By His Bootstraps Part 4

The drunk was clumsy;Wilson stepped under his guard and hit him hard in the face. It was a solid enough punch to have convinced a sober man, but his opponent shookhishead and came back for more.

"Joe" closed in.Wilson decided that he would have to put his original opponent away in a hurry, and give his attention to "Joe"-by far the more danger-ous of the two.

A slight mix-up between the two allies gave him his chance. He stepped back, aimed carefully and landed a long jab with his left, one of the hardest blows he had ever struck in his life. It lifted his target right off his feet.

As the blow landedWilson realized his orientation with respect to the Gate, knew withbitte ~ certainty that he had again played through the scene to its inescapable climax.

He was alone with "Joe;" their companion had disappeared through theGate.

His first impulse was the illogical but quite human and very common feeling of look-what-you-made-me-do. "Now you've done it!" he said angrily.

"Me?" "Joe" protested. "You knocked him through. I never laid a finger on him."

"Yes,"Wilson was forced to admit. "But it's your fault," he added, "ifyou hadn't interfered, I wouldn't have had to do it."

'Meinterfere? Why, you bald faced hypocrite, you b.u.t.ted in and tried to queer the pitch.Which reminds me-you owe me some explanations and I d.a.m.n well mean to have them. What's the idea of-"

"Stow it,"Wilson headed him off. He hated to be wrong and he hated still more to have to admit that he was wrong. It had been hopeless from the start, he now realized. He felt bowed down by the utterfutility of it. "It's too late now. He's gone through."

"Too late for what?"

"Too late to put a stop to this chain of events."He was aware now that it always had been too late, regardless of what time it was, what year it was or how many times he came back and tried to stop it. He remembered having gone through the first time, he hadseenhimself asleep on the otherside. Events would have to work out their weary way.

"Why should we?"

It was not worthwhile to explain, but he felt the need for self -justifica-tion. "Because," he said, "Diktor has played me-I mean has playedyou us-for a dope, for a couple of dopes. Look, he told you that he was going to set you up as a big shot over there, didn't he?"

"Yes-"

"Well, that's a lot of malarkey. All he means to do is to get us so incredibly tangled up in this Gate thing that we'll never get straightened out again."

"Joe" looked at him sharply. "How do you know?"

Since it was largely hunch, he felt pressed for reasonable explanation. "Why go into it?" he evaded.

"Why don't you just take my word for it?"

"Why should I?"

"Why should you? Why, youlunk , can't you see? I'm yourself, older and more experienced-youhave to believe me." Aloud he answered, "If you can't take my word, whose word can you take?"

"Joe" grunted. "I'm fromMissouri ," he said. "I'll see for myself."

Wilsonwas suddenly aware that "Joe" was about to step through the Gate. "Where are you going?"

"Through! I'm going to look upDiktor and have it out with him."

"Don't!"Wilson pleaded. "Maybe we can break the chain even now." But the stubborn sulky look on the other's face made him realize how futile it was. He was still enmeshed in inevitability; ithad to happen.

"Go ahead," he shrugged. "It's your funeral. I wash my hands of you."

"Joe" paused at the Gate. "It is, eh?H-m-m-m-how can it bemy funeral unless it'syour funeral, too?"

Wilsonstared speechlessly while "Joe" stepped through the Gate. Whose funeral? He had not thought of it in quite that way. He felt a sudden impulse to rush through the Gate, catch up with his alter ego and watch over him. The stupid fool might do anything. Suppose he got himself killed? Where would that leave Bob Wilson?Dead, of course.

Or would it? Could the death of a man thousands of years in the futurekillhim in the year1952? He saw the absurdity of the situation suddenly, and felt very much relieved. "Joe's" actions could not endanger him; he remembered everything that "Joe" had done-was going to do. "Joe" would get into an argument withDiktor and, in due course of events, would come back through the Time Gate.No,had come back through the Time Gate. He was "Joe." It was hard to remember that.

Yes, he was "Joe." As well as the first guy. They would thread their courses, in and out and roundabout and end up here, withhim.Had to.

Wait a minute-in that case the whole crazybusipess was straightened out. He had gotten away from Diktor , had all of his various personalities sorted out and was back where he started from, no worse for the wear except for a crop of whiskers and, possibly, a scar on his lip. Well, he knew when to let well enough alone. Shave, and get back to work, kid.

As he shaved he stared at his face and wondered why he had failed to recognize it the first time. He had to admit that he had never looked at it objectively before. He had always taken it for granted.

He acquired a crick in his neck from trying to look at his own profile through the corner of one eye.

On leaving the bathroom the Gate caught his eye forcibly. For some reason he had a.s.sumed that it would be gone. It was not. He inspectedit, walked around it,carefully refrained from touching it. Wasn't thed.a.m.ned thing evergoin ~ to go away? It had served its purpose; why didn'tDiktor shut it off?

He stood in front of it, felt a sudden surge of the compulsion that leads men to jump from high places.

What would happen if he went through? What would he find? He thought ofArma . And the other one-what was her name? PerhapsDiktor had not told him.The other maidservant, anyhow, the second one.

But he restrained himself and forced himself to sit back down at the desk. If he was going to stay here-and of course he was, he was resolved on that point-he must finish the thesis. He had to eat; he needed the degree to get a decent job. Now where was he?

Twenty minutes later he had come to the conclusion that the thesiswould have to be rewritten fromOne end to the other. His prime theme, the application of the empirical method to the problems of speculative metaphysics and its expression in rigorous formulae, was still valid, he decided, but he had acquired a ma.s.s of new and not yet digested data toincorporate in it. In rereading his ma.n.u.script he was amazed to find how dogmatic he had been. Time after time he had fallen into the Cartesian fallacy, mistaking clear reasoning for correct reasoning.

He tried to brief a new version of the thesis, but discovered that there were two problems he was forced todeal with which were decidedly not clear in his mind: the problem of the ego and the problem of free will. When there had been three of him in the room, which one was theego -washimself?And how wasit that he had been unable to change the course of events?

An absurdly obvious answer to the first question occurred to him at once. The ego washimself . Self is self, an unproved andunprovable first statement, directly experienced. What, then, of the other two?

Surely they had been equally sure of ego-being-he remembered it. He thought of a way to state it: ego is the point of consciousness, the latest term in a continuously expanding series along the line of memory duration. That sounded like a general statement, but he was not sure; he would have to try to formulate it mathematically before he could trust it. Verbal lan-guage had such queer b.o.o.by traps in it.

The telephone rang.

He answered it absent mindedly. "Yes?"

"Is that you, Bob?"

"Yes. Who is this?"

"Why, it's Genevieve, of course, darling. What's come over you today? That's the second time you've failed to recognize my voice."

Annoyance and frustration rose up in him. Here was another problem he had failed to settle-well, he'd settle it now. He ignored her complaint. "Look here, Genevieve, I've told you not to telephone me while I'm working. Good-by!"

"Well, of all the-Youcan't talk that way to me, Bob Wilson! In the first place, you weren't working today. In the second place, what makes you think you can use honey and sweet words on me and two hours later snarl at me? I'm not any too sure I want to marry you."

"Marry you? What put that silly idea in your head?"

The phone sputtered for several seconds. Whenit had abated some-what he resumed with, "Now just calm down. This isn't the Gay Nineties, you know. You can't a.s.sume that a fellow who takes you out a few times intends to marry you."

There was a short silence. "So that's the game, is it?" came an answer at last in a voice so cold and hard and completely shrewish that he almost failed to recognize it. "Well, there's a way to handle men like you. A woman isn't unprotected in this state!"

"You ought to know," he answered savagely. "You've hung around the campus enough years."

The receiver clickedin his ear.

He wiped the sweat from his forehead. That dame, he knew, was quitecapable of causing him lots of trouble. He had been warned beforehe ever startedrunning around with her, but he had been so sure of his own ability to take care of himself. He should have known better-but then he had not expected anything quite as raw as this.

He tried to get back to work on his thesis, but foundhimself unable to concentrate.The deadline often AM.the next morning seemed to be racing toward him. He looked at his watch. It had stopped. He set it by the desk clock-four fifteenin the afternoon. Even if he sat up all night he could not possibly finish it properly.

Besides there was Genevieve-The telephone rang again. He let it ring. It continued; he took the receiveroff the cradle. He wouldnot talk to her again.

He thought ofArma . There was a proper girl with the right att.i.tude. He walked over to the window and stared down into the dusty, noisy street. Half-subconsciously he compared it with the green and placid countryside he had seen from the balcony where he andDiktor had breakfasted. This was a crummy world full of crummy people. He wished poignantly thatDiktor had been on the up-and-up with him.

An idea broke surface in his brain and plunged around frantically. The Gate was still open.The Gate was still open! Why worry aboutDiktor ? He was his own master. Go back and play it out-everything to gain, nothing to lose.

He stepped up to the Gate,then hesitated. Was he wise to do it? After all, how much did he know about the future?

He heard footsteps climbing the stairs, coming down the hall, no-yes,stopping at his door. He was suddenly convinced that it was Genevieve; that decided him. He stepped through.

The Hall of the Gate was empty on his arrival. He hurried around the control box to the door and was just in time to hear, "Come on. There's work to be done." Two figures were retreating down the corridor. He recognized both of them and stopped suddenly.

That was a near thing, he told himself; I'll just have to wait until they get clear. He looked around for a place to conceal himself, but found nothing but the control box,That was useless; they were coming back.

Still- He entered the control box with a plan vaguely forming in his mind.

If he found that he could dope out the controls, the Gate might give him all the advantage he needed.

First he needed to turn on the speculum gadget. He felt around where he recalled having seenDiktor reach to turn it on,then reached in his pocket for a match.

Instead he pulled out a piece of paper. It was the list thatDiktor had given him, the things he was to obtain in the twentieth century. Up to the present moment there had been too much going on for him to look it over.

His eyebrows crawled up his forehead as he read. It was a funny list, he decided. He had subconsciously expected it to call for technical refer-ence books, samples of modern gadgets, weapons.

There was nothing of the sort. Still, there was a sort of mad logic to the a.s.sortment. After all,Diktor knew these people better than he did. It might be just what was needed.

He revised his plans, subject to being able to work the Gate. He decided to make one more trip back and do the shoppingDiktor's list called for -but for his own benefit, notDiktor's .,He fumbled in the semi-darkness of the control booth, seeking the switch or control for the speculum. His hand encountered a soft ma.s.s. He grasped it, and pulled it out.

It was his hat.

He placed it onhis head, guessing idly thatDiktor had stowed it there, and reached again. This time he brought forth a small notebook. It lookedlike a find-very possiblyDiktor's own notes on the operation of the controls. He opened it eagerly.

It was not what he hadhoped. But itdid contain page after page of handwritten notes. There were three columns to the page; the first was in English, the second in international phonetic symbols, the third in a completely strange sort of writing. It took no brilliance for him to identify it as a vocabulary. He slipped it into a pocket with a broad smile; it might have takenDiktor months or even years to work out the relationship between the two languages; he would be able to ride onDiktor's shoulders in the matter.

The third try located the control and the speculum lighted up. He felt again the curious uneasiness he had felt before, for he was gazing again into his own room and again it was inhabited by two figures. He did not want to break into that scene again, he was sure. Cautiously he touched one of the colored beads.

The scene shifted, panned out through the walls of the boardinghouse and came to rest in the air, three stories above the campus. He was pleased to have gotten the Gate out of the house, but three storieswas too much of a jump. He fiddled with the other two colored beads and established that one of them caused the scene in the speculum to move toward him or away from him while the other moved it up or down.

He wanted a reasonably inconspicuous place to locate the Gate, some place where it would not attract the attention of the curious. This both-ered him a bit; there was no ideal place, but heccmpromised on a blind alley, a little court formed by the campus powerhouse and the rear wall of the library. Cautiously and clumsily he maneuvered his flying eye to the neighborhood he wanted and set it down carefully between the two buildings. He then readjusted his position so that he stared right into a blank wall. Good enough!

Leaving the controls as they were, he hurried out of the booth and stepped unceremoniously back into his own period.

He b.u.mped his nose against the brick wall. "I cut that a little too fine," he mused as he slid cautiously out from between the confining limits of the wall and the Gate. The Gate hung in the air, about fifteen inches from the wall and roughly parallel to it. But there was room enough, he decided -no need to go back and readjust the controls. He ducked out of the areaway and cut across the campus toward the Students' Co-op, wasting no time. He entered and went to the cashier's window.

"Hi, Bob."

"H'lo, Soupy.Cash a check for me?""How much?"

"Twenty dollars."

"Well-I suppose so. Is it a good check?"

"Not very.It's my own."

"Well, I might invest in it as a curiosity." He counted out a ten, a five and five ones.

"Do that," advisedWilson . "My autographs are going to be rare collec-tors' items." He pa.s.sed over the check, took the money and proceeded to the bookstore in the same building. Most of the books on the list werefor sale there. Ten minutes later he had acquired t.i.tle to: The Prince,byNiccolo Machiavelli.

Behind the Ballots,by James Farley.

MeinKampf(unexpurgated), byAdolfSchicklgruber .

How to Make Friends and Influence People,by Dale Carnegie.

The other t.i.tles he wanted were not available in the bookstore; he went from there to the university library where he drew outReal EstateBro-ker 's Manual, History of Musical Instruments and a quarto t.i.tledEvolu-tion of Dress Styles. The latter was a handsome volume with beautiful colored plates and was cla.s.sified as reference. He had to argue a little to geta twenty -four hour permission for it.

He was fairly well-loaded down by then; he left the campus, went to a p.a.w.nshop and purchased two used, but st.u.r.dy, suitcases into one of which he packed the books. From there he went to the largest music store in the town and spent forty-five minutes in selecting and rejecting phono-graph records, with emphasis on swing and torch-highly emotional stuff, all of it. He did not neglect cla.s.sical and semi-cla.s.sical, but he applied the same rule to those categories-a piece of music had to be sensuous and compelling, rather than cerebral. In consequence his collection included such strangely a.s.sorted items as the "Ma.r.s.eillaise,"Ravel's "Bolero," four Cole Porters and "L'Apres-midi d'unFaune ."

He insisted on buying the best mechanical reproducer on the market in the face of the clerk's insistence that what he needed was an electrical one. But he finally got his own way, wrote a check for the order, packed it all in his suitcases and had the clerk get a taxi for him.

He had a bad moment over the check. It was pure rubber, as the one he had cashed at the Students'

Co-op had cleaned out his balance. He had urged them to phone the bank, since that was what he wished them not to do. It had worked. He had established, he reflected, the all-time record for kiting checks-thirty thousand years.

When the taxi drew up opposite the court where he had located the Gate, he jumped out and hurried in.

The Gate was gone.

He stood there for several minutes, whistling softly and a.s.sessing- unfavorably-his own abilities, mental processes, et cetera. The conse-quences of writing bad checks no longer seemed quite so hypothetical.

He felt a touch at his sleeve. "See here, Bud, do you want my hack, or don't you? The meter's still clicking."

"Huh?Oh, sure." He followed the driver, climbed back in.

"Where to?"

That was a problem. He glanced at his watch,then realized that the usually reliable instrument had been through a process which rendered its reading irrelevant. "What time is it?"

"Two fifteen." He reset his watch.