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The colored man compelled attention by presenting himself at the door of the sanctum. He induced interest in his proposal. Then, in addition, _he pointed out a lack and that he could fill it_. Immediately the president _visioned_ the old darkey as an official welcomer, and _wanted_ him. _He reached right out for the service offered_. The sale was closed at once, and the colored man shone in his new glories within a week.
[Sidenote: Conflict of Heart and Mind]
Often a man desires with his heart things that his mind does not approve. Therefore when you work to get yourself wanted, _appeal to the heart of your prospect, rather than to his mind_. Then if _his_ mind raises objections to his desire for your services, _your_ mind at a later stage of the selling process will overcome or get around his mental opposition. When the time for that step arrives, _his heart_ will already have been won as _your ally_, and will help you dispose of the objections _his mind_ has raised.
[Sidenote: Get Yourself Liked]
As a preliminary to getting yourself wanted, get yourself _liked_. Make such an impression, do and say such things, as will draw out of the heart of your prospect _a friendly feeling_ for you. You know of people who have been boosted to notable successes because influential men took personal interest in their advancement.
I recall an office boy who was always ready to perform little extra services. He held his employer's overcoat one day, and the boss rather absent-mindedly handed him a tip. The boy shook his head and declined the dime.
"I didn't do that for a tip. You always treat me fine, and I just like to show you I appreciate it."
The boy's _heart had spoken_, and the employer's _heart responded at once with an especial liking_ for the lad. The seed of personal interest having been planted in the heart of the president, his liking grew. The boy was advanced to better and better positions. He made good on his merits, but he was helped very much because his employer _wanted_ him to succeed.
[Sidenote: The Common Heart of Man]
Reference has previously been made to the fundamental likeness of all men at heart and to their differences in mind. Send out with your voice an appeal to only the _minds_ of your audience--read a table of statistics, for example--and it will affect all your hearers _differently, depending on the mental characteristics of each individual_. But tell a story of great courage, of self-sacrifice, of love--_the same fundamental effect_ will be produced on all the _hearts_ in the audience; though, of course, the various individuals will respond with _different degrees of emotional intensity_.
As has been said before, in order to look into the heart of another man you need but see clearly into your own. There you will find all the emotions of human nature, no matter how you may differ from other men in mentality. Hence if you would prompt the heart of another man to want your services, just _do the things he would need to do to win your liking for him_. Imagine the cases reversed, and be guided in your selling process by what you see.
[Sidenote: Popular Men]
To look at this step from another angle--_if you would be likable, you must find other men likable_. If you like people only within a limited range, you will similarly narrow your own likableness. If, however, you genuinely like all men--like them for their faults and frailties as well as for their merits--you will appeal to the intuitive heart of any other man. You will draw out his liking for you because _the magnetic power of your own heart will not be restricted_ to pulling your way the friendly feelings of only a few people. Instead, you will be a "popular"
man, a man who is _generally_ well liked.
You meet certain men whom you like at sight. You desire further acquaintance, or friendship with them. But these men have not prepared themselves to suit _you_ in particular. Most _other_ people who meet them have the _same feeling_ toward them that you experience. The men you like at sight, and who make friends wherever they go have developed in themselves _feelings of friendliness for all men_. As like breeds like, liking draws liking.
[Sidenote: Artificial Methods Never Deceive The Heart]
If you try to develop particular traits, only because you believe they will attract other men to you, you will not make your nature likable.
Such _artificial methods_ of making yourself attractive _never deceive heart intuitions_. You will not become popular by proceeding _selfishly_. But if you develop within yourself a heartfelt interest in your fellow men, if you are full of genuine desire to serve them with your friendship, _you will attract the liking of nearly all the people you meet_. They will want to know you better and to be your friends.
[Sidenote: No Insulation Against Human Magnetism]
There is "no sich critter" as a natural grouch. A man who has that reputation is _repressing his natural emotions_--that is all. He does not express his true feelings. He attempts to deny that he has them.
_But they are inside him, and you can pull them toward you_ if you bring your likableness to bear upon his heart. He will feel the tug, and will be drawn to you by your magnetic power. _There is no insulation that can prevent the pull of human magnetism_. So treat the crab with a feeling of real liking for the human nature inside, and don't be discouraged by his sh.e.l.l. Be more than ordinarily likable when you have to deal with a surly prospect. Exert all the magnetism you have. He will feel drawn to you. You will get yourself wanted.
J. Pierpont Morgan, Senior, was noted for being unapproachable. But it is said that he took a great liking to a certain newsboy who never acted afraid of him and who treated him as an ordinary mortal. This gamin always had a cheery word for everybody. That he made no exception in Mr.
Morgan's case won the heart of the austere financier, who helped the boy to get an education and to start in business.
[Sidenote: Do Not Over-sell Likability]
The emphasis placed on the importance of likableness as the _princ.i.p.al_ factor in getting yourself wanted may have made you forget the _primary_ necessity of showing your prospect _a real lack in his business, and that you are capable of filling it_. It is possible to attract an employer's liking for you, whether he has a place for you or not. But his liking will do you no good unless you can also make him see he has a need for you.
_Success is not to be won by getting in where you are not wanted, however likable you may be_. You must sell the idea of your service _value_ as well as the ideas that your services would be _liked_. You _cannot over-develop_ the quality of likableness, but you _can over-sell_ it, to the detriment of your own best interest.
[Sidenote: A Winning Personality Sometimes Fails]
One of the most conspicuous failures I know is a man who has "a winning personality." Times without number his genuine agreeableness has won him fine chances to succeed, but in the positions he has held he has never studied the needs of his employers for other qualities than likability.
Consequently he has fallen down on all his big chances. Today he is just a popular door man for a big department store. His intelligence and his physical ability are so evident that he is an object of pity and wonder as he smiles and bows to customers of the store. Undoubtedly if he had studied the different opportunities he has had, and had fitted himself into all the requirements of a particular situation, his winning personality would have helped him higher and higher toward the mountain peaks of success instead of leaving him on an ant hill.
[Sidenote: Three Impressions Necessary]
Of course the mind of your prospective employer acts in co-ordination with his heart when you attract him so much that he really wants the service you proffer. He imagines you rendering that service. He thinks what "might be" if you were a.s.sociated with his business. He paints mental pictures that please him, and he wishes his vision to come true.
But when he begins to imagine you rendering service, the picture of your agreeable personality will not be pleasant to him if he sees that he doesn't really need you. _In order to get yourself wanted it is necessary that you show him the lack, and that you can fill it, and that you would be likable when filling it_. If you make these three impressions on the mind and heart of your prospect, your success in your purpose will be a.s.sured. You will not fail to get yourself wanted.
[Sidenote: Desire is Turning Point Of the Sale]
In salesmanship "desire is the determinant of the sale." By this is meant that _when the salesman sufficiently stimulates a real desire in his prospect, he has climbed the highest grade of difficulty_. If he is skillful, the selling process from then on should be comparatively easy sledding. You realize that if you can get yourself wanted by an employer, the matter of landing a job in his business should not be hard. We therefore are considering now _the turning point in the process of selling the true idea of your best capabilities in the right field_.
After you get yourself wanted, the odds are no longer against you, but grow increasingly in your favor. If, having succeeded in getting yourself wanted, you then fail in your ultimate purpose, you should blame no one but yourself.
[Sidenote: The Use of Tactful Suggestion]
A very skillful use of _tact and diplomacy_ is necessary to success in pointing out to a prospect something that he lacks, and your capability for filling that lack. A man is apt to resent your "picking flaws" in his business. He is likely to regard you as an egotist if you _a.s.sert_ that he needs you. You will not get yourself wanted if you make the impression that you are a critical fault-finder with "the big-head."
Rather, you should pattern after the example of the professional salesman of goods. In the processes of persuasion and creating desire he employs the arts of _suggestion in preference to making direct statements_. He is a tactful diplomat. Learn from his methods, as explained in "The Selling Process."
You have come to a chosen employer, with a real service purpose; but be careful not to _offend_ in your presentation. Do not bring him your idea for improving his business as if it were a great discovery you have made. He won't like it if you open his eyes to his lacks in that fashion. You might better suggest that while you have perceived what he needs, you have no doubt he either has seen it already or would have perceived it if his time and attention had not been engrossed by other things. You will be liked if you so present a picture of the lack and of yourself satisfying it.
[Sidenote: Rubbing the Prospect the Wrong Way]
_You are apt to get yourself cordially disliked if you rub your prospect's pride in his business the wrong way_.
An accountant sought an opportunity to become the auditor for a manufacturing corporation. He had gained considerable "inside knowledge"
of the company's lax business methods. But when talking to the president he exaggerated the relative importance of these defects. In his eagerness to impress the executive with the need for an auditor, he over-drew the danger from leaks in the company's accounting system. The president was exasperated. His pride was stung. What had been said reflected on his capability as an executive. So he turned savagely on the accountant.
"If we're so rotten as all that," he snarled, "how could we make money and pay dividends? No doubt you are right in your criticisms of our methods. But if I had a man like you around here, continually finding fault and picking everybody and everything to pieces, the whole business would be demoralized. The ideas you have brought to me are worth a thousand dollars, and I'll give you my check for that, but no crepe hanger can work for me."
[Sidenote: Avoid Teaching]
When you present your capabilities for sale, don't suggest that you think your prospect's business will go to the "demnition bow-wows" if your services are not engaged. _Understate the lack and your fitness to fill it_. You may be sure the employer will appreciate fully the value of the new ideas you bring, and the worth of your services.
[Sidenote: Pope's Rule]
None of us really like "teachers." Nowadays the most successful educational methods follow the rule laid down by Alexander Pope, "Men must be taught as if you taught them not; and things unknown proposed as things forgot." Do not suggest that you are a "know it all." Much less make the impression that the other man does not know. Communicate to him the idea that you believe he has overlooked the lack to which you call his attention. With modest confidence present your capabilities. You need not a.s.sert in words that you will fill the bill. Your prospect can see that. In everything you suggest and say, show that you genuinely like him and his business. Manifest sincere admiration. _Make him feel that you have come to his office because you especially want to work there. That will make him want you in his service_. Use suggestion to increase his desire for you.
[Sidenote: Reduce Resistance By Suggestion]
_Direct_ presentation of ideas indicates an intention to inform, to teach, to direct the mind of the other man. Every human individual, whether a child or a centenarian, _re-acts in opposition_ to such an effort at instruction. There is something in all of us alike which makes us wish to think and decide for ourselves. Hence the value of the art of suggestion in getting yourself wanted.
Ideas you _suggest_ enter the mind of the other man so un.o.btrusively that _he does not realize you originated them_. He has no feeling that you intend to influence his mind. Consequently he makes no resistance to the suggested ideas. _It never pays to reason when selling an idea; because reasoning invariably brings out a reaction of opposition_. You will not create a desire for your services by presenting them _logically_, or by making an _argument_ regarding your capabilities. One of the greatest students of the human mind a.s.sures us that "most persons never perform an act of pure reasoning; but all their acts are the results of imitation, habit, suggestion, or some related form of thinking."
[Sidenote: Three Reasons For Using Suggestion]
Suggestion is remarkably effective in persuading and in arousing desire because:
First, _every "suggested" idea is accepted as absolutely true unless it is contradicted by other ideas already in the mind of the prospect_.
This is because the prospect thinks a _suggested_ idea is his. He adopts it and makes it his own. That is, his mind takes the suggestion and interprets it in terms of his own thoughts. Of course he believes what he himself thinks. _Say_ to a prospective employer that you would particularly like to work in a.s.sociation with him, and he may believe you are "shooting hot air." He will have no such feeling if you tell him details about his business that have especially interested you. _Show_ him that you have been studying and observing his methods. Give him to understand that you have also investigated other businesses. Thus without _saying_ it, you _suggest_ to his mind that you have come to his office because you really would prefer to be employed there. He will believe the suggested idea; though he might have scoffed at the statement.