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"The one she said you shouldn't talk to," Paul said.
"Yes, that one."
"And?"
"And now I know why she didn't want me to talk with her."
Paul sipped a little Irish whisky. He held the gla.s.s up a little and looked at the ice and whisky against the light from behind the bar.
"Good stuff," he said.
"Perfect for male-bonding moments," I said.
"Are we having one?"
"Absolutely."
He nodded. The bar was long and narrow with a tin ceiling and wood paneling, which had darkened with age. The bottles arranged in front of the mirror behind the bar were a shimmer of color in the dim room.
"What did Auntie tell you?" he said.
"Daryl sort of reinvented her childhood," I said.
"Wish I could," he said. "How'd she do it?"
I told him.
When I got through, Paul said, "Wow. She's even more f.u.c.ked up than I thought she was."
"My diagnosis," I said.
"She's a good actress, though," Paul said. "And I like her."
I nodded.
"So, what's the downside," Paul said, "to you finding out who killed her mother."
"Besides me working my a.s.s off for no money?"
"Besides that."
"I can't trust what she tells me," I said.
"Can you ever?"
"Mostly no," I said. "I also might find out a lot more than Daryl wants me to."
"You might," Paul said.
We both finished our whisky. The bartender brought two more. Paul didn't touch his for the moment. He stared into it. The afternoon had moved on, and the after-work guys who got off at four were coming in.
"When I first met you," Paul said after a time, "if you had done what I wanted you to do, where would I be now?"
"You got a lotta stuff in you," I said. "You might have turned it around on your own."
"You think that was likely?"
"No."
"Me either. This is going to f.u.c.k her up all her life," Paul said, "if it doesn't get cleaned up."
"Ah cursed spite that I'm the one to set it right," I said.
"Hamlet?" Paul said.
"Sort of?"
"I think so."
We each rolled a small swallow of whisky down our throats and let the warm illusion spread through us.
"You want me to chase this down," I said.
"All the way to the end."
"It's better to know than not know?"
"Much," Paul said.
19.
The man came into my office without knocking. I was working at my desk and didn't look up until I had finished snipping an "Arlo and Janis" from The Globe to post on Susan's refrigerator door. When I did look up, the man had closed the door behind him and was pointing a gun at my head.
"Arlo and Janis is one of my favorites," I said.
"You see the gun?" the man said.
"I do," I said. "Right there at the end of your arm."
"Boss wanted you to see the gun."
On the left-hand wall of my office was a leather couch. At either end was a bra.s.s floor lamp with a small bra.s.s shade over the lightbulb. The man glanced at it and casually put a bullet through the shade nearest me. The explosion filled the office and made my ears hurt. If the man's ears hurt, he didn't show it.
"Boss wanted you to see me shoot," he said.
The bullet had torn the small bra.s.s shade apart, and it hung in twisted shards around the shattered lightbulb.
"Don't feel bad," I said. "That's the way I shot while I was learning."
The man let the gun hang by his right side. He was tall and languid, with longish blond hair, a deep tan, pale blue eyes, and a diamond stud in his left ear. He wore tan slacks, a double-breasted blue blazer, and a white shirt with a big collar that spilled out over his lapels. He had on light tan woven leather loafers and no socks. He smiled. It made his mouth thin and oddly turned the corners of his mouth down slightly. It was the kind of smile a shark would smile, if sharks smiled.
"I asked around about you," he said. "Everyone told me you were a funny guy."
I ducked my head modestly.
"What I want to know is how funny you'll be when you got a gut full of lead."
"A gut full of lead?" I said. "That's pathetic. n.o.body talks like that anymore. A gut full of lead?"
"I don't think you're a funny guy," the man said. "And my boss don't think so. You need to stay away from the Emily Gordon case."
"You're not with the government, are you?" I said.
He paid no attention to me. The man really didn't think I was funny. He didn't think I was anything. The gun at his side was a 9mm Browning. I owned one just like it. He brought it up slowly and held it at arm's length, pointing it at my forehead. The hammer was back from the previous shot. He wasn't smiling, but there was still something shark-like in his face.
"You unnerstand what I tole you," he said.
"I think so," I said. "Who's your boss?"
He didn't say anything. The black bottomless barrel of the gun stared unwaveringly at my forehead.
"Okay," I said. "Be that way."
"I could do it now," he said.
His breathing seemed shallow and fast.
"You could, but you won't."
I focused on his trigger finger. If it showed any sign of movement I would roll to my right behind my desk and go for my gun. Except I wouldn't get behind my desk. He'd blow my head open while I was still in my chair. We both knew that. But I focused anyway. It was better than wondering if there was an afterlife.
"Why won't I?"
"You're supposed to scare me," I said.
"You scared?"
"Sure," I said. "But a lot of people know I'm working on Emily Gordon. You kill me and it will make the case hot again. Your boss knows that."
"Don't mean I won't kill you," he said.
His eyes seemed wider and a little unfocused.
"No, it don't," I said. "But it means you won't kill me now."
"You keep pushing on the Gordon thing," the man said, "and we won't have no reason to wait."
"Of course I might kill you," I said.
He licked his lips and there were faint smudges of color over his cheekbones.
"Pal," he said, "if there's a next time, you'll be dead before you see me."
"Does it hurt when they pierce your ears?" I said.
He stared at me over the gun.
"You know, when they put that cute diamond in your ear, was it painful?"
He stared at me some more.
Then he said, "f.u.c.k you, pal," and walked out, still holding the gun.
20.
I sat with Hawk and Vinnie Morris on a bench in Quincy Market, where we could keep track of the young female tourists. We had coffee in big paper cups. Vinnie had a jelly donut. Hawk shook his head slowly.
"Don't know anybody sounds like your man," he said. "Like the diamond earring, though. You sure he's white?"
"Whiter than Christmas," I said. "Vinnie?" Vinnie leaned forward a little so he wouldn't get jelly on his shirt.
"Vinnie," I said, "jelly donuts are the single uncoolest thing a man can eat."
"I like them," Vinnie said.
"Honkie soul food," Hawk said.
"You know anybody sounds like the guy I described?" I said to Vinnie.
"Yeah."
"So why didn't you say so?"
"I'm eating my donut," Vinnie said.
I looked at Hawk. Hawk grinned.