Beauty Queens Part 36

On the screen, Ladybird Hope leaned closer to the camera. The angle was not kind. There was a p.r.o.nounced ridge in her top lip from too much filler. "Now. You Dreams have a nice lunch, and then I believe you need to go shopping."

45Alexandra's Clandestine Closet, the number-one lingerie store, whose most popular undergarment is the Bicycle Pump-a.s.siereTM, a bra with built-in tires that can be pumped up to simulate any cup size.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE.

Mary Lou's throat hurt from screaming, but no one could hear her down in this cave near the ocean. She and Tane had been tied together and dangled from a hook, which was slowly lowering them over a piranha-filled tank. Below their feet, the ugly, sharp-toothed fish darted back and forth, waiting to take the two of them down to bones. The rope gave a jerk as it lowered another half inch. A piranha leapt, startling Mary Lou, who screamed.

"You all right?" Tane called.

"Yeah. Those things creep me out. Are you okay?"

"Other than being lowered to my death, yes."

"At least we're together."

"True. But I wish you weren't here. I wish it were just me and you were safe."

"Awww, so sweet!" The rope jerked again. "Aaaaahh!"

"At least we're getting a fancy, Greek mythologystyle death. They could have just given us quick bullets to the head. Now we get to die in style," Tane said.

"Was that supposed to be comforting? Because, no offense, it wasn't."

"Nah. I always hated those stories anyway. It's like, any time a human tries to break out and take action for him-or herself, the G.o.ds punish that person. Like Prometheus - he brings Zeus's fire back from the mountain. He enlightens mankind, and so they chain him to a rock and an eagle eats his liver every day."

"My mom tried to get me to eat liver at Rita's Cafeteria one time. I wrapped it in my napkin and flushed it down the toilet." A piranha surfaced. It snapped its teeth. "Yikes. Okay. Need distraction. Tell me another story."

"Princess Andromeda was chained to a rock as a virgin sacrifice to stop Poseidon's sea monster from devouring everything."

"Wow. They really liked the rock-death thingy," Mary Lou said. "What did she do wrong?"

"Nothing. Poseidon was punishing her mother for bragging about her daughter's beauty."

"There we are with the braggy again," Mary Lou said. "So, Andromeda didn't even do anything wrong and she ended up in the ocean? Why?"

"They needed a virgin sacrifice. But then Perseus came and saved her."

"Because the pure girls get rescued." Mary Lou felt something she didn't let herself feel often: She was well and truly p.i.s.sed off. "Why do girls have to be all pure and innocent and good? Why don't guys have to be?"

"No argument here. I always thought it was pretty silly."

"If I weren't about to die, I would totally rewrite that."

"If I weren't about to be eaten by piranhas, I would tell you that I love you."

Mary Lou smiled. "You can still tell me that."

"Okay. I love you."

"Even though I'm a wild girl who likes s.e.x and adventure? Even though I'm not a pure and chaste princess who needs rescuing? Well, technically, I do need rescuing. We both do. But that's not the point."

"I love you for who you are, not for who the world thinks you should be."

Tane stretched his hand through the ropes as far as it would go. He was just able to grasp the tips of Mary Lou's fingers. Mary Lou's eyes filled with tears. "Wouldn't you know, just when I feel okay about myself and find a cool guy, I'm gonna be killed off." The rope jerked harder this time, and both Tane and Mary Lou reacted. It swung out a bit, bringing them close to the ledge. Mary Lou could almost touch it with her feet. She had an idea.

"When my sister and I were kids, we used to have this old tire swing, and we'd swing out over this creek every day in the summer."

"Seems an odd time for reminiscing, but go on."

"See, we'd hold on and swing really hard and try to make it to the other side. If we use our weight, I'll bet we could reach that ledge."

"Dunno. That rope's a bit dodgy. Could snap if we pull too hard, and then we're piranha food."

"We're piranha food if we don't. I don't know about you, but if I'm gonna be chained to a rock by the G.o.ds, I'd rather go out as the person who brought fire back from the mountain than as a pure princess who didn't have the sense to say to everyone, "Oh, h.e.l.l no, you are not sacrificing me to some sea monster!"

"You've got a point. Let's do it."

Mary Lou wasn't sure if her plan would work. Plenty of times, she and Annie had fallen right into the cold creek. But it was worth a try. It took a second to get it - Mary Lou went right when Tane swung left and they twirled around in a dizzying circle for a second. But then they got the rhythm. They pendulumed from side to side. Below, the piranhas zipped about in a frenzy. Overhead, the rope frayed with its next sharp drop, and Mary Lou screamed. But she did not stop swaying. Her feet scrambled at the ledge, sc.r.a.ping rock into the water.

"We've got to build up speed," she shouted.

"If this one doesn't work, the rope will break for sure."

Mary Lou looked up. She bit her lip. The rope was pretty frayed.

"Worth a shot," she said.

They swung heavily and slowly at first, but picked up speed, swinging farther with each pa.s.s. Once. Twice. Mary Lou's feet almost touched! Third pa.s.s and she knew they'd make it.

"You know what, Tane?" she shouted as they came around again.

"What?" he shouted back.

"I totally want to make out with you!"

She swung with all her might, reaching for the other side in defiance of gravity. There was an audible crack as the rope snapped.

CHAPTER THIRTY.

When the girls had finished picking out their clothes and bathing suits for the pageant, compliments of Ladybird Hope's pageant-wear line, Harris showed them around, enjoying his role as beauty queen escort.

"So how did you end up here?"

"Summer internship," Harris said "My dad's CEO of The Corporation. Well, he was. He kinda 'mishandled' things." He put mishandled in air quotes.

"Mishandled how?" Adina asked.

"He sort of lost some revenue. The Corporation posted second, third, and fourth quarter losses totaling around forty billion? So, you know, they had to make some sacrifices, let some workers go."

"How many workers?"

"About forty percent."

"Forty percent?" Shanti said, incredulous.

"Yeah. Sucked. But the good news is that they worked out a deal with my dad. He got a sweet twenty million in severance, plus a full staff, use of the corporate jet and yacht for three years, and we did not have to unload the house in Bimini, thank G.o.d, because, h.e.l.lo? The surfing there? Crazy-good."

"When I run Shanticeuticals, I will not overexpand, screw over my workers, and run it into the ground," Shanti whispered to the others.

Jennifer sidled up to Harris. "My mom was one of those forty percent of workers laid off. She got one week of severance, and it definitely wasn't twenty million. Lost her health care, too. I wouldn't brag about that, if I were you."

They were waiting for the elevator when two black shirts pa.s.sed them by. One of them said something that sounded suspiciously like ...

"Tane Ngata!" Adina exclaimed, stretching her arms overhead. Everyone, including the black shirts, turned to stare at her.

"Do you know him? Are you yourself an eco-terrorist?" Harris was in her face.

"What? No! Why would I?" Adina laughed nervously.

"What did you just say?"

"I was doing my vocal exercises. To be ready for the pageant. I do them all the time. Tane Ngatatatattannnnneeeeetane. Just limbers the tongue right up." She gave him a coy smile.

"Gummi bears!" Tiara pointed wildly to the vending machine in the corner just as the elevator doors opened.

"Our ride's here," Harris said.

Tiara glanced toward the machine. "But ... gummi bears."

"Wouldn't want to mess with those pretty teeth," he said and ushered them inside.

They rode up in silence.

"What kind of a person doesn't let you have gummi bears?" Tiara sat on the cot, her fingers worrying the hem of her new MermaidTopia shirt.

"And everyone seemed to know who you meant when you said Tane Ngata."'

"We may be close to her imaginary BF," Shanti agreed.

"Maybe not so imaginary after all," Petra said.

Adina paced in front of her cot. "This is all very, very strange. My journalist's instincts say there's something going on."

"Or maybe that guy, the eco-warrior, is a terrorist," Miss Ohio said. "Maybe they have him captured for a good reason."

Tiara sniffled. "I don't want to do the pageant anymore. I want to make another hut. That was fun. And I want some gummi bears."

"You can have all the gummi bears you like when we get back," Petra promised.

"If we get back," Nicole said, and it made her arms goose pimply despite the heat.

Someone brought them French fries and soda, and the girls dug in. The French fries were heavenly; the soda burned their throats in a good way. It was just like being back home, like before. For a moment, their doubts were cast aside. They tried to enjoy the fact that they'd finally been rescued, just like in all the stories they'd read as girls. The ones that ended happily. They had new clothes and shoes. Their hair smelled of freesia, their skin of vanilla. All the creature comforts of home.

But if everything was fine, why did they feel so wrong?

"Tiara, what's the matter?" Petra asked. Tiara hadn't touched her food. "Is this still about the gummi bears?"

"No. It's just, I have a question. But it's probably dumb."

"There are no dumb questions," Petra said. "Except for some."

"How come, if they want us to do the pageant, they sent Mary Lou back home? That doesn't seem fair."

It was a simple question. The sort of simple question that could completely unravel a complicated argument.

Agent Jones stepped into the tent. "h.e.l.lo, girls. How's everything?"

"Fine," they said.

"Good, good. Say, I've been meaning to ask, wasn't there a Miss Texas with you?"

"Tayl -"

Adina cut Tiara off. "Why do you ask?"

"No reason. There's always a Miss Texas in the Top Ten. My daughters and I run a pool." Agent Jones tried to smile and managed only a grimace.

"Will your daughters be watching tomorrow?" Adina pried.

Agent Jones blinked and looked away quickly. "Of course."

For the high school paper, Adina had covered a student council scandal in which the student body president had sold test answers in order to buy himself a new SUV. When she'd pressed him on the allegations, he'd done the same blinking and looking away. It was the tell of a liar.

"And they're fifteen and seventeen?" she said, deliberately getting their ages wrong.

"Yep. Fifteen and seventeen."