk to you."

"About what?" Lila said, trying to sound impatient. Her heart was thudding with dread, but she couldn't let Corey see that. "Haven't we talked enough already? What more do we have to talk about?"

"About Karin," said Corey.

Lila's stomach lurched. He knows! she thought, fighting for breath. He's tracked me down!

Then: No, no, he couldn't know. He didn't see anything. He has no reason to guess I'm involved. Just keep calm.

And stay mad. It was a good way to disguise fear.

"What about Karin?" Lila asked coldly. "You've DARK DREAMS * 185.

got a lot of nerve talking about your new girlfriend to your old one.'' The saleswoman behind the glove counter was watching them curiously, Lila saw. We're putting on quite a soap opera for her, she thought. Maybe, if I try to look as if I'm shoplifting, she'll kick me out of the store and I won't have to go through with this.

Unfortunately, the saleswoman simply continued to watch the show without interfering. But Corey was starting to look tense.

"Lila," he began wearily, "this has nothing to do with us. She's asking for you."

Oh, no. "For me? Why would she want to see me?"

"G.o.d knows," said Corey simply. "She just wants to see you. It's about the only un-mixed-up thing she's said since she was attacked, and I think it's the least you can do for her."

Lila relaxed a little. Corey obviously didn't know what had happened. He wouldn't have been able to hide it if he'd known. If she could just keep up her end of the conversation, she'd be fine. Pretending to be angry seemed to be working okay. All Lila cared about any longer was not giving herself away.

186 * Children of the Night "Why should I want to do anything for Karin Engals?" she asked, sticking her chin into the air. "It's not as if I owe her something. We never even liked each other!"

"I know, but-Lila, she's really lost her mind." Corey looked as if it hurt to have to say something so final out loud. "They don't expect her ever to get better, you know."

Lila snorted. "That's really flattering. She wants to see me because she's lost her mind. Thanks a lot."

"Now, you know that's not what I-Hey, where are you going?"

"I'm leaving," Lila shot back over her shoulder as she walked swiftly toward the door. "You can find someone else to insult."

"Lila, that's not what I-d.a.m.n it, come back here!"

But Lila was gone.

I'm safe, she thought as she boarded the bus that would take her home. I'm really safe.

If Corey didn't suspect anything, then no one DARK DREAMS * 187.

would. And even if Karin became coherent enough to tell the truth, who'd believe her? A girl in a psychiatric hospital who said she'd been attacked by a werewolf?

"Yeah, right," Lila said under her breath. She was shaking with relief. Her secret would never need to come out.

And now all I have to do is put this behind me.

All of it. The transformations, the dreams, the- Lila set her jaw resolutely-the boy on the motorcycle. She had flown too close to an evil sun, and she had been scorched. She had to pull back now, or she'd burn up completely.

Pulling back was the only way to keep the truth hidden, she knew. No one would ever guess as long as Lila kept her secret self roped in. This was her chance to return to the safe, secure life she'd known before all this stuff had started happening. But it all depended on her keeping herself within bounds.

If I can just start acting like the old Lila again . . . If I just swear never to give in to my wolf side again . . . If I can just try hard enough!

188 * Children of the Night DARK DRKAMS * 189.

It had to work. It had to.

But would it be enough for her, going back to the tame old life she'd lived before?

Lila slammed the door shut on that question. She wasn't going to let herself think about that kind of thing anymore. It would have to be enough. Better a dull, ordinary life than one so dramatic you caused tragedies every time you turned around. She might as well try to be mature about this. Pa.s.sion was just too much of a risk.

The bus was almost at her stop before she heard the familiar purring of a motorcycle coming up alongside.

Lila closed her eyes and tried to steady her breath, which had suddenly gone all ragged. No. No. This was the one thing she couldn't let herself think about if she wanted everything to work out!

I'm going to be a regular person again, she reminded herself. Marci and Samantha were right There's no reason for me to get all excited about a guy I don't even know.

"I'm not even going to look out the window," she muttered through clenched teeth. "So you can just forget about me."

The motorcycle drew up to her window and stayed there.

Lila tried. She really did. And when she finally : gave up and glanced out the window, she saw that he was just outside the bus. He was riding along i; exactly parallel to her window, like a police escort.

;';Once he looked up into Lila's face as though reminding her of something. Like a child, she slid down into her seat so she wouldn't have to see him.

When she looked up again, he was gone.

Lila tried to ignore how flat and empty she felt after that.

As the time for her next transformation drew closer, Lila began to make her plans. This time the Jt moon wasn't going to get her. This time, she was f going to stay herself. And if something went wrong and she transformed anyway-well, she wouldn't be able to get out of the house. She wouldn't be able ; to hurt anyone. Except herself.

f,"Lila, it turns out that both your father and I I.

> need to be away for a few days next week," Mrs.

f Crawford said one afternoon. She pointed to her desk calendar. "See, right here. We're both leaving 190 * Children of the Night on Tuesday and coming back on Sat.u.r.day. Would you like me to arrange for someone to stay with you?"

"Stay with me?" Lila repeated. "Mom, I'm sixteen! I'll be fine."

"Make sure you take care of yourself, then," her mother said. "I certainly don't want to come home and hear that anything went on in this house that shouldn't have."

"I promise, Mom," Lila said solemnly. I plan to make sure no one hears about it. And you couldn 't possibly have picked a better time to take a trip.

Her transformation would take place during the time her parents were gone.