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It perished long ago. I ain't deceived you. An' if you don't like the scent o' dead codfish on your decks, you can swab 'em down with Florida water for a month."
Captain Scraggs's mate came around the corner of the house and addressed himself to Captain Scraggs.
"You can give me my time, sir. I'm a steamboat mate, not a grave digger or a coroner's a.s.sistant, or an undertaker, an' I can't stand to handle this here freight."
Mr. McGuffey tossed his silken engineer's cap over to Scraggs.
"Hop on that, Scraggsy. Your own hat is ground to powder. Ain't it strange, Gib, what little imagination Scraggsy's got? He'll stand there a-screamin' an' a-cussin' an' a-prancin'--Scraggsy!
Ain't you got no pride, makin' such a spectacle o' yourself? We don't have to handle this freight o' Gib's at all. We'll just hook onto that barge _an' tow it up river_."
"You won't do nothin' o' the sort, Mac, because that's my barge an' I ain't a-goin' to let it out o' my sight. I've delivered my freight alongside your steamer and prepaid the freight an' it's up to you to handle it."
"Gib!"
"That's the programme!"
"Adelbert," crooned Mr. McGuffey, "ain't you got no heart? You know I got a half interest in the _Victor_----"
"O-oo-oh!" Captain Scraggs groaned, and his groan was that of a seasick pa.s.senger. When he could look up again his face was ghastly with misery.
"Gib," he pleaded sadly, "you got us where the hair is short.
Don't invoke the law an' make us handle that codfish, Gib! It ain't right. Gimme leave to tow that barge--anything to keep your freight off the _Victor_, an' we'll pull it up river for you----"
"Be a good feller, Gib. You usen'ter be hard an' spiteful like that," urged McGuffey.
"I'll tow the barge free," wailed Scraggs.
Mr. Gibney sat calmly down on the stringer and lit a cigar.
Nature had blessed him with a strong const.i.tution amidships and the contiguity of his tainted fortune bothered him but little. He squinted over the tip of the cigar at Captain Scraggs.
"You're just the same old Scraggsy you was in the green-pea trade. All you need is a ring in yer nose, Scraggsy, to make you a human hog. Here you goes to work an' soaks me a dollar a ton when you'd be tickled to death to do the job for half o' that, an' then you got the gall to stand there appealin' to my friendship! So you'll tow the barge up free, eh? Well, just to make the transaction legal, I'll give you a dollar for the job an' let you have the barge. Skip to it, Scraggsy, an' draw up a new bill, guaranteein' to tow the barge for one dollar. Then gimme back $499.00 an' I'll hand you back this receipted freight bill."
Captain Scraggs darted into his cabin, dashed off the necessary doc.u.ment, and returning to the deck, presented it, together with the requisite refund, to Mr. Gibney, who, in the meantime, had come aboard.
"Whatever are you a-goin' to do with this awful codfish, Gib?" he demanded.
Mr. Gibney c.o.c.ked his hat over one ear and blew a cloud of smoke in the skipper's face.
"Well, boys, I'll tell you. Salted codfish that's been under water a long time gets most o' the salt took out of it, an' even at sea, if it's left long enough, it'll get so durned ripe that it's what you might call offensive. But it makes good fertilizer.
There ain't nothin' in the world to equal a dead codfish, medium ripe, for fertilizer. I've rigged up a deal with a orchard comp'ny that's layin' out a couple o' thousand acres o' young trees up in the delta lands o' the Sacramento. I've sold 'em the lot, after first buyin' it from the owners o' the schooner for a hundred dollars. Every time these orchard fellers dig a hole to plant a young fruit tree they aims to heave a codfish in the bottom o' the hole first, for fertilizer. There was upwards o'
two hundred thousand codfish in that schooner an' I've sold 'em for five cents each, delivered at Dunnigan's Landin'. I figger on cleanin' up about seven thousand net on the deal. I thought me an' Neils was stuck at first, but I got my imagination workin'----"
Captain Scraggs sank limply into McGuffey's arms and the two stared at the doughty commodore.
"Hit in the face with a fortune an' didn't know it," gasped poor McGuffey. "Gib, I'm sure glad you got out whole on that deal."
"Thanks to a lack o' imagination in you an' Scraggsy I'm about two hundred an' fifty dollars ahead o' my estimate now, on account o' the free tow o' that barge. Me an' Neils certainly makes a nice little split on account o' this here codfish deal."
"Gib," chattered Scraggs, "what's the matter with reorganizin'
the syndicate?"
"Be a good feller, Adelbert," pleaded McGuffey.
Mr. Gibney was never so vulnerable as when one he really loved called him by his Christian name. He drew an arm across the shoulders of McGuffey and Scraggs, while Neils Halvorsen stood by, his yellow fangs flashing with pleasure under his walrus moustache.
"So you two boys're finally willin' to admit that I'm the white-haired boy, eh?"
"Gib, you got an imagination an' a half."
"One hundred an' fifty per cent. efficient," McGuffey declared.
Neils Halvorsen said nothing, but grinned like the head of an old fiddle. Mr. Gibney appeared to swell visibly, after the manner of a turkey gobbler.
"Thanks, Scraggsy--an' you, too, Bart. So you're willin' to admit that though that there seeress might have helped some the game would have been deader than it is if it hadn't been for my imagination?"
Captain Scraggs nodded and Mr. McGuffey slapped the commodore on the back affectionately. "Aye bane buy drink in the Bowhead saloon," The Squarehead announced.
"Scraggsy! Mac! Your fins! We'll reorganize the syndicate, an'
the minute me an' Neils finds ourselves with a bill o' sale for a one quarter interest in the _Victor_, based on the actual cost price, we'll tow this here barge----"
"An' split the profits on the codfish?" Scraggs queried eagerly.
"Certainly not. Me an' Neils splits that fifty-fifty. A quarter o' them profits is too high a price to pay for your friendship, Scraggsy, old deceitful. Remember, I made that profit after you an' Mac had pulled out o' the syndicate."
"That's logic," McGuffey declared.
"It's highway robbery," Scraggs snarled. "I won't sell no quarter interest to you or The Squarehead, Gib. Not on them terms."
"Then you'll load them codfish aboard, or pay demurrage on that barge for every day they hang around; an' if the Board o' Health condemns 'em an' chucks 'em overboard I'll sue you an' Mac for my lost profits, git a judgment agin you, an' take over the _Victor_ to satisfy the judgment."
"You're a sea lawyer, Gib," Scraggs retorted sarcastically.
"You do what Gib says," McGuffey ordered threateningly.
"Remember, I got a half interest in any jedgment he gits agin us--an' what's more, I object to them codfish clutterin' up my half interest."
"You bullied me on the old _Maggie_," Scraggs screeched, "but I won't be bullied no more. If you want to tow that barge, Mac, you buy me out, lock, stock, and barrel. An' the price for my half interest is five thousand dollars."
"You've sold something, Scraggsy," Mr. McGuffey flashed back at him, obeying a wink from Mr. Gibney. "An' here's a hundred dollars to bind the bargain. Balance on delivery of proper bill-o'-sale."
While Scraggs was counting the money Mr. Gibney was writing a receipt in his note book. Scraggs, still furious, signed the receipt.
"Now, then, Scraggsy," said Mr. Gibney affably, "hustle up to the Custom House, get a formal bill-o'-sale blank, fill her in, an'
hustle back agin for your check. An' see to it you don't change your mind, because it won't do you any good. If you don't come through now I can sue you an' force you to."
"Oh! So you're buyin' my interest, eh?"
"Well, I'm lendin' Mac the money, an' I got a hunch he'll sell the interest to me an' Neils without figgerin' on a profit.
You're a jarrin' note in the syndicate, Scraggsy, an' I've come to that time o' life where I want peace. An' there won't be no peace on the _Victor_ unless I skipper her."