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Hey guys, I'm back!! Thanks for waiting!! That being said, I have to say that unfortunately, my exams are not over yet, but I do plan on updating CSWH again. I cannot promise that I will be able to manage my usual weekly schedule, but I will do my best! On that note, please enjoy the chapter~CSWH Chapter 73: The Break of Brother and I
That day, I was called by Father and headed towards the study.
It must have been quite an important matter, as Elder Brother had also returned from the Academy and we headed there together.
"……so you've come?"
The first thing we saw upon entering the study was Father's emaciated state, rendering us speechless.
It was as if his body was clad in the same dark shadow from when we lost Mother.
"Sit over there."
As instructed, we sat on chairs facing Father.
"…….on this day, I have pa.s.sed down judgment that Wiel Anderson is to be under house arrest eternally."
House arrest meant punishment in which one would be confined within their estate.
For it to be eternal confinement meant that as long as he was alive, he would never be able to leave his designated estate - it was an extremely harsh punishment.
"For uncle? What could he have done for such a punishment to be……"
Elder Brother was just as bewildered as I was, and exposed that on his face in an unusual instance as he asked Father thus.
"What, you ask. He had Melilda killed, and was the prime culprit in the attacks on the two of you."
At those words, we were momentarily at a loss for words.
"I was just that much of an unforgiveable existence to him, apparently…….I'm sorry that my past mistakes ended up dragging the both of you into it as well."
Seeing Father laugh at himself in self-derision, I felt my chest clench tightly.
…….just how much of a burden must it be for his most beloved person to have been killed by his family?
I couldn't even imagine it.
The loss of someone you love…….that was something I could still sympathize with.
Because we were all the same.
Whether it be love for a family member or love for a spouse, to the three of us, she was an important, irreplaceable existence.
I am sure that sense of loss was the same.
However, that person that he didn't want to lose was stolen away by someone who he similar thought of as important. By no means could I imagine Father's current feelings.
Rather, I didn't want to imagine it.
Like if Rui were to die by Elder Brother's hands……..such an impossible situation.
That was precisely why I couldn't say anything.
For us who hardly had any memories of our uncle, the first thing that gushed forth upon hearing Father's words was anger and hatred towards uncle.
Honestly, house arrest was an intolerably indulgent punishment.
However, when I thought of Father's feelings…….I found myself unable to say anything.
Because I didn't want to be like before, where I only prioritized my own feelings, and made light of Father's and Elder brother's……of all the feelings of the important people around me.
The room was enveloped by a heavy atmosphere.
Neither I, nor Elder brother, nor Father opened our mouths.
Though we all tried to open them, in the next moment we would close them again.
…….an unknown amount of time pa.s.sed.
Father once again opened his mouth.
"…….that is all I wanted to say."
With a twitch, the bodies of both Elder brother and I started to tremble.
……there were things I wanted to ask, and things I wanted to say.
However, all those thoughts were blurred out by bewilderment and I could not put them into words.
In the end, I was unable to say anything and simply stood on the spot.
At the same time, Elder brother who was sitting next to me also stood up.
And then the both of us left the room.
Like that, we silently walked down the corridor.
We did not have any sort of goal in mind.
Despite the fact that when we were summoned by Father to his study, the plans that I had to do afterwards came to mind one after the other…….due to the earlier shock, all of that was blown away.
"…….shall we rest together for a while?"
Elder brother laughed weakly as he said that.
I silently nodded, and headed with Elder brother towards the parlour.
And upon reaching the room, Elder brother and I sat down.
The servants prepared tea, and left each of us a cup.
I slowly raised the cup and swallowed down the warm tea.
It felt like that warmth had the most calming effect on my heart.
"……you've changed quite a bit."
"Thank you. It is the fruits of Aurelisama's teachings."
"It's not that……..I thought that you'd be more enraged when you heard Father's story earlier."
"My…….I am no longer a child that cannot surmise Father's heart."
"I see…….that's true."
Leaking out a dry smile, Elder brother placed the cup that he had been holding onto the table.
"Then I guess that it means that I haven't grown up yet."
"……are you saying that you hate Uncle?"
"I don't know……..no, honestly speaking I hate him. It's just that for some reason the feeling of wanting to cry is greater than that."
"That's…….I also felt the same."
"…….has Mellice ever had the chance to meet Uncle?"
"No. Even after Elder brother went to the Academy, I didn't have any particular opportunity to……."
"……I see. Then Mellice doesn't have much memory of Uncle."
"Yes, putting it honestly that is so. I pretty much only have heard his name before."
"…….Elder brother does have some memories with Uncle, right?"
"They're vague though…….but when I was younger, the impression he gave when he held me was very gentle and kind. He was the sort of person that had a slightly troubled smile……..if I had to say, he wasn't like a person of the Anderson Marquis House."
In the Anderson Marquis House, it seems……that relations with our relatives had become thin starting from Father's generation.
One of the reasons for that being because Father found those that kept trying to nestle close to the t.i.tle of Hero as annoying.
On top of that, as I was always training, I was not exactly in a state where I could be presented to our relatives, so I hardly had any memories of Uncle at all.
He was a stranger that possessed the same family name as me…….that was how I recognized him.
"Perhaps that was just how much he desired the position of Family Head of the Anderson Marquis House…….or perhaps he hated Father's existence itself……."
Elder brother continued to speak in a gentle tone of voice.
"In any case, it's done."
I involuntarily tilted my head at Elder brother's words.
"Yeah. With this the battle against Mother's enemy is finished……..although I wasn't able to fight myself."
"No, this is not the end."
This time, it was my words that caused Elder brother to tilt his head.
"In order for there no longer to be people who will have to experience the same feelings that we did…….that desire has remained unchanged. That is why, this is by no means the end."
Elder brother laughed.
He laughed very enjoyably, and proudly.
"……that is true. You got me there……..you truly have become able to look forward."
"Well, who knows? Like I said before, I cannot say that I do not hold any hate against Uncle after all."
"That's the same for me too…….I'm sure that this pain will follow us for the rest of our lives."
"……indeed. However, Elder brother is different from me. Unlike me, Elder brother was not seized by hate, and was still able to continue forward, were you now? Rather, you were even capable of using that as fuel for yourself."
"…….from what I can see, right now you do not appear to be possessed by hatred though?"
"It is because there was someone who helped me through that. The me who lost Mother…….only had hatred. I hated the bandits who stole Mother away, resented the weak citizens who even then continued to seek out Father's help, and continued to curse this irrational world. However, right now…….I understand the warmth of a heart without hatred, and those who brought that about. Though I still have not been able to fully cast away my hatred…….even so, because I had them, I was able to accept this irrational world."
By no means could I say that I had forgiven Uncle.
I am not yet a human being capable of doing such a thing, and Mother was not such a trivial existence inside of me that I would be capable of forgiving such an act.
Honestly……upon learning that Uncle was the one who stole Mother away from us, and seeing Father's haggard self as he put that into words, I once again lamented the irrationality of this world briefly.
Above all else, the fact that the one who killed Mother was someone we were connected to by blood…….the sinfulness in stealing away the life of a relative was so unbelievable that it caused some misgivings to momentarily pa.s.s through one's mind.
I already knew.
That this world that continued to be cursed with hatred was by no means only irrational and cruel.
That there was a warm feeling birthed from coming into contact with other people.
That is why I will no longer become possessed with hatred alone.
Feelings of hate moulded my existence and had taken root in my heart, but…….it did not make up the entirety of it.
Elder brother laughed grandly.
His eyes narrowed enjoyably…….it was such a refreshing laugh that it felt like he had been exorcised of his demons.
"……allow me to thank you, Melly. Thanks to you, I was able to put my heart into order a bit."
"That is great. I too have managed to calm down a bit thanks to being able to talk with you, Elder brother."
As I said that, I smiled once more.
"Well then, please excuse me."