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[BL NOVEL] Black b.u.t.terfly (Part 15)
Black b.u.t.terfly, Where Does the Black b.u.t.terfly Go Drink Water by Beep Beep Beep
Proofreader/Editor: Itane, Hwarang
A flight attendant approached Jude, seeing his pale face and asked, “Are you okay?” and after he answered, “Do I look okay? That’s a relief,” he finally arrived at the restroom and went in. The unique smell of an airplane’s restroom irritated his stomach. He wanted to throw up, but it didn’t come out of his throat. Jude just turned on the water in the sink and washed his face. He sighed deeply and shook his head. It felt like all of his organs were struggling to come out of his body.
(Rattle!) The plane probably met a d.a.m.n turbulence that shook the whole plane once. Jude sat on the floor, covered his head and curled up. His body was trembling without control.
How long has it been that I was this scared?
Why am I here?
Let me off! I think I’m gonna be suffocated to death!
Why am I this scared of the plane?
Help me, Superman. If not, even Power Puff Girl.
I’m fine on a tall building.
Did something happen when I was little?
How should I know? I don’t even have a memory.
The restroom in this plane is too small.
s.h.i.t, I can’t put strength in my legs.
“…….d.a.m.n it…..”
So many thoughts pa.s.sed by. Bang bang bang, I bit my lips to calm my dancing heart, but there was a soft echoing of the door that I was leaning on.
“There’s a person in here.”
I answered, my voice cracked a little bit, and of course there was a low voice coming in through the gap of the door.
“It’s me, open the door.”
“Is it an emergency? Go somewhere else.”
“I came because I was worried, open the door. It shook a moment ago, are you okay?”
Suddenly I got so annoyed. I never screamed or was fretful after the childhood that I barely remembered. I couldn’t hold myself, but a gruff voice came out that I couldn’t hold.
“Shut up! You are worried? Do you think I don’t know you? Are you having fun in this situation right now? I’m not having fun at all, just shut your mouth and go sit down, I don’t need you!”
There was no answer. Jude was very unusually unstable. Alvin’s voice mixed his feeling of fear and anger. It was like a water balloon that was about to be popped with a needle. He did think –I might really get killed by that guy right after I get off from the plane- but he couldn’t think any deeper.
I grinded my teeth, so I can put myself together and barely was able to sit on the toilet, but he probably did something because the restroom door was making a rattling sound. I stared at the door k.n.o.b suspiciously and with a weak sound, the door sign changed to ‘vacant.’ I blankly stared at that, and the door opened and he came in with a neat shirt.
“…….Hey, we are seriously gonna get misunderstood by the flight attendants.”
“You asked if I’m having fun, right?”
There was no smile on his face at all. Jude stared at him strangely, and Alvin stood in front of Jude in the small restroom.
“Yes, I am having fun. It’s my first time seeing detective losing your composure. And first time seeing you getting seriously mad.”
“……Do you like me getting mad? Pervert, you were a m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.t?”
“How many times was it that you got mad like that?”
“Do you count how many times you got mad?"
“Don’t throw a question at my question. You can just tell me anything on top of your head.”
“Ah, yes. Four hundred sixty-one times. Okay?”
With his laugh like ‘there’s no helping it,’ Alvin lightly put his hand on Judes shoulder. When he was about to shake off his hand, the airplane shook again, and Jude held his scream and tightly grabbed on to the hand that he was about to shake off. Ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-thump, his heart that barely was able to calm down, pounded like a small drum. He bit his lips to calm down from his shock, a cool hand lightly touched his head. A soft shirt touched a stiff cheek with nervousness.
“Why did you end up so afraid like this? The plane.”
“……I, don’t know…….”
“Do you have some kind of a bad memory?”
“I told you I don’t know.”
When he was stung with his sharp tone, Alvin’s low voice echoed above his head.
“Detective, do you not have a memory of you when you were a child?”
“Why do you ask?”
“When someone ask do you have a memory, people usually answer by saying I do, or I don’t, and if they answer ‘I don’t know,’ doesn’t that mean they might have it but don’t remember it?”
“I’m saying I don’t know because I don’t know. Do you think all the phobias have a great reason for it? I said I don’t know because I don’t remember any particular incident.”
“That must be tough.”
“Don’t say it like you understand. You don’t care whether other people are in pain or not. Don’t say like you mean it when you don’t care. I don’t have time to play along with you.”
With his annoyed voice, Alvin giggled quietly and touched Jude’s hair. He touched it as if he was touching a marble statue in a museum.
“It was a promise, but I think it’s a good thing that I rode this plane. I heard so many truthful words from you. But don’t misunderstand, I do care when you are in pain.”
“Why-“
“Don’t ask why. Even I don’t know everything. I am just a little different person. At the end one can’t really get far from one's kind. The reason why you are strangely in my head……. What should I say. Perhaps I’m lonely when I’m alone?”
“……….Are you also an aerophobic? You are saying something crazy suddenly.”
“Oh my, you were like this in the beginning too, but you are really cold sometimes, detective. Isn’t it obvious people get lonely when they are alone? People unconsciously try to draw a nest that they can go back to, that's what people normally do. And rarely at the same time- that nest is the biggest stimulus for me. Because it is very unusual. Something that I can’t ever feel, something that I can’t feel even in a happy family. Should I say it's a sense of belonging, or consentience? It’s you, detective, that has all those things. You can say that you are the best stimulus and the best resting place for me.”
“Are you planning to say the reason is because I’m similar to you?”
“Who knows. I probably won’t get interested if you are exactly the same as me. You are similar but have some different parts. You have a side where you are way more drier than other people, but you are trying to cover it with rich soil. Way stronger than other people…. but it won’t be perfect. Detective, doesn’t your partner gets surprised sometimes? Like you have a strong stomach, how can you withstand that.”
“It’s Tim who has a weak stomach not me that has a strong stomach. How can I compare to my innocent Tim oppa with a mature member of the society.”
Alvin chuckled deeply, saying “Oh? You got comfortable. Will you be honest once more if you meet the turbulence again?” Suddenly somebody tapped on the door with a fast tempo. A dry voice hit his ears.
“Sir, can you come out? Sir?”
It was flight attendant’s insincere voice. Jude put himself together and stood up and opened the door, and she scanned Alvin and Jude with a strange look.
“You can’t act like this in the plane, sir. Do this kind of thing after you get off from the…..”
“No, it’s not like that. Um, wait. How should I say it, I’m really weak on the plane. So……”
“I followed him because I was worried. He went inside the restroom with a paled face. There was a turbulence too. I’m sorry if you misunderstood. We’ll go back to our seats.”
I get it why there wasn’t any reliable support until now. Oh my gosh, with this face and voice, tone and smile, n.o.body will think he is a serial killer and press 911. They probably think they might get sued for defamation. I clicked my tongue inside of me, and the flight attendant blankly stared at him for a second and quickly moved her eyes to another place.
“Ah, then, um, there are other pa.s.sengers, so please be careful. And if there’s anything uncomfortable please let us know right away.”
“We will. Thank you for caring about us.”
“Kyaaaaaaaaaak-!”
Right after when Alvin smiled and answered, on the other side of the restroom, one stewardess fell and screamed. The scream was like a nail piercing through the brain, so all the attention got focused to there. The stewardess who was on the floor didn’t even have time to organize her clothes. She was shivering and pointed somewhere with her finger. She covered her mouth to stop herself from throwing up and through her hand a moaning sound came out. She pointed something scary in the restroom with her eyes about to pop out. Jude moved first among the people who are froze and went to the restroom.
In the restroom, there was a bag not too big. The thing that’s sticking out from the bag was an cold arm and oddly twisted legs, and a neck that was slashed roughly with a dull knife. If they shove in a broken marionette in a bag, will it look like this? Right after Jude checked the face of the dead person, he turned his head and looked back. It was the kid who whined to open the window.
No way.
The eyes of the serial killer was smiling mysteriously.
-------------------------------------------------------
Who...who....who killed that little boy!!!
Proofreader/Editor: Itane, Hwarang
A flight attendant approached Jude, seeing his pale face and asked, “Are you okay?” and after he answered, “Do I look okay? That’s a relief,” he finally arrived at the restroom and went in. The unique smell of an airplane’s restroom irritated his stomach. He wanted to throw up, but it didn’t come out of his throat. Jude just turned on the water in the sink and washed his face. He sighed deeply and shook his head. It felt like all of his organs were struggling to come out of his body.
(Rattle!) The plane probably met a d.a.m.n turbulence that shook the whole plane once. Jude sat on the floor, covered his head and curled up. His body was trembling without control.
How long has it been that I was this scared?
Why am I here?
Let me off! I think I’m gonna be suffocated to death!
Why am I this scared of the plane?
Help me, Superman. If not, even Power Puff Girl.
I’m fine on a tall building.
Did something happen when I was little?
How should I know? I don’t even have a memory.
The restroom in this plane is too small.
s.h.i.t, I can’t put strength in my legs.
“…….d.a.m.n it…..”
So many thoughts pa.s.sed by. Bang bang bang, I bit my lips to calm my dancing heart, but there was a soft echoing of the door that I was leaning on.
“There’s a person in here.”
I answered, my voice cracked a little bit, and of course there was a low voice coming in through the gap of the door.
“It’s me, open the door.”
“Is it an emergency? Go somewhere else.”
“I came because I was worried, open the door. It shook a moment ago, are you okay?”
Suddenly I got so annoyed. I never screamed or was fretful after the childhood that I barely remembered. I couldn’t hold myself, but a gruff voice came out that I couldn’t hold.
“Shut up! You are worried? Do you think I don’t know you? Are you having fun in this situation right now? I’m not having fun at all, just shut your mouth and go sit down, I don’t need you!”
There was no answer. Jude was very unusually unstable. Alvin’s voice mixed his feeling of fear and anger. It was like a water balloon that was about to be popped with a needle. He did think –I might really get killed by that guy right after I get off from the plane- but he couldn’t think any deeper.
I grinded my teeth, so I can put myself together and barely was able to sit on the toilet, but he probably did something because the restroom door was making a rattling sound. I stared at the door k.n.o.b suspiciously and with a weak sound, the door sign changed to ‘vacant.’ I blankly stared at that, and the door opened and he came in with a neat shirt.
“…….Hey, we are seriously gonna get misunderstood by the flight attendants.”
“You asked if I’m having fun, right?”
There was no smile on his face at all. Jude stared at him strangely, and Alvin stood in front of Jude in the small restroom.
“Yes, I am having fun. It’s my first time seeing detective losing your composure. And first time seeing you getting seriously mad.”
“……Do you like me getting mad? Pervert, you were a m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.t?”
“How many times was it that you got mad like that?”
“Do you count how many times you got mad?"
“Don’t throw a question at my question. You can just tell me anything on top of your head.”
“Ah, yes. Four hundred sixty-one times. Okay?”
With his laugh like ‘there’s no helping it,’ Alvin lightly put his hand on Judes shoulder. When he was about to shake off his hand, the airplane shook again, and Jude held his scream and tightly grabbed on to the hand that he was about to shake off. Ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-thump, his heart that barely was able to calm down, pounded like a small drum. He bit his lips to calm down from his shock, a cool hand lightly touched his head. A soft shirt touched a stiff cheek with nervousness.
“Why did you end up so afraid like this? The plane.”
“……I, don’t know…….”
“Do you have some kind of a bad memory?”
“I told you I don’t know.”
When he was stung with his sharp tone, Alvin’s low voice echoed above his head.
“Detective, do you not have a memory of you when you were a child?”
“Why do you ask?”
“When someone ask do you have a memory, people usually answer by saying I do, or I don’t, and if they answer ‘I don’t know,’ doesn’t that mean they might have it but don’t remember it?”
“I’m saying I don’t know because I don’t know. Do you think all the phobias have a great reason for it? I said I don’t know because I don’t remember any particular incident.”
“That must be tough.”
“Don’t say it like you understand. You don’t care whether other people are in pain or not. Don’t say like you mean it when you don’t care. I don’t have time to play along with you.”
With his annoyed voice, Alvin giggled quietly and touched Jude’s hair. He touched it as if he was touching a marble statue in a museum.
“It was a promise, but I think it’s a good thing that I rode this plane. I heard so many truthful words from you. But don’t misunderstand, I do care when you are in pain.”
“Why-“
“Don’t ask why. Even I don’t know everything. I am just a little different person. At the end one can’t really get far from one's kind. The reason why you are strangely in my head……. What should I say. Perhaps I’m lonely when I’m alone?”
“……….Are you also an aerophobic? You are saying something crazy suddenly.”
“Oh my, you were like this in the beginning too, but you are really cold sometimes, detective. Isn’t it obvious people get lonely when they are alone? People unconsciously try to draw a nest that they can go back to, that's what people normally do. And rarely at the same time- that nest is the biggest stimulus for me. Because it is very unusual. Something that I can’t ever feel, something that I can’t feel even in a happy family. Should I say it's a sense of belonging, or consentience? It’s you, detective, that has all those things. You can say that you are the best stimulus and the best resting place for me.”
“Are you planning to say the reason is because I’m similar to you?”
“Who knows. I probably won’t get interested if you are exactly the same as me. You are similar but have some different parts. You have a side where you are way more drier than other people, but you are trying to cover it with rich soil. Way stronger than other people…. but it won’t be perfect. Detective, doesn’t your partner gets surprised sometimes? Like you have a strong stomach, how can you withstand that.”
“It’s Tim who has a weak stomach not me that has a strong stomach. How can I compare to my innocent Tim oppa with a mature member of the society.”
Alvin chuckled deeply, saying “Oh? You got comfortable. Will you be honest once more if you meet the turbulence again?” Suddenly somebody tapped on the door with a fast tempo. A dry voice hit his ears.
“Sir, can you come out? Sir?”
It was flight attendant’s insincere voice. Jude put himself together and stood up and opened the door, and she scanned Alvin and Jude with a strange look.
“You can’t act like this in the plane, sir. Do this kind of thing after you get off from the…..”
“No, it’s not like that. Um, wait. How should I say it, I’m really weak on the plane. So……”
“I followed him because I was worried. He went inside the restroom with a paled face. There was a turbulence too. I’m sorry if you misunderstood. We’ll go back to our seats.”
I get it why there wasn’t any reliable support until now. Oh my gosh, with this face and voice, tone and smile, n.o.body will think he is a serial killer and press 911. They probably think they might get sued for defamation. I clicked my tongue inside of me, and the flight attendant blankly stared at him for a second and quickly moved her eyes to another place.
“Ah, then, um, there are other pa.s.sengers, so please be careful. And if there’s anything uncomfortable please let us know right away.”
“We will. Thank you for caring about us.”
“Kyaaaaaaaaaak-!”
Right after when Alvin smiled and answered, on the other side of the restroom, one stewardess fell and screamed. The scream was like a nail piercing through the brain, so all the attention got focused to there. The stewardess who was on the floor didn’t even have time to organize her clothes. She was shivering and pointed somewhere with her finger. She covered her mouth to stop herself from throwing up and through her hand a moaning sound came out. She pointed something scary in the restroom with her eyes about to pop out. Jude moved first among the people who are froze and went to the restroom.
In the restroom, there was a bag not too big. The thing that’s sticking out from the bag was an cold arm and oddly twisted legs, and a neck that was slashed roughly with a dull knife. If they shove in a broken marionette in a bag, will it look like this? Right after Jude checked the face of the dead person, he turned his head and looked back. It was the kid who whined to open the window.
No way.
The eyes of the serial killer was smiling mysteriously.
-------------------------------------------------------
Who...who....who killed that little boy!!!
