Cineverse - Bride Of The Slime Monster Part 19

The unpleasantly skinny gang member laughed. "Look, fellas! They're fainting before we even get to them!"

They all laughed in a way that indicated they had learned nothing from their recent experience with slime.

With the lightning swiftness of a jungle cat, Zabana leapt across the sand, felling the skinny fellow with a single blow."Zabana even the odds," the jungle prince announced as he danced back to join the others.

"Vrrbbmm! Zrrrbbbmmm!" the Mumbler screamed.

"What?" one of the gang members asked.

"Huh?" another chimed in.

"That guy in the leopard shorts just decked Sneer!" a third explained. "Sneer was the only one who could understand you!"

"Snrrgggmmmm!" the Mumbler raged. "Fllrrrrggg-mmm!"

The sand rose before them for a second time.

"I would go no farther," the familiar voice warned.

'' Snrrzzzzz!" the Mumbler hastily replied. '' Frrssrrzzz!''

"So they give me another chance to pursue my art," Edward the slime creature remarked casually. "It is a shame. Their shame, of course. My triumph! I will call it 'The Entire Gang Covered by Slime for a Second Time.' I tell you, whole new vistas are opening for me!" The monster waved one of its appendages in their leader's direction. "And I owe it all to Delores!"

The monster once again trained whatever you might call its upper appendages on the Motorcycle Mob.

"Gglllffrrtttt!" the Mumbler protested.

"Yip! Bark bark bark!" Dwight leapt forward to interrupt the action.

"Wait!" Louie explained. "He says the Mumbler doesn't want to fight!"

"You mean Dwight can interpret what this guy is mumbling about?" Delores demanded.

"Hey, now," Officer O'Clanrahan interjected defensively. "He is Dwight the Wonder Dog, after all."

"Mssrrmm!" the Mumbler insisted.

"Yip, bark yip!" Dwight replied.

"Grrrrssllm?" the Mumbler asked.

"Yip yip, bark, yip!" Dwight answered rea.s.suringly.

"The Mumbler wants to work with us," Louie explained. "It seems it's getting boring on this surfing world-"

That's when there was another explosion, accompanied by blowing sand and blue smoke. Delores considered how, since the Change, nothing ever seemed to stay boring for long (with the exception of one South Sea Paradise).

" Heh heh," someone at the center of the smoke snickered sinisterly. "How"-he hesitated tellingly-"convenient.''

Delores felt a tap on her shoulder.

"Is Doctor Dread!" Zabana announced.

Delores looked around.

"Hey, baby," a tall, scrawny surfer said in an artificially deep voice. "What's a nice girl like you doing on a beach like this?"

"Faith and begorrah!" Officer O'Clanrahan chimed in, pointing his nightstick at the archvillain. "The bounder is all alone!"

"Not-" Doctor Dread a.s.sured them, "for long."

"What?" Delores whispered incredulously as she stared at this newest intruder in her life.

"What's a nice girl like you doing on-" the surfer started again.

"Why are you asking me that at a time like this?'' Delores demanded.

"I had to wait for you to be alone!" the surfer replied defensively. "You're a popular girl."

"Well, you'll have to wait a little longer." Delores turned back to study their nemesis.

"Hey!" the surfer called over her shoulder. "I'm a better catch than somebody completely covered by sand!"

"Are you?" Delores murmured. She was surprised how sincerely she doubted that.

But Doctor Dread had begun to hesitate meaningfully again.

"I have been meaning to"-Dread coughed delicately- "see you people again, ever since you"-he coughed twice, and not quite as delicately as before-"attempted to dispose of me on that planet of rabbits."

"Your name's Delores, isn't it?" the surfer insisted.

"Interesting that you should be here," Dread continued, "the very place my information indicates is the most likely location of Captain Crusader."

"My name's Fast Felix," the surfer went on, despite anything Delores could do to the contrary, "the most romantic surfer on the beach. When I saw you in that evening gown, I knew we were made for each other!"

"You see, the Captain and I have a little" - Dread coughed more softly this time, attempting to put the delicacy back in - "business."

"Well, you've met me," Delores replied to the man behind her.

"Zabana say we take him," the jungle prince announced.

"My thoughtsh exshactly!" Doc added unevenly.

"Now get lost!" Delores finished.

"I wouldn't do that, if I were you. I'm expecting" - this time, Dread tried to hold back the cough - "company."

"But we'll get him before the company arrives!" Officer O'Clanrahan pointed out.

"We must prevail. We have Dwight the Wonder Dog!"

"Hard to get, huh?" The scrawny surfer jogged forward so that Delores could see him wriggle his spindly eyebrows. "Fast Felix especially likes women in evening dresses who play hard to get."

"Oh, very well, if you" - Dread paused to clear his throat - "insist. Say, you there in black leather."

"Pptttzzzzmmmm!" the Mumbler declared. His gang paid no attention.

"Us?" one of the members of the Motorcycle Mob asked.

"Of course," Dread continued smoothly. "How would you like to be" - the cough was back - "among the future rulers of the Cineverse?"

"Wrrssfff!" the Mumbler yelled. His gang looked the other way.

"So, babe," Fast Felix insisted. "What do you say?"

"Us?" another mobster replied.

"I knew you'd catch on," Dread purred. "Bright fellows. Very well." He paused for another hack, then pointed casually to Delores and her fellows. "Deal with them!"

Fast Felix ran a hand lightly down Delores' spangled sleeve. "I'll show you sand and surf you've never seen before-"

The gang once again approached. Delores pushed Fast Felix out of her way and joined the line of her allies, all once again ready to do battle with the forces of evil.

They had to be doubly wary now. She expected more blue smoke explosions at any second. But would those explosions contain more minions of Doctor Dread, or would they bring Captain Crusader? Whatever happened, she knew for certain, they were facing their moment of decision.

"Hey, babe," Delores heard behind her. "Fast Felix doesn't take no-"

"This is the end of the line for you, Doctor Dread!" Officer O'Clanrahan announced.

"Oh my, no. This is only"-Dread paused to smile evilly-"the beginning."

^ ^ 15 ^ ^

"wave of terror!"

He barely managed to duck the knife. The smoke and fire seemed to have spoiled the woman's aim, unless it was the fact that the boat had sunk an inch or two since she'd thrown her weapon.

Once again, all of Roger's life threatened to flash before his eyes. He remembered Gloria, and Fiona, and Charlene, and Daisy. But he couldn't sink into reminiscence.

There still might be some way out of his predicament. He had to do it, for Delores, Captain Crusader, the Earth, the Cineverse, maybe even the Plotmaster, if Roger could ever figure out what the guy had been talking about-and he had to do it for himself. He didn't want to die in the world of a Foreign Art Film, especially after that dream sequence. For all he knew, once he drowned, or was burned, or was stabbed to death, his ghost would be trapped here in the symbolic sky, skipping after the all-nun band. His mind wandered back to Lulu, and Karen, and Clarissa.

No! He had to think this through. He'd escaped from other tight spots before-well, perhaps they hadn't been as tight as this one. He simply had to look at his predicament in as objective a manner as possible. There must be some way out. Mere hours ago, Dr. Dee Dee Davenport had declared him to be "incredibly lucky." Roger would hate to prove her wrong.

He pushed thoughts of Tanya and Rachel and Sophia from his head and listed his problems. Liv had missed with her knife, so that meant all he had to contend with was a sinking boat that was rapidly being consumed by fire. That, and the fact that the new Captain Crusader Ring he'd gotten from the computer was a dud, so he couldn't get out that way, besides which, his hands were tied, so that there was no way he could get to the ring. His mind drifted to Daphne, and Sheri, and Theodora.

But no-the Plotmaster seemed to think Roger had something special going for him.

Roger tried to quickly remember the points the big guy with the blue-smoke cigar had made. One was that Roger actually remembered the Plotmaster. The other was something about how, with time, Roger would learn his way around the Cineverse.

No he wouldn't. Roger was going to burn up in a boat. The fire felt awfully hot on his face. At least the flames didn't affect his feet, probably because both his sneakers were already under six inches of water.

Wait a minute! All this stuff about the Plotmaster had almost made him forget-a minute ago, he'd been thinking about his new Captain Crusader Ring! But he also had an old Captain Crusader Decoder Ring. Sure, it was defective, but it worked after a fashion, and even the Beach Party surfing world was preferable to existential death!

The ring was only a few inches away, in the breast pocket of his jogging suit. He leaned forward. Was there any possible way he could reach it? His jogging jacket bunched up towards him. For the first time ever, he was grateful for that spare tire that had started around his waist in the last couple of years, that same layer of fat that now pushed his jacket up his chest.

He looked down, and saw that he had left the pocket unzipped. He calmed a momentary panic. He could have lost the ring, but he hadn't. It was still there. He could feel the hard lump of ring and gum, with the point of his chin.

He looked up to see the flames racing down both sides of the boat, burning everything to the waterline, where water and fire turned to steam. Steam and smoke were everywhere. Maybe he wouldn't be drowned or burned after all. Maybe he'd be boiled, instead.

He had to get the ring now. He bent down farther than he had since he was seventeen.

His heart leapt as his tongue tasted hard, stale gum. He had reached the ring! With a superhuman effort, he managed to inch his chin even farther down, grasping the cheap plastic ring in his teeth.

The bow of the boat disappeared beneath the surface of the lake. This was his last chance.

"See oo eh ee unny aa-ers!" he managed.

To his relief, the smoke turned blue.

The smoke drifted away on an ocean breeze.

The ring dropped from his teeth as his mouth opened in shock.

Was everybody here?

"Roger!" Delores yelled.

"Delores!" he yelled back.

"Dr. Dread!" Big Louie pointed.

"Louie?" Roger asked.

"Mffffmm!" the Mad Mumbler demanded.

"Congratulashuns!" Doc slurred, his voice somewhat m.u.f.fled by the sand.

"Roger!" Delores called.

"Delores!" he called back.

"We got a job," a member of the Motorcycle Mob muttered.