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At one point, when Michael comes into my office, he catches me laughing at the computer. He darts around my desk, and takes instant note of my in-box filled with Richard Margo's name. There are at least ten in a row.
"Busted," he says.
"Whatever," I say, but my goofy grin suggests that I am, indeed, busted.
"What the f.u.c.k's going on here?"
I minimize my in-box and work hard at ridding my face of the guilty smile I can still feel straining at the corners of my mouth.
"Are you schtupping my boss?"
"No," I say with pretend indignation.
Ding ! My e-mail notifler rings loudly.
"Is it from him?" Michael demands.
I can't resist checking. It is. Which Michael sees over my shoulder.
"Holy s.h.i.t. You're so schtupping my boss!"
"There's no schtupping going on," I say.
Yet.
"Now. Can I have some privacy, please?" I say.
When Michael leaves, shaking his head, I read the latest from Richard.
I type back, "Yes." Then backs.p.a.ce and type, "Would love to" before clicking send.
I reread the entire exchange, beginning with another one of his weak attempts at a legitimate business purpose.
From: Richard Margo Sent: July 27,9:30 a.m.
To: Claudia Parr Subject: Timothy Lynde
Timothy Lynde just rang. He's interested in paying to take himself on the road for a book tour I think it's worth it. Any ideas on what markets might work best for him? Let me know what you think By the way, did I tell you I had a nice time at lunch the other day? Thanks for joining me.
From: Claudia Parr Sent: July 27,9:33 a.m.
To: Richard Margo Subject: Re:Timothy Lynde
I'll think about cities and touch base with Tim. He's a Mormon so Salt Lake's probably a safe bet As for lunch, yes, you mentioned that I had a lovely time, too.
From: Richard Margo Sent: July 27, 9:38 a.m.
To: Claudia Parr Subject: Mormons
A Mormon, huh? I went out with a Mormon once It didn't go so well.
From: Claudia Parr Sent: July 27,9:44 a.m.
To: Richard Margo Subject: Re: Mormons
Did she try to convert you?
From: Richard Margo Sent: July 27,9:50 a.m.
To: Claudia Parr Subject: Re: Mormons
No, I slept with her and she was excommunicated It wasn't good.
From: Claudia Parr Sent: July 27,9:55 a.m.
To: Richard Margo Subject: Re: Mormons
Shame on you. When did this happen?
From: Richard Margo Sent: July 27, 9:58 A.M.
To: Claudia Parr Subject: I'm old
High school.The 70s. What are you, Cla.s.s of 2000?
From: Claudia Parr Sent: July 27, 10:00 a.m.
To: Richard Margo Subject: And you're funny, too
Ha ha.
From: Richard Margo Sent: July 27, 10:03 A.M.
To: Claudia Parr Subject: You
I bet you were cute in high school.
From: Claudia Parr Sent: July 27, 10:08 a m.
To: Richard Margo Subject: Nope
I so wasn't. I was spectacularly lame.
From: Richard Margo Sent: July 27, 10:08 a.m.
To: Claudia Parr Subject: Re Nope
I bet I was lamer
From: Claudia Parr Sent: July 27, 10:10 a.m.
To: Richard Margo Subject: Re Nope