An Inconvenient Trilogy Part 13

"It is nothing, I just wanted to ensure that you are well, but in reality, I can see that you are." he improvised.

Elizabeth smiled at him. "Thanks to the care of Violet and yourself, I am very well now."

"Good! Come on, let's get the horses," Michael said walking to the door. He would mourn the lack of timing later; every moment with Elizabeth was even more precious now. He had been a d.a.m.n fool.

The morning rides continued, but one morning Michael had sent word that he would be late for their appointment, so Elizabeth had taken her groom with her. She liked to get out as early as possible as the park was always quieter, and it gave her chance to plan her future.

Elizabeth rode through Hyde Park on the back of the dappled grey Michael had purchased for her all those months ago. It seemed strange now, looking back, reflecting on the feelings of outrage that she had had at the constraints of a guardian. In reality, she had not realised how lucky she was, coming to London for the first time with everything taken care of.

Violet was aware of how she felt about Michael, she was sure of it, but she was not as sure that Michael was. Every time she had resolved that she should marry Lord Halkyn, an image of those warm brown eyes would float into her mind's eye, and she knew she could not marry anyone else. But, she had to let everyone know of her decisions. In two weeks it was her birthday, a mixed blessing. She would be an independent woman, but she would no longer have a close connection to Michael.

She had tossed and turned during the nights since her return from Yorkshire, determined to make a final decision and she had, but whether everyone else would agree to her plans would be another matter. If they did not, she would wait for two weeks and then do as she pleased, she had led the life of an idle lady for too long and it was making her lethargic. It was time to take action.

She was disturbed from her thoughts by an approaching horse and rider. It was clear who it was and although it was not an audience she was looking forward to, she hoped that at the end of the conversation the meeting would force, there would be the chance to start her life moving again.

"Good morning Lord Halkyn," she inclined her head as he slowed his horse near her.

"Miss Rufford, I had heard you were back in town. Was everything in order in Yorkshire?" Lord Halkyn asked pleasantly.

"Not yet, as there is much work to be done, but the estate shows potential." Elizabeth replied more cheerfully than she felt. She had never had this type of conversation with a man before and nerves fluttered in her stomach.

"I am surprised we have not met sooner," Lord Halkyn said. "Your presence was missed at the entertainments this last week. You had returned a few days before I was told you were in residence."

"I wished to remain quiet, while I thought things through properly." Elizabeth replied, knowing she had avoided contact with Lord Halkyn, and that it was obvious he knew that too.

"And did those thoughts include some consideration about my proposal?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, I want to thank you for your very kind offer, but I am not going to accept it." Elizabeth said quickly before she changed her mind.

"And is your response influenced by your guardian?"

"No! Not at all, Lord Dunham still does not know of your proposal. I have made the decision after much consideration and without anyone else's counsel." Elizabeth a.s.sured him.

"In that case I am sorry," Lord Halkyn said with a small shrug. "Some would say I should persist and try to change your mind, but consider me vain if you will, I want to marry someone who welcomes my addresses."

Elizabeth smiled, "You are not vain and it is only what you deserve. I like you very much, but I am convinced that I could not have made you happy."

"We would have got on tolerably well."

"I agree that we would and some people would think us very lucky, but is it wrong of me to want more?" Elizabeth asked.

"I hope you find more, if that is still what you wish. You have always been honest with your desire for a love match and I wish you luck, although with your guardian glowering in the background, it may put off lesser mortals than myself," Lord Halkyn smiled, looking over Elizabeth's shoulder.

She turned slightly to see Michael approaching and he was indeed glowering. "Oh he always glowers, do not mind him." Elizabeth said lightly.

"I do not, but I am in no mood to pander to him at the moment. Please would you give him my excuses while I go away and nurse by broken heart?" Lord Halkyn bowed to Elizabeth.

Elizabeth reached out her arm and squeezed Lord Halkyn's hand. "Thank you for being so understanding and being patient while I made my decision. I was flattered and tempted by your offer. I do hope you find someone who can care for you the way you deserve."

"Take care Miss Rufford, you are in danger of becoming one of the most sincere people I know. I wish you well." Lord Halkyn said with a wry smile, before turning his horse.

Elizabeth watched Lord Halkyn as he galloped away, causing people to turn their heads in wonder at such a noise so early in the day. She stayed still until Michael reined his horse in at the side of her.

"What did Halkyn want?" Michael snarled.

"The same as anyone wants on these outings, to pa.s.s the time of day with acquaintances." Elizabeth replied lightly.

"Do you squeeze the hands of all of your acquaintances in public Elizabeth?"

"Not all, only the ones I really like!" Elizabeth replied cheerfully. She might love Michael, but she would never allow him to wallow in his moods, or let him pa.s.s any unreasonable comments. She moved away with Michael following her. Elizabeth perhaps would not have been so at peace if she had realised that her actions and words had led Michael to believe that she had accepted Lord Halkyn's offer of marriage.

Chapter 19.

Two days later Michael joined Violet, Edward and Elizabeth for the evening. He had not seen Elizabeth since the ride in the park, and had spent most of his time expecting a visit from Lord Halkyn. He did not know whether it was a relief or torture that the visit had not occurred. He did wonder if they would wait until Elizabeth's birthday and then Halkyn would not need to approach Michael at all.

He had attended the gathering with reluctance, but could not refuse Violet without running the risk of receiving yet another lecture from his sister. As he now knew how foolish he had been, he could not face his sister realising she had been right. He sat slightly separated from the group, not joining in the conversation, but brooding to himself. Elizabeth brought him out of his dark thoughts by saying she wanted to make an announcement. Michael braced himself for the worst.

"I cannot thank you all for what you have done over these last months," she started, blushing slightly. "These last few days I have done nothing but think of what I am to do next and I have come to a decision." Michael held his breath. "I know it may seem strange but I wish to return to Yorkshire as soon as possible."

"Go back to Yorkshire? Whatever for?" Violet asked, wondering where this conversation was going.

Elizabeth smiled at Violet. "I realise you think I am strange for not loving the social whirl as you do, but it is not me. I would rather be outdoors, planting my crops and raising my animals. I have a lot to do, and want to get started as soon as possible. I need to return to my home."

"But after what happened?" Violet asked.

"The quickest way for me to put all that behind me is to go back and make happy memories there, to throw myself into turning the estate around." Elizabeth turned to Michael. "I know I should wait until you are no longer my guardian and I know I initially agreed to wait until the end of the Season, but it became clear to me very soon after my arrival that I was never going to fit into this world. I realised it even more when we visited the farm for the first time. The last few days have proved that I have so little time and so much to do. Could you please indulge me in this?"

'I have so little time', the words resounded in Michael's head. So she was not going to keep the estate forever Michael thought. The more she could do in the short-term would increase the resale value and if nothing else Michael knew she was a good businesswoman. She was probably intending working on the estate until she was married and then sell it. A good plan for anyone other than Elizabeth, since he felt she would wilt if she did not have the outdoors. He sat mulling over everything for a moment or two, but then seemed to rouse himself. It was no longer his concern. She had accepted a proposal and although it hurt that she had not shared her news, she was her own woman and he was going to have to stop caring about her. She was someone else's now.

"If Miss Fairfield is willing to accompany you, there is no reason why you should not go. The guardianship is in name only now. On your birthday I can arrange for the doc.u.mentation to be sent to Yorkshire as easily as I would have sent it here," he said, the old bored tone returning to his voice.

Elizabeth frowned slightly at the coldness of Michael's words. Normally he would have wanted to know everything about what she was planning, but he did not seem interested in her plans at all. Perhaps this was how it was going to be. The thought filled her with sadness, and a sense of longing she could understand, but could not act on.

"You can't go there on your own." Edward intervened, ever the voice of reason.

Elizabeth smiled, "I have Mr Lawson waiting for me and all the other staff. It will be no different to being on Papa's estate. Miss Fairfield will obviously accompany me, as she did on our journey down here."

"We will be very sorry to see you go." Violet said sadly, realising that her brother was not going to do anything to try to persuade Elizabeth to stay.

"Part of me will be sad to leave, you have been like family to me and I will never forget that, but I will not be sorry not to attend anymore card parties!"

Elizabeth left within the week. She had hoped that Michael would call and declare his undying love for her, but he never appeared. In fact, he avoided her; he made some excuse about not being able to join her on her morning rides, and did not visit Violet. She was hurt, but realised it was the way things were going to be. She loved him, but he did not love her. So, she left London with Miss Fairfield for a long journey with a heavy heart.

As the carriage left the London streets behind, Elizabeth leaned back in her seat with a sigh. "Yet another journey Martha, I hope this is the last one we have to make for a long time."

"Do you think his Lordship will visit?" asked the long serving member of staff who knew exactly what her employer had been feeling.

Elizabeth smiled a wry smile. "I should have known I couldn't hide anything from you. No, his Lordship won't visit, he has made it quite clear over the last few days that he wants nothing to do with me after the guardianship ends."

"Sometimes that is when a guardian declares himself." Martha said hopefully. She had known of such cases.

"Not in this case. There is something else, he has already said as much. I have no idea what it could be, but he would not say and I cannot force him to tell me."

"Well let's look on the positive side; at least his man of business will not be interfering with things that do not concern him." Martha said primly.

Elizabeth laughed, "Be careful Martha, I've never seen you react so to a gentleman, you are in danger of losing your heart."

"Will you write to his Lordship?" Martha asked, quickly changing the subject from words that had stirred b.u.t.terflies in her usually well controlled self.

"No. I have promised to keep in touch with Violet and I will, although it will drive me insane if I hear about Michael getting married in the future. I cannot let my feelings affect what is due to Violet. She has been everything that is kind and loving, and I will not repay her by ending the a.s.sociation now." Elizabeth said.

"I am sorry you did not get your happy ending." Martha said quietly.

"So am I Martha. So am I." Elizabeth whispered, tears blurring her vision.

When they reached Home Farm Elizabeth made sure that there was enough work to ensure that she rose very early in the morning and fell into bed late at night. It was the way to deal with the lead weight that she constantly seemed to be carrying around with her. Her appet.i.te was almost non-existent and it was pure determination that kept her going. Her thoughts wanted to dwell on the chocolate eyes that haunted her dreams, but she constantly repeated the words. "I have to get over him, I have to, he doesn't want me."

In London, Michael was faring little better. He avoided every entertainment that was offered and visited no-one. Violet was out of her mind with worry and even though she had confided in Edward, she had no idea how to reach her brother and help him.

Fortunately, Michael was to find the reason he was subconsciously looking for. Violet and Edward were visiting him one morning, a new routine, as he no longer visited them, when Charles interrupted the gathering.

"I am sorry to intrude my Lord, but I thought you would want to see this letter immediately." Charles handed the letter to Michael and waited while he read it.

Everyone noticed the sharp intake of breath and the deep frown that developed as Michael read. "Is everything well?" Violet asked, no longer able to sit in ignorance.

"No, Elizabeth is ill. Mr Lawson writes with the support of Miss Fairfield, to say she has been working herself too hard. Far too hard by the sounds of it, the foolish girl has not been looking after herself properly, missing meals and such like. She was found collapsed in the fields two days ago and although she has recovered, she has continued on in the same pattern. They thought it wise to let someone know."

"Sensible man. We need to go to her." Violet said immediately.

"We have no right to go, but I will send Charles to check everything is in order." Michael said flatly. His first reaction had been to jump on the nearest horse, and not stop galloping until he reached her side, but he could not, she was not his.

"Charles, please do not be offended at my words," Violet said to the loyal man of business, before turning to her brother. "Michael, what on earth can Charles do that Mr Lawson, Miss Fairfield and the rest of the staff won't have already done?"

"No offence taken." Charles said with a smile at Violet. He could not openly declare that his thoughts had gone along the same lines, and was relieved that Violet had spoken out.

"What can we do?" Michael snapped. "The best thing I can do is send this letter round to Halkyn and let him sort it out!"

"Lord Halkyn? What on earth has he got to do with anything?" Violet demanded.

"She's engaged to him!" Michael almost shouted.

"Is she? I thought she was going to refuse him. In fact, I was convinced of it." Violet said deflating at Michael's words.

"I saw her in Hyde Park with him." Michael said quietly.

"What did you see?" Edward asked, the first time he had spoken throughout the exchange.

"They were talking, she reached over to him." Michael muttered.

"She kissed him in Hyde Park?" Violet asked in disbelief.

"No! She squeezed his hand, but they appeared to be on easy terms, certainly not looking like a couple who had just decided not to marry!" Michael said.

"I'm afraid that is exactly what they were." Edward said. He laughed a little as brother and sister turned to him in unison, demanding more information. He held his hands up in mock defeat.

"I cannot believe you never mentioned anything." Violet said in disgust at her husband.

"Violet, let the man speak." Michael said impatiently.

"I saw Halkyn last night, he asked if it was true that Elizabeth had left London and would not be returning. After I had confirmed that was the case, he said he was sorry that she had refused his proposal, but he could not hate her for it. Her ideals about only marrying for love had touched him and he had decided to try and seek a marriage based on love himself. As he said, he had the money, so he did not have to marry unless he met the right person. I think he took Elizabeth's rejection very well." Edward explained.

"So she's not engaged?" Michael asked in disbelief, his mind jumping from one thought to another.

"Shall I get the horses, my Lord?" Charles asked quietly, but with a twinkle in his eye. He returned Violet's beaming smile with one of his own as he left the room at Michael's nod.

"We are coming with you. I do not trust you to sort this out by yourself." Violet said, rising and preparing to leave.

"Violet I am not a child!" Michael snapped, his mind racing with thoughts of what to do.

"Maybe not, but you have managed to make a complete mess of this so far, and I refuse to stand by and hope that you will work things out alone!" Violet responded firmly. "I will not be distracted. I am going to Yorkshire."

"Violet, she will not appreciate being invaded, you know how independent she is." Michael reasoned.

"You are correct, she would not want us all to arrive and there is no need at the moment," Edward interjected before his wife could say anything else. The set of her mouth showed that she wanted to object, so Edward prudently explained himself. "We shall await a letter from Michael. If he thinks we can do the slightest thing to help, we will set out immediately. For all we know, she could be as right as rain when he arrives. Let Michael go in the first instance."

Michael nodded in agreement and escorted his sister and husband to the door. "I only want what is best for you," Violet said quietly reaching over to kiss her brother. "Write to us the moment you have seen her."

"I will do everything I can for her." Michael said, but squeezed Violet before she left. Her heart was in the right place and ultimately, she wanted the same result as he did.

Chapter 20.