Ancient Manners; Also Known As Aphrodite Part 36

"Keep your presents! Do you suppose I care about them? It is yourself that I want, you, you alone."

"Yes, I know. But once again, I am not willing, and, as the consent of both the parties is necessary for a rendez-vous, I am very much afraid it will not take place, if I persist in my present views. This is what I am trying to impress upon you with all the clearness of diction of which I am capable. I see it is inadequate; but as I cannot improve it, I beg you to kindly accept the accomplished fact with a good grace, without prying into what you consider obscure about it, since you do not admit that it is within the limits of probability. I am most anxious to bring this discussion to an end. It can lead to no result, and might perhaps force me to be impolite."

"People have been t.i.ttle-tattling about me?"

"No!"

"Oh yes, I guess as much! People have been talking about me, don't deny it. They have said things about me behind my back! I have terrible enemies, Demetrios! You must not listen to them: I swear to you by the G.o.ds, they lie!"

"I do not know them."

"Believe me! Believe me, Well-beloved! What interest could I have in deceiving you, since I desire nothing from you except yourself?"

[Ill.u.s.tration]

"You are the first person I have ever spoken to like this . . ."

Demetrios looked her in the eyes.

"It is too late," he said. "I have possessed you."

"You are raving . . . When? Where? How?"

"I speak the truth. I have possessed you in spite of yourself. What I hoped from your complaisance you have given me without your knowledge.

You took me to the country you want to go to, in a dream, last night, and you were beautiful . . . ah! you were beautiful, Chrysis! I have returned from that country. No human will shall force me to see it again. The same event never brings happiness twice. I am not so mad as to ruin a happy souvenir. I am indebted for this to you, you will say; but as I have only loved your shadow, you will dispense me, dear creature, from thanking your reality."

Chrysis pressed her hands to her temples.

"It is abominable, abominable! And he dares to say this! And he makes a boast of it!"

"You jump to definite conclusions very quickly. I have told you that I have had a dream: are you sure that I was asleep? I have told you that I was happy: does happiness, according to you, consist in the gross physical thrill which you say you are so expert in producing, but which you cannot diversify, since it is much the same with all women who give themselves! No, it is yourself that you belittle by taking this most unbecoming point of view. I think you do not quite realise all the felicities which spring from under your footsteps. What differentiates mistresses from one another is that they have each a fashion, personal to themselves, of preparing and terminating an incident which, as a matter of fact, is as monstrous as it is necessary, and the quest of which, supposing we had only it in view, would not be worth all the trouble we take to find a perfect mistress. In this preparation and in this termination you excel beyond all women. At least, it has been a pleasure to me to think so, and perhaps you will grant me that after having produced the Aphrodite of the Temple my imagination has had no great difficulty in divining the manner of woman you are. Once again, I will not tell you whether it is a question of a night dream or a waking error. It is enough for you to know that, whether dreamed or conceived, your image has appeared to me in an extraordinary frame. Illusion; but, in all things I shall prevent you, Chrysis, from disillusioning me."

"And me, what do you mean to do with me, who love you still in spite of all the horrors that proceed from your mouth? Have I had the consciousness of your odious dream? Have I had my share in this happiness of which you speak, and which you have stolen, stolen from me!

Has one ever heard of a lover so amazingly selfish as to take his pleasure of the woman who loves him without allowing her to share it!

. . . This confounds all thought. It will drive me mad."

At this point, Demetrios dropped his tone of mockery, and said, in a voice that trembled slightly:

"Did you trouble yourself about me when you took advantage of my sudden pa.s.sion to extort from me, in a moment of folly, three actions which might have destroyed my existence, and which will always leave behind them the remembrance of a triple shame?"

"If I asked this, it was to attach you to me. I should not have got you if I had given myself."

"Good. You have been satisfied. You have held me, not for long, but you have held me, nevertheless, in the serfdom you desired. Today, you must allow me to free myself!"

"I am the only slave, Demetrios."

[Ill.u.s.tration: He freed himself from both her arms.]

"Yes, you or I, but one of us two if he loves the other. Slavery!

Slavery! that is the real name of pa.s.sion. You have all of you only one dream, one idea in your heads; to break men's strength with your feebleness and govern his intelligence with your futility. As soon as your b.r.e.a.s.t.s take form, you desire neither to love nor to be loved, but to bind a man to your ankles, to lower him, to bow his head and put your sandals upon it. Then, in conformity with your ambition, you can dash the sword, the chisel, or the compa.s.s out of our hands, break everything which transcends you, emasculate everything which frightens you, tweak Hercules by the nose and set him a-spinning wool. But when you have been able neither to bow his head nor weaken his character, you adore the fist that beats you, the knee that strikes you to the ground, the very mouth that insults you. The man who has refused to kiss your naked feet satisfies your dearest wish if he violates you. The man who has not wept when you left his house, can drag you there by the hair: your love will spring up again from your tears, for there is but one thing that consoles you when you are unable to impose slavery, amorous women! and that is to submit to it."

"Ah, beat me, if you like! but love me afterwards!"

And she hugged him so brusquely that he had not time to turn away his lips. He freed himself from both her arms.

"I detest you! Adieu," he said.

But Chrysis clung to his mantle.

"Do not lie. You adore me. Your soul is full of me: but you are ashamed at having yielded. Listen, listen, Well-beloved! If that is all that is needed to console your pride, I am ready to give you, in order to have you, still more than I asked of you. Whatever sacrifice I make you, I will not complain of life after our union."

Demetrios looked at her curiously, and, like her, the night before upon the quay, he said to her:

"What oath do you swear me?"

"By Aphrodite also."

"You do not believe in Aphrodite. Swear by Jehovah Sabaoth."

The Galilaean woman paled.

"We do not swear by Jehovah."

"You refuse?"

"It is a terrible oath."

"I must have it."

She hesitated, then said in a low voice: "I swear by Jehovah. What do you want of me, Demetrios?"

The young man kept silence.

"Speak quickly, I am afraid."

"Oh! very little."

"But what is it?"

"I will not ask you to give me three presents, were they as simple as the first three were rare. It would be contrary to the usages. But I can ask you to accept some, can I not?"

"a.s.suredly," said Chrysis joyously.

"This mirror, this necklace, this comb, which you made me steal for you, you did not expect to use them, I suppose? A stolen mirror, the comb of a victim, and the G.o.ddess's necklace are not jewels one can make a display of."