Charlotte Bronte and Her Circle Part 25

You have always found me something like a new servant, who requires to be told where everything is, and shown how everything is to be done.

'My sincere love to your mother and Mercy.--Yours,

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_May_ 29_th_, 1847.

'DEAR ELLEN,--Your letter and its contents were most welcome. You must direct your luggage to Mr. Bronte's, and we will tell the carrier to inquire for it. The railroad has been opened some time, but it only comes as far as Keighley. If you arrive about 4 o'clock in the afternoon, Emily, Anne, and I will all meet you at the station. We can take tea jovially together at the Devonshire Arms, and walk home in the cool of the evening. This arrangement will be much better than f.a.gging through four miles in the heat of noon.

Write by return of post if you can, and say if this plan suits you.--Yours,

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_November_ 10_th_, 1847.

'DEAR ELLEN,--The old pang of fearing you should fancy I forget you drives me to write to you, though heaven knows I have precious little to say, and if it were not that I wish to hear from you, and hate to appear disregardful when I am not so, I might let another week or perhaps two slip away without writing. There is much in Ruth's letter that I thought very melancholy. Poor girls! theirs, I fear, must be a very unhappy home. Yours and mine, with all disadvantages, all absences of luxury and wealth and style, are, I doubt not, happier. I wish to goodness you were rich, that you might give her a temporary asylum, and a relief from uneasiness, suffering, and gloom.

What you say about the effects of ether on your sister rather startled me. I had always consoled myself with the idea of having some teeth extracted some day under its soothing influence, but now I should think twice before I consented to inhale it; one would not like to make a fool of one's self.--I am, yours faithfully,

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_March_ 11_th_, 1848.

'DEAR ELLEN,--There is a great deal of good-sense in your last letter. Be thankful that G.o.d gave you sense, for what are beauty, wealth, or even health without it? I had a note from Miss Ringrose the other day. I do not think I shall write again, for the reasons I before mentioned to you; but the note moved me much, it was almost all about her dear Ellen, a kind of gentle enthusiasm of affection, enough to make one smile and weep--her feelings are half truth, half illusion. No human being could be altogether what she supposes you to be, yet your kindness must have been very great. If one were only rich, how delightful it would be to travel and spend the winter in climates where there are no winters. Give my love to your mother and sisters.--Believe me, faithfully yours,

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_April_ 22_nd_, 1848.

'DEAR ELLEN,--I have just received your little parcel, and beg to thank you in all our names for its contents, and also for your letter, of the arrival of which I was, to speak truth, getting rather impatient.

'The housewife's travelling companion is a most commodious thing--just the sort of article which suits one to a T, and which yet I should never have the courage or industry to sit down and make for myself. I shall keep it for occasions of going from home, it will save me a world of trouble. It must have required some thought to arrange the various compartments and their contents so aptly. I had quite forgotten till your letter reminded me that it was the anniversary of your birthday and mine. I am now thirty-two. Youth is gone--gone--and will never come back; can't help it. I wish you many returns of your birthday and increase of happiness with increase of years. It seems to me that sorrow must come sometime to every body, and those who scarcely taste it in their youth often have a more br.i.m.m.i.n.g and bitter cup to drain in after-life; whereas, those who exhaust the dregs early, who drink the lees before the wine, may reasonably expect a purer and more palatable draught to succeed. So, at least, one fain would hope. It touched me at first a little painfully to hear of your purposed governessing, but on second thoughts I discovered this to be quite a foolish feeling. You are doing right even though you should not gain much. The effort will do you good; no one ever does regret a step towards self-help; it is so much gained in independence.

'Give my love to your mother and sisters.--Yours faithfully,

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_May_ 24_th_, 1848.

'Dear Ellen,--I shall begin by telling you that you have no right to be angry at the length of time I have suffered to slip by since receiving your last, without answering it, because you have often kept me waiting much longer; and having made this gracious speech, thereby obviating reproaches, I will add that I think it a great shame when you receive a long and thoroughly interesting letter, full of the sort of details you fully relish, to read the same with selfish pleasure and not even have the manners to thank your correspondent, and express how much you enjoyed the narrative. I _did_ enjoy the narrative in your last very keenly; the exquisitely characteristic traits concerning the Bakers were worth gold; just like not only them but all their cla.s.s--respectable, well-meaning people enough, but with all that petty a.s.sumption of dignity, that small jealousy of senseless formalities, which to such people seems to form a second religion. Your position amongst them was detestable. I admire the philosophy with which you bore it. Their taking offence because you stayed all night at their aunt's is rich.

It is right not to think much of casual attentions; it is quite justifiable also to derive from them temporary gratification, insomuch as they prove that their object has the power of pleasing.

Let them be as ephemera--to last an hour, and not be regretted when gone.

'Write to me again soon and--Believe me, yours faithfully,

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_August_ 3, 1849.

'DEAR ELLEN,--I have received the furs safely. I like the sables very much, and shall keep them; and 'to save them' shall keep the squirrel, as you prudently suggested. I hope it is not too much like the steel poker to save the bra.s.s one. I return Mary's letter. It is another page from the volume of life, and at the bottom is written "Finis"--mournful word. Macaulay's _History_ was only _lent_ to myself--all the books I have from London I accept only as a loan, except in peculiar cases, where it is the author's wish I should possess his work.

'Do you think in a few weeks it will be possible for you to come to see me? I am only waiting to get my labour off my hands to permit myself the pleasure of asking you. At our house you can read as much as you please.

'I have been much better, very free from oppression or irritation of the chest, during the last fortnight or ten days. Love to all.--Good-bye, dear Nell.

'C. B.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_August_ 23_rd_, 1849.

'DEAR ELLEN,--Papa has not been well at all lately--he has had another attack of bronchitis. I felt very uneasy about him for some days, more wretched indeed than I care to tell you. After what has happened, one trembles at any appearance of sickness, and when anything ails papa I feel too keenly that he is the _last_, the _only_ near and dear relation I have in the world. Yesterday and to-day he has seemed much better, for which I am truly thankful.

'For myself, I should be pretty well but for a continually recurring feeling of slight cold, slight soreness in the throat and chest, of which, do what I will, I cannot quite get rid. Has your cough entirely left you? I wish the atmosphere would return to a salubrious condition, for I really think it is not healthy. English cholera has been very prevalent here.

'I _do_ wish to see you.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_August_ 16, 1850.

'DEAR NELL,--I am going on Monday (D.V.) a journey, whereof the prospect cheers me not at all, to Windermere, in Westmoreland, to spend a few days with Sir J. K. S., who has taken a house there for the autumn and winter. I consented to go with reluctance, chiefly to please papa, whom a refusal on my part would have much annoyed; but I dislike to leave him. I trust he is not worse, but his complaint is still weakness. It is not right to antic.i.p.ate evil, and to be always looking forward in an apprehensive spirit; but I think grief is a two-edged sword--it cuts both ways: the memory of one loss is the antic.i.p.ation of another. Take moderate exercise and be careful, dear Nell, and--Believe me, yours sincerely,

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'_May_ 10_th_, 1851.

'DEAR NELL,--Poor little Flossy! I have not yet screwed up nerve to tell papa about her fate, it seems to me so piteous. However, she had a happy life with a kind mistress, whatever her death has been.

Little hapless plague! She had more goodness and patience shown her than she deserved, I fear.

'C. BRONTE.'

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

'HAWORTH, _July_ 26_th_, 1852.

'DEAR ELLEN,--I should not have written to you to-day by choice.