Cavalier Songs and Ballads of England from 1642 to 1684 Part 18

From a Rump, etc.

Never were wretched members in so sad a plight; Some were broyl'd, some toasted, others burnt outright; (56) Nay against Rumps so pittylesse was their rage and spite, That not a citizen would kisse his wife that night.

From a Rump, etc.

By this time death and h.e.l.l appear'd in the ghastly looks Of Scot and Robinson (those legislative rooks); And it must needs put the Rump most d.a.m.nably off the hooks To see that when G.o.d has sent meat the Devil should send cooks.

From a Rump, etc.

But Providence, their old friend, brought these saints off at last, And through the pikes and the flames undismember'd they past, Although (G.o.d wet) with many struglings and much hast, - For, members, or no members, was but a measuring cast.

From a Rump, etc.

Being come to Whitehall, there's the dismal mone, "Let Monk be d.a.m.n'd!" cries Arthur in a terrible tone (57) - "That traytor, and those cuckoldy rogues that set him on!"

(But tho' the knight spits blood, 'tis observed that he draws none.) From a Rump, etc.

"The plague bawle you!" cries Harry Martin, "you have brought us to this condition, (58) You must be canting and be plagued, with your Barebones pet.i.tion, (59) And take in that bull-headed, splay-footed member of the circ.u.mcision, That bacon-faced Jew, Corbet, (60) that son of perdition!"

From a Rump, etc.

Then in steps driv'ling Mounson to take up the squabble, That lord which first taught the use of the woodden dagger and ladle: (61) He that out-does Jack Pudding (62) at a custard or a caudle, And were the best foole in Europe but that he wants a bauble.

From a Rump, etc.

More was said to little purpose, - the next news is, a declaration From the Rump, for a free state according to the covenant of the nation, And a free Parliament under oath and qualification, Where none shall be elect but members of reprobation.

From a Rump, &c.

Here's the tail firk'd, a piece acted lately with great applause, With a plea for the prerogative breech and the Good old Cause, Proving that Rumps and members are antienter than laws, And that a b.u.mme divided is never the worse for the flawes.

From a Rump, etc.

But all things have their period and fate, An Act of Parliament dissolves a Rump of state, Members grow weak, and tayles themselves run out of date, And yet thou shalt not dye (dear breech), thy fame I'll celebrate.

From a Rump, etc.

Here lies a pack of saints that did their souls and country sell For dirt, the Devil was their good lord, him they served well; By his advice they stood and acted, and by his president they fell (Like Lucifer), making but one step betwixt heaven and h.e.l.l.

From a Rump insatiate as the sea Liberasti nos, Domine.

Ballad: The Second Part Of St George For England

To the tune of "To drive the cold winter away." (March 7, 1659.)

Now the Rump is confounded There's an end of the Roundhead, Who hath been such a bane to our nation; He hath now play'd his part, And's gone out like a f-, Together with his reformation; For by his good favour He hath left a bad savour; But's no matter, we'll trust him no more.

Kings and queens may appear Once again in our sphere, Now the knaves are turn'd out of door, And drive the cold winter away.

Scot, Nevil, and Vane, With the rest of that train, Are into Oceana (63) fled; Sir Arthur the brave, That's as arrant a knave, Has Harrington's Rota in's head; (64) But hee's now full of cares For his foals and his mares, As when he was routed before; But I think he despairs, By his arms or his prayers, To set up the Rump any more, And drive the cold winter away.

I should never have thought That a monk could have wrought Such a reformation so soon; That House which of late Was the jakes of our state Will ere long be a house of renown.

How good wits did jump In abusing the Rump, Whilst the House was prest by the rabble; But our Hercules, Monk, Though it grievously stunk, Now hath cleansed that Augean stable, And drive the cold winter away.

And now Mr Prynne (65) With the rest may come in, And take their places again; For the House is made sweet For those members to meet, Though part of the Rump yet remain; Nor need they to fear, Though his breeches be there, Which were wrong'd both behind and before; For he saith 'twas a chance, And forgive him this once, And he swears he will do so no more, And drive the cold winter away.

'Tis true there are some Who are still for the b.u.m; Such tares will grow up with the wheat; And there they will be, till a Parliament come That can give them a total defeat.

But yet I am told That the Rumpers do hold That the saints may swim with the tyde; Nor can it be treason, But Scripture and reason, Still to close with the stronger side, And drive the cold winter away.

Those lawyers o' th' House - As Baron Wild-goose, (66) With Treason Hill, Whitlock, and Say - Were the bane of our laws And our Good old Cause, And 'twere well if such were away.

Some more there are to blame, Whom I care not to name, That are men of the very same ranks; 'Mongst whom there is one, That to Devil Barebone For his ugly pet.i.tion gave thanks, And drive the cold winter away.

But I hope by this time He'll confess 'twas a crime To abet such a d.a.m.nable crew; Whose pet.i.tion was drawn By Alcoran Vane, Or else by Corbet the Jew. (67) By it you may know What the Rump meant to do, And what a religion to frame; So 'twas time for St George That Rump to disgorge, And to send it from whence it first came; Then drive the cold winter away.

Ballad: A New-Year's Gift For The Rump

(January 1659-60.) - From a broadside, vol. xv. in the King's Pamphlets.

"The condition of the State was thus: viz. the Rump, after being disturbed by my Lord Lambert, was lately returned to sit again.

The officers of the army all forced to yield. Lawson lies still in the river, and Monk is with his army in Scotland. Only my Lord Lambert is not yet come in to the Parliament, nor is it expected that he will without being forced to it. The new Common Council of the city do speak very high; and had sent to Monk their sword- bearer to acquaint him with their desires for a free and full Parliament, which is at present the desires, and the hopes, and the expectations of all. Twenty-two of the old secluded members having been at the House-door the last week to demand entrance, but it was denied them; and it is believed that neither they nor the people will be satisfied till the House be filled." Pepys' Diary, January, 1660.

You may have heard of the politique snout, Or a tale of a tub with the bottom out, But scarce of a Parliament in a dirty clout, Which no body can deny.

'Twas Atkins (68) first served this Rump in with mustard - The sauce was a compound of courage and custard; Sir Vane bless'd the creature, Noll snuffled and bl.u.s.ter'd, Which no body can deny.

The right was as then in old Oliver's nose; But when the Devil of that did dispose, It descended from thence to the Rump in the close, Which no body can deny.

Nor is it likely there to stay long, The retentive faculties being gone, The juggle is stale, and money there's none, Which no body can deny.

The secluded members made a trial To enter, but them the Rump did defy all By the ordinance of self-denial, Which no body can deny.

Our politique doctors do us teach That a blood-sucking red-coat's as good as a leech To relieve the head, if applied to the breech, Which no body can deny.

But never was such a worm as Vane; When the State scour'd last, it voided him then, Yet now he's crept into the Rump again, Which no body can deny.

Ludlow's f- was a prophetique trump (69) (There never was anything so jump), 'Twas the very type of a vote of this Rump, Which no body can deny.

They say 'tis good luck when a body rises With the rump upward, but he that advises To live in that posture is none of the wisest, Which no body can deny.

The reason is worse, though the rime be untoward, When things proceed with the wrong end forward; But they say there's sad news to the Rump from the Nor'ward; (70) Which no body can deny.

'Tis a wonderfull thing, the strength of that part; At a blast it will take you a team from a cart, And blow a man's head away with a f-, Which no body can deny.

When our brains are sunck below the middle, And our consciences steer'd by the hey-down-diddle, Then things will go round without a fiddle, Which no body can deny.

You may order the city with hand-granado, Or the generall with a bastonado, - But no way for a Rump like a carbonado, Which no body can deny.

To make us as famous in council as wars, Here's Lenthal a speaker for mine - And Fleetwood is a man of Mars, Which no body can deny.

'Tis pitty that Nedham's (71) fall'n into disgrace, For he orders a b.u.m with a marvellous grace, And ought to attend the Rump by his place, Which no body can deny.