Charles O'Malley, The Irish Dragoon Volume I Part 47

"There they go. Your wild countrymen have heard their _Ranz des vaches_, it seems. Lord! how they frightened the poor Portuguese; look how they're running!"

Such was actually the case. The loud cheer uttered from the river was taken up by others straggling on sh.o.r.e, and one universal shout betokened that fully one-third of the red-coats around came from the dear island, and in their enthusiasm had terrified the natives to no small extent.

"Is not that Ferguson there!" cried the major, as an officer pa.s.sed us with his arm in a sling. "I say, Joe--Ferguson! oh, knew it was!"

"Monsoon, my hearty, how goes it?--only just arrived, I see. Delighted to meet you out here once more. Why, we've been as dull as a veteran battalion without you. These your friends? Pray present me." The ceremony of introduction over, the major invited Ferguson to join our party at supper.

"No, not to-night, Major," said he, "you must be my guests this evening. My quarters are not five minutes' walk from this; I shall not promise you very luxurious fare."

"A carbonade with olives, a roast duck, a bowl of bishop, and, if you will, a few bottles of Burgundy," said the major; "don't put yourself out for us,--soldier's fare, eh?"

I could not help smiling at the _nave_ notion of simplicity so cunningly suggested by old Monsoon. As I followed the party through the streets, my step was light, my heart not less so; for what sensations are more delightful than those of landing after a voyage? The escape from the durance vile of shipboard, with its monotonous days and dreary nights, its ill-regulated appointments, its cramped accommodation, its uncertain duration, its eternal round of unchanging amus.e.m.e.nts, for the freedom of the sh.o.r.e, with a land breeze, and a firm footing to tread upon; and certainly, not least of all, the sight of that brightest part of creation, whose soft eyes and tight ankles are, perhaps, the greatest of all imaginable pleasures to him who has been the dweller on blue water for several weeks long.

"Here we are," cried out Ferguson, as we stopped at the door of a large and handsome house. We follow up a s.p.a.cious stair into an ample room, sparingly, but not uncomfortably furnished: plans of sieges, maps of the seat of war, pistols, sabres, and belts decorated the white walls, and a few books and a stray army list betokened the habits of the occupant.

While Ferguson disappeared to make some preparations for supper, Monsoon commenced a congratulation to the party upon the good fortune that had befallen them. "Capital fellow is Joe; never without something good, and a rare one to pa.s.s the bottle. Oh, here he comes. Be alive there, Sparks, take a corner of the cloth; how deliciously juicy that ham looks. Pa.s.s the Madeira down there; what's under that cover,--stewed kidneys?" While Monsoon went on thus we took our places at the table, and set to with an appet.i.te which only a newly-landed traveller ever knows.

"Another spoonful of the gravy? Thank you. And so they say we've not been faring over well latterly?" said the major.

"Not a word of truth in the report. Our people have not been engaged. The only thing lately was a smart brush we had at the Tamega. Poor Patrick, a countryman of ours, and myself were serving with the Portuguese brigade, when Laborde drove us back upon the town and actually routed us. The Portuguese general, caring little for anything save his own safety, was making at once for the mountains when Patrick called upon his battalion to face about and charge; and n.o.bly they did it, too. Down they came upon the advancing ma.s.ses of the French, and literally hurled them back upon the main body. The other regiments, seeing this gallant stand, wheeled about and poured in a volley, and then, fixing bayonets, stormed a little mount beside the hedge, which commanded the whole suburb of Villa Real. The French, who soon recovered their order, now prepared for a second attack, and came on in two dense columns, when Patrick, who had little confidence in the steadiness of his people for any lengthened resistance, resolved upon once more charging with the bayonet. The order was scarcely given when the French were upon us, their flank defended by some of La Houssaye's heavy dragoons. For an instant the conflict was doubtful, until poor Patrick fell mortally wounded upon the parapet; when the men, no longer hearing his bold cheer, nor seeing his n.o.ble figure in the advance, turned and fled, pell-mell, back upon the town. As for me, blocked up amidst the ma.s.s, I was cut down from the shoulder to the elbow by a young fellow of about sixteen, who galloped about like a schoolboy on a holiday. The wound was only dangerous from the loss of blood, and so I contrived to reach Amacante without much difficulty; from whence, with three or four others, I was ordered here until fit for service."

"But what news from our own head-quarters?" inquired I.

"All imaginable kind of rumors are afloat. Some say that Craddock is retiring; others, that a part of the army is in motion upon Caldas."

"Then we are not going to have a very long sojourn here, after all, eh, Major? Donna Maria de Tormes will be inconsolable. By-the-bye, their house is just opposite us. Have you never heard Monsoon mention his friends there?"

"Come, come, Joe, how can you be so foolish?"

"But, Major, my dear friend, what signifies your modesty? There is not a man in the service does not know it, save those in the last gazette."

"Indeed, Joe, I am very angry with you."

"Well, then, by Jove! I must tell it, myself; though, faith, lads, you lose not a little for want of Monsoon's tact in the narrative."

"Anything is better that trusting to such a biographer," cried the major; "so here goes:--

"When I was acting commissary-general to the Portuguese forces some few years ago, I obtained great experience of the habits of the people; for though naturally of an unsuspecting temperament myself, I generally contrive to pick out the little foibles of my a.s.sociates, even upon a short acquaintance. Now, my appointment pleased me very much on this score,--it gave me little opportunities of examining the world. 'The greatest study of mankind is man,'--Sparks would say woman, but no matter.

"Now, I soon discovered that our ancient and very excellent allies, the Portuguese, with a beautiful climate, delicious wines, and very delightful wives and daughters, were the most infernal rogues and scoundrels ever met with. 'Make yourself thoroughly acquainted with the leading features of the natives,' said old Sir Harry to me in a despatch from head-quarters; and, faith, it was not difficult,--such open, palpable, undisguised rascals never were heard of. I thought I knew a thing or two myself, when I landed; but, Lord love you! I was a babe, I was an infant in swaddling clothes, compared with them; and they humbugged me,--ay, _me!_--till I began to suspect that I was only walking in my sleep.

"'Why, Monsoon,' said the general, 'they told me you were a sharp fellow, and yet the people here seem to work round you every day. This will never do. You must brighten up a little or I shall be obliged to send you back.'

"'General,' said I, 'they used to call me no fool in England; but, somehow, here--'

"'I understand,' said he; 'you don't know the Portuguese; there's but one way with them,--strike quickly, and strike home. Never give them time for roguery,--for if they have a moment's reflection, they'll cheat the devil himself; but when you see the plot working, come slap down and decide the thing your own way.'

"Well, now, there never was anything so true as this advice, and for the eighteen months I acted upon it, I never knew it to fail.

"'I want a thousand measures of wheat.'

"'Senhor Excellenza, the crops have been miserably deficient, and----'

"'Sergeant-major,' I would say, 'these poor people have no corn; it's a wine country,--let them make up the rations that way.'

"The wheat came in that evening.

"'One hundred and twenty bullocks wanted for the reserve.'

"'The cattle are all up the mountains.'

"'Let the alcalde catch them before night or I'll catch _him_.'

"Lord bless you! I had beef enough to feed the Peninsula. And in this way, while the forces were eating short allowance and half rations elsewhere, our brigade were plump as aldermen.

"When we lay in Andalusia this was easy enough. What a country, to be sure!

Such vineyards, such gardens, such delicious valleys, waving with corn and fat with olives; actually, it seemed a kind of dispensation of Providence to make war in. There was everything you could desire; and then, the people, like all your wealthy ones, were so timid, and so easily frightened, you could get what you pleased out of them by a little terror.

My scouts managed this very well.

"'He is coming,' they would say, 'after to-morrow.'

"'_Madre de Dios!_'

"'I hope he won't burn the village.'

"'_Questos infernales Ingleses!_ how wicked they are.'

"'You'd better try what a sack of moidores or doubloons might do with him; he may refuse them, but make the effort.'

"Ha!" said the major, with a long-drawn sigh, "those were pleasant times; alas, that they should ever come to an end! Well, among the old hidalgos I met there was one Don Emanuel Selvio de Tormes, an awful old miser, rich as Croesus, and suspicious as the arch-fiend himself. Lord, how I melted him down! I quartered two squadrons of horse and a troop of flying artillery upon him. How the fellows did eat! Such a consumption of wines was never heard of; and as they began to slacken a little, I took care to replace them by fresh arrivals,--fellows from the mountains, _cacadores_ they call them. At last, my friend Don Emanuel could stand it no longer, and he sent me a diplomatic envoy to negotiate terms, which, upon the whole, I must say, were fair enough; and in a few days after, the _cacadores_ were withdrawn, and I took up my quarters at the chateau. I have had various chances and changes in this wicked world, but I am free to confess that I never pa.s.sed a more agreeable time than the seven weeks I spent there. Don Emanuel, when properly managed, became a very pleasant little fellow; Donna Maria, his wife, was a sweet creature. You need not be winking that way.

Upon my life she was: rather fat, to be sure, and her age something verging upon the fifties; but she had such eyes, black as sloes, and luscious as ripe grapes; and she was always smiling and ogling, and looking so sweet.

Confound me, if I think she wasn't the most enchanting being in this world, with about ten thousand pounds' worth of jewels upon her fingers and in her ears. I have her before me at this instant, as she used to sit in the little arbor in the garden, with a Manilla cigar in her mouth, and a little brandy-and-water--quite weak, you know--beside her.

"'Ah, General,' she used to say--she always called me general--'what a glorious career yours is! A soldier is _indeed_ a man.'

"Then she would look at poor Emanuel, who used to sit in a corner, holding his hand to his face, for hours, calculating interest and cent per cent, till he fell asleep.

"Now, he labored under a very singular malady,--not that I ever knew it at the time,--a kind of luxation of the lower jaw, which, when it came on, happened somehow to press upon some vital nerve or other, and left him perfectly paralyzed till it was restored to its proper place. In fact, during the time the agony lasted, he was like one in a trance; for though he could see and hear, he could neither speak nor move, and looked as if he had done with both for many a day to come.

"Well, as I was saying, I knew nothing of all this till a slight circ.u.mstance made it known to me. I was seated one evening in the little arbor I mentioned, with Donna Maria. There was a little table before us covered with wines and fruits, a dish of olives, some Castile oranges, and a fresh pine. I remember it well: my eye roved over the little dessert set out in old-fashioned, rich silver dishes, then turned towards the lady herself, with rings and brooches, earrings and chains enough to reward one for sacking a town; and I said to myself, 'Monsoon, Monsoon, this is better than long marches in the Pyrenees, with a cork-tree for a bed-curtain, and wet gra.s.s for a mattress. How pleasantly one might jog on in this world with this little country-house for his abode, and Donna Maria for a companion!'

"I tasted the port; it was delicious. Now, I knew very little Portuguese, but I made some effort to ask if there was much of it in the cellar.

"She smiled, and said, 'Oh, yes.'

"'What a luxurious life one might lead here!' thought I; 'and after all, perhaps Providence might remove Don Emanuel.'

"I finished the bottle as I thus meditated. The next was, if possible, more crusty.

"'This is a delicious retreat,' said I, soliloquizing.