An Inconvenient Trilogy Part 31

They arrived at the farmhouse, to be greeted by two barking dogs. The farmer's wife came out to chastise the animals and greeted the two ladies with a smile. "Welcome to my home, I'm Mrs Hurst," she said as they introduced themselves. "I'm not sure if Miss Webster will remember you, she is wearing herself out trying to remember everything since she realised that there are gaps in her memory."

Mrs Hurst led the way through the large farmhouse kitchen that housed a cast iron range, a huge table and as many pots and pans as would grace any large residence. Beyond the kitchen was a small hallway from which stairs led upward, and a doorway to the parlour. Mrs Hurst indicated that the ladies should precede her.

"Please make yourselves comfortable, Miss Webster will be along shortly," she explained.

Elizabeth and Violet settled on two of the chairs and waited. Very soon the door opened and Charlotte entered. She looked pale and a little drawn, the bandage on her head was very much in place and she moved more slowly than she had previously.

She smiled shyly at the two ladies sat before her. "Mrs Hurst has said that I have spent some time staying with you, but you will have to forgive me, I don't seem to be able to remember," she explained with embarra.s.sment.

"It doesn't matter that you can't remember us," Elizabeth said quickly rea.s.suring her. "We can become acquainted again. What is important is that you are well."

"Thank you, I am improving all the time," Charlotte responded demurely.

"Oh Charlotte I am so happy to see you!" Elizabeth suddenly exclaimed, the relief of seeing her friend alive overcoming the need to be restrained and quiet.

Charlotte laughed at the outburst. "Thank you. I will continue try to remember everything. I am truly sorry that I can't," she said with a little frustration.

"Perhaps you are trying too hard," Violet offered. "It may come back naturally with time."

"That's what the doctor has said," Charlotte confessed, "but I am impatient. I'm having the strangest dreams you see and until I remember, I doubt I will be able to understand them."

"Perhaps we could help?" Elizabeth offered.

Charlotte flushed a little. "I think if I voiced them, you would think I was mad," she said. "It is more feelings I experience than actual events."

"You forget that we do remember the last few months," Violet said. "But we will not hurry you; you can tell us another day."

Elizabeth gave Charlotte the presents, and started to name everyone who had sent their best wishes. "Miss Fairfield sends her love and I know she will want to visit soon. Lord Dunham wishes you well. Lord Halkyn is keen to see you back at Dunham House and Mr Anderton sends you his best wishes," she said.

"They are all very kind," Charlotte said. "Please send my thanks and my apologies."

"So, no names sound familiar?" Elizabeth asked.

"No," Charlotte said sadly.

"Well my dear, we shall leave you now to rest, but if you have no objections we shall return in a few days to see how you are faring," Violet said, aware that she did not want to overtire the patient.

"You would be most welcome," Charlotte responded politely.

The ladies left the farmhouse and were silent for the first part of their journey. The silence was finally broken when Elizabeth sighed.

"Poor Stephen," she said with feeling. "I do not know how he will deal with seeing her, with Charlotte having no memory of him."

"I do feel sorry for him, but maybe all is not lost. It is still early days," Violet rea.s.sured Elizabeth.

"I hope you are correct. I don't know how Stephen will cope, if she has forgotten him completely," Elizabeth mused.

Over the following two weeks Elizabeth visited her friend every other day. Each time she was accompanied by either Violet or Miss Fairfield. Although Charlotte always seemed glad to see them, there did not seem any progress in her memory recall.

One day Elizabeth arrived alone. "Good afternoon Mrs Hurst, how is your patient today?"

Mrs Hurst smiled at Elizabeth, "She is looking forward to seeing you, as always, my Lady."

As soon as Charlotte had been discovered at the Hurst's farm, arrangements had been made to compensate the Hurst's for their trouble. They had objected initially, but Elizabeth had in her easy way persuaded the family to accept payment for their care of her friend.

Elizabeth had been troubled since finding Charlotte and felt the need to speak to her alone. She had insisted that before Charlotte was brought back to Dunham House, she had to know what had gone on in the carriage. Elizabeth was not sure that Charlotte would easily forgive her for the part she had played in the incident.

Charlotte greeted Elizabeth when she entered the parlour. "Good afternoon," Charlotte smiled. "Mrs Hurst has been showing me how to bake, so I hope you are hungry."

"I am always hungry for cake!" Elizabeth said, sitting down on the chair.

"As long as you remember while you are eating it, that it is my first attempt, for you might think that there may be room for improvement," Charlotte said with a grin.

The ladies ate their cake and drank tea while Elizabeth told Charlotte of the activities of Dunham House. She always mentioned Lord Halkyn, but there was never any sign that Charlotte remembered anything. When she had finished her drink, she placed her cup down and folded her hands in her lap.

"Charlotte I need to clear up something with you. It may cause you pain, and if you don't want to see me after today I will understand," Elizabeth started.

"Why would I not want to see you?" Charlotte asked puzzled. "You have been very kind to me."

"Because I was the cause of your fall!" Elizabeth blurted out.

Charlotte frowned, "I thought there was a criminal involved? Mrs Hurst told me that the Officer who discovered that I had been brought here said that we had been held against our will. The criminal who was trying to hurt you pushed me out of the carriage while it was in motion. How could that be your fault?"

Elizabeth sighed, "The gentleman was keeping the information to a minimum to prevent any scandal being linked to my name, but it is only fair that you know the truth."

"I'm listening," Charlotte responded, sitting back in her seat.

Elizabeth explained who George was, and the history of her family. She went on to tell of the days up to the coach ride to attend the church and what had happened inside the coach. Finally, she explained what had happened when she had asked George to release her friend.

"I had no idea he would respond in such a way, but I should have known that he was at the point where he just didn't care anymore," Elizabeth said. "The sight of you falling out of the carriage I will never forget for as long as I live. I had thought that every eventuality had been discussed between myself and Michael, but we hadn't thought that anyone with me would be put in such danger. We had wanted to prevent anyone else getting hurt."

Charlotte thought for a few moments before she spoke. "I had hoped that by hearing the story, it might help, but my memory seems to be stubborn," she started with a small smile. "With regards to your involvement, please don't let it worry you, you acted in such a way to try to save me. Neither of us could have known what he was going to do. It wasn't your fault."

"You are generous," Elizabeth said. "I just did not want us to become friends for a second time without you knowing the truth."

"What happened to George?" Charlotte asked.

"I shot him," Elizabeth said quietly.

Charlotte started to laugh, "Oh my goodness! Don't ever let me get on the wrong side of you!" she said with a giggle.

Her words lightened the mood and Elizabeth left the farmhouse feeling as a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Charlotte could forgive her, which would go some way to enable her to start forgiving herself.

Eventually after some weeks, Charlotte began to look more like her old self, Elizabeth made a proposition. "You are stronger than when we first started to visit, why don't you return to Dunham House and continue your stay with us?" she asked.

"But I don't remember my stay," Charlotte responded.

"I know, but perhaps if you return to familiar surroundings, it may help you to remember," Elizabeth suggested. "After all, you have only known this farm since your accident."

Mrs Hurst agreed wholeheartedly with the scheme. She was fond of her young guest, but realised that she would be more comfortable in a larger house with what she considered to be her own people.

All was arranged and Elizabeth and Miss Fairfield accompanied Charlotte on her return to Dunham House. Charlotte spent her time looking out of the window, trying to distinguish something in the countryside that would seem familiar.

"Don't push too hard," Elizabeth said soothingly. She could see the impatience on her friend's face.

"It is so maddening to know that those around me will have memories which I won't!" Charlotte said.

"Are you still having the dreams?" Elizabeth asked. They had not been mentioned since that first visit.

"Yes," Charlotte replied. "They are feelings more than images. I feel safe when I can see a figure, but I have no idea who it is. Then I feel sadness, as if there is no hope, but about what I have no idea. There are horses and a carriage and I'm afraid, but I expect that I am remembering the accident. It is very confusing," she explained with a shrug.

Elizabeth wondered if the figure was Stephen, but she could not say anything to Charlotte. It was not her place to interfere. She had told Stephen that he was welcome to stay as long as he wished, but once he had seen Charlotte, she was not sure if he would stay in the area. She did not know if he would be able to tolerate the torture of seeing Charlotte as a stranger.

Charlotte joined the family after lunch. She had been tired from the journey and had rested before meeting the rest of the party. She felt a little overwhelmed on entering the drawing room, but was greeted with smiles from the a.s.sembled group. There was one gentleman who did not smile, but watched her intently as she approached Elizabeth.

"Do you feel rested?" Elizabeth asked, indicating that Charlotte should join her on the sofa.

"Yes thank you," Charlotte replied with a smile.

Elizabeth introduced Charlotte to everyone. She was hoping for some sort of recognition, but could detect none from her friend. She felt real sadness for Stephen as she saw the way he looked at Charlotte, as if he had been starved for months and she was the solution to his hunger.

Stephen could not have taken his eyes off Charlotte if he had tried. She looked paler and thinner than before, more demure than his tiger, but she was still beautiful. She was still his Charlotte, although the irony was not lost on him. She was less his now than she had ever been; she had no memory that he could tease her with. Only his memory held the kisses they had shared.

As soon as he could he left the gathering. Charlotte was not really taking part in the conversation, but she was listening intently to everything that was being said, obviously hoping that something would help. He could not bear to be in her company with the difference in her. He missed seeing the way she had looked at him, the way he had been able to make her blush.

Charlotte had noticed Stephen leaving and for some reason had felt the urge to follow him. She could not explain why. As soon as she could she left the gathering, hoping to find Stephen and try to find out why she felt drawn to him.

She met him at the bottom of the stairs; it was obvious he was going out riding.

"Are you leaving the gathering Lord Halkyn?" she asked, not really knowing what to say.

"Yes. The social niceties bore me," Halkyn said in his usual bored tone. It had made him wince when she had used his formal t.i.tle.

Charlotte frowned at his response, but he did not think that he had offended her, she was obviously thinking deeply. "No, you don't like society much unless it is on your terms do you?" she said hesitantly.

Stephen's heart skipped a beat, was she remembering? "Tell me more," he said quietly.

Charlotte continued to frown. "I'm sorry my Lord, it was a fleeting moment, more a sense of something than a true recollection."

"It is unimportant," Stephen responded coolly. "If you will excuse me Miss Webster, I have many miles to cover."

"Are you leaving?" Charlotte asked. His words had caused her heart rate to increase. For some reason that she could not explain, she did not want him to go.

"No, fool that I am, I am not leaving," Stephen said with derision at his weakness, at being unable to leave the person that was causing him pain to be in the same company with. "I need a long ride that is all."

"Forgive my delaying you," Charlotte curtsied and moved to one side to let him pa.s.s.

"You are forgiven, tiger," Stephen said and without a backward glance he left the hallway.

Charlotte stood frozen to the spot, frowning at the empty s.p.a.ce that Lord Halkyn had filled. It was many moments before she shook herself and returned to the drawing room. She was distracted all afternoon, but was left to mull over her thoughts, as everyone hoped her distraction was a sign that she was remembering.

Chapter 21.

Stephen avoided Charlotte as much as he could over the following few days. He cursed the fact that he was making himself miserable by staying, but he kept negotiating with himself as to how long he should remain. It had initially been until Charlotte was settled, then it was until her colour returned. He knew that once that happened, there would be another reason he could not go. He could not leave her, yet he could not bear to be near her either.

He ignored the puzzled looks he received from Michael and Elizabeth, but he could not change his actions. Seeing her look at him as if he was a stranger twisted his insides as much as if he had been stabbed. When she spoke to him so formally, he wanted to shake her until she remembered, so he avoided her.

Charlotte knew Lord Halkyn was not happy in her company, and it puzzled her. The move to Dunham House was working in some respects, it was feeling more familiar and some things were coming back to her. Very often it was just feelings, or a fleeting remembrance of something, but she felt sure that what she was remembering were true memories, which made his behaviour all the more confusing.

She walked the grounds every morning, trying to put the things she felt in some sort of order. At times she did feel as if she was trying to process too much information, but somehow it was important that she did not just let memories come back naturally.

One morning she walked through the rose garden deep in thought. She did not notice Stephen was walking towards her as he was obscured by a hedge of roses. She turned and let out a little cry, startled at his sudden appearance.

"I did not mean to frighten you," Stephen apologised. He had not known she was there, or else he would have walked in the opposite direction. He did not like to put himself under her scrutiny.

"You do not frighten me my Lord," Charlotte responded. "I was startled out of my thoughts, that's all."

"You are probably the only schoolroom miss who isn't frightened of me," Stephen responded coldly.

"I'm no longer a schoolroom miss and apparently haven't been for some time. Although I can't remember it happening, I've been told that while I have been staying at Dunham House, I celebrated my eighteenth birthday," Charlotte responded tartly, but then she calmed down. "I've never been frightened of you. I have always felt safe with you, haven't I?"

Stephen paused before answering. At first he thought she may be remembering something, but he came to the conclusion that she was purely fishing for clues and her memory was not returning. He decided that he was not going to indulge her. "Have you? I can't understand why."

"Because you protected me," Charlotte said with a frown. "I just can't remember why."

"Oh well, never mind, I'm sure it wasn't important," Stephen said with disdain. "If you will excuse me, Miss Webster, as much as your company is delightful, I must continue my walk."

Stephen turned and moved away from Charlotte. She was not aware of it, and would never be unless she eventually remembered the circ.u.mstances, but she would have the unlooked for privilege of being the only person who he had ever protected now and in the future. He would certainly reject any similar situations, it had caused him nothing but heartache, which grieved and annoyed him, especially since he could not put it all behind him and walk away.

Charlotte looked at his retreating back with a frown. Something was not right. This was not how they were with each other. She could not quite grasp the memory and she almost screamed with frustration. She stomped after Stephen, determined that he would not speak to her in such a way, she knew he had not done so in the past.

Charlotte caught up with Stephen by picking up the hem of her dress and running. It was not a dignified way to conduct herself, let alone that she was seeking out a man, but she was determined to speak to him. Stephen had heard her approach, she was sure of it, but he did not stop. Charlotte reached out and grabbed his arm, later she would be mortified about her forward behaviour, but for now she just reacted.

"Yes Miss Webster?" Stephen said, in a bored tone, finally admitting defeat and halting.

Charlotte was a little breathless and gasped to catch her breath. "Why are you doing this?" she asked.

"Doing what?" came the bored response. Stephen was a master at making people uncomfortable if he chose and for some reason he could not help himself with Charlotte.