A Spectacle Of Corruption Part 23

"Do you suggest," Hertcomb asked, "that the Tory party is above seeking gain and advantage where it can?"

"I would never suggest anything of the sort about anyone involved in politics. I do not propose that there is no corruption among Tories. I am, however, asking about the philosophical foundation of your party, not the immoral practice of all parties, and I ask in earnestness."

Hertcomb quite clearly had nothing to say. He neither knew nor cared what it meant, in principle, to be a Whig, only in practice. At last he muttered something about the Whig party being the king's party.

"If a.s.sociation is of such importance," I said, "I should rather you had observed that the Whig party is Miss Dogmill's party, for that is reason enough for any sane man to follow its banners."

"Mr. Evans attempts to flatter me, but I believe he has, in a way, answered his own question. I choose to support the Whigs because my family has always done so for as long as parties have mattered. The Whigs serve my family and my family serves the Whigs. I cannot say it is the most upstanding of the parties, but I know that none are above reproach; there is a certain pragmatic approach that must be followed. Nevertheless, if I could wish all of these politics and politicians away, I would do so in an instant."

"So you mislike the very system you serve?" I asked.

"Oh, immensely. But these parties are like great savage lions, Mr. Evans. They stand over you and salivate and lick their lips, and if you don't offer them a morsel of food now and again, they will eat you. You may stand upon principle and refuse to placate the beasts, but if you do so, all that will happen is that the lion will remain and you will be quite gone."

When we stepped out of the carriage at Covent Garden, I immediately pulled Hertcomb aside. "You and I are used to being on friendly terms," I said. "Have I done something to change that, sir?"

He stared at me, his face slightly less blank than usual. "I am not obliged to be every man's friend."

"I should not think you are. But as you have been mine in the past, I should like to know why you are not now."

"Is it not obvious?" he said. "I have a preference for Miss Dogmill, and you think nothing of trying to steal her affections away."

"I cannot argue when it comes to affairs of the heart, but I believe my fondness for Miss Dogmill was evident last night, and while you may not have liked it, you continued to be civil to me."

"I thought of it more, and I concluded I don't much like it-nor you either, Evans."

"If I believed you, I would respect your words. But I think you're hiding something, sir. You may confide in me, you know."

He bit his lip and looked away. "It is Dogmill," he said at last. "He has instructed me that I must no longer be friendly with you, sir. I am sorry, but the matter is quite out of my hands. I have been told that you and I are not to be on good terms, but that we are to be on bad terms as often as possible, so if you will cooperate in this, you will make my task much easier."

"Cooperate!" I nearly shouted. "You wish my a.s.sistance in cultivating you as my enemy? You will not have it, sir. I think it is time you learned that because Mr. Dogmill demands something of you, there is no need for you to provide it."

Here a redness began to spread across his eyes, like the plague of blood in ancient Egypt. "He struck me," Hertcomb whispered.

"What?"

"He struck me in the face. He slapped me as though I were a badly behaved child and told me he would serve me more of the same sauce if I did not recall that we meant to win a seat of the House of Commons, and that end is not generally achieved by being overly friendly with the enemy."

"You mustn't let him use you thus," I said, in a harsh whisper.

"What choice have I? I cannot defy him. I cannot strike him back. I can do nothing but endure his abuse until I win this election, and then I shall make every effort to free myself of his grasp."

I nodded. "I quite understand. You must let him have his way in this, but you and I need not allow his opinions to rule us. You may tell him you said the harshest things in the world to me, and I to you, and he will know no better. And, if we find ourselves in Mr. Dogmill's company, you may be as unkind to me as you like, and I promise I shan't hold it against you."

For a moment I thought Hertcomb would hug me. Instead he smiled as broadly and as innocently as a baby and then grabbed my hand, which he shook heartily. "You are a true friend, Mr. Evans, a true friend. After this election, when I sever my connections with Dogmill, I shall show you what it means to be well liked by Albert Hertcomb."

I could not but be touched by his affection, even though I was not his true friend. I would not have hesitated to ruin him if it would advance my cause, and, though I did not view the world as Dogmill did, under the proper circ.u.mstances I might strike Hertcomb in the face as well.

The canva.s.s proved a strange and curious ritual. Miss Dogmill had a piece of foolscap on which the names of her voters had been written. There were indications if their political leanings were known to Mr. Dogmill, but most were not. I wondered why it was that so pretty a lady should be sent to so rough a part of the city to spread her message, but I found my answer soon enough. We visited the shop of one Mr. Blacksmith, an apothecary. He was in his fifties, perhaps, and had weathered his years not so well as he might have liked. When we walked into his shop, I thought perhaps he had never seen a creature so exquisite as Miss Dogmill in all his life.

"Sir," said Mr. Hertcomb at once, "have you yet voted in the general election?"

"I haven't," he said. "No one's been by yet."

"We have come by now," the Whig said. "I am Albert Hertcomb."

The apothecary sucked on his gums so that his face, in an instant, went from plum to prune. "Hertcomb is one I ain't heard of. Which one are you now?"

Miss Dogmill smiled sweetly at him and curtsied to show off the colors of her gown. "Mr. Hertford is the blue-and-orange candidate," she said.

The apothecary returned her smile sheepishly. "Blue and orange, is he? Well, those are fine colors, I reckon. What do ye have to offer me for the vote?"

"Why, justice and liberty," Mr. Hertcomb said. "Freedom from tyranny."

"I got as much of them as I'm like to have right now, and that ain't much, so try again."

"Half a shilling," proposed Miss Dogmill.

The apothecary scratched at the wispy bits of hair on his pate as he pondered the offer. "How do I know the other fellows won't offer me a better price?"

"You don't, but they may not offer you anything at all," Miss Dogmill said sweetly. "Come then, sir. If you will vote for Mr. Hertcomb, I will stroll over to the polling place with you right this moment. I will wait with you, and I will place the money in your hand myself." She took a step closer to him and placed her arm in his. "Do you not wish to accompany me?"

A great scarlet tide rose from the apothecary's neck and spread to his face and skull. "Gilbert!" he cried mightily. A boy of ten or eleven years appeared from the back of the shop. "I go to exercise my English liberties," the old man explained. "Watch the shop until my return. And know that I am familiar with every item in here. If there is one thing missing I'll beat you b.l.o.o.d.y on my return." He then looked up at Miss Dogmill. "I am ready for you to take me now, my dear."

It was clear enough that there was little to be gained from continuing the canva.s.s without Miss Dogmill, so Mr. Hertcomb and I accompanied the happy couple to the great plaza where the polls had been set up, and together we waited in line with the voters. Miss Dogmill brought the old fellow to the tally master, who controlled the approach to the polling booths and decided in what order men would vote. Although these men were meant to be incorruptible, in less than two minutes she had convinced him to add this voter to an upcoming tally. Meanwhile, she chatted amiably with the apothecary as though there were nothing more natural in the world than for her to converse freely with so odd a man. Hertcomb stood awkwardly, wanting to avoid my gaze all the while yet seeming to desire conversation as well. My efforts to speak of something neutral, however, fell flat.

At last the apothecary stepped up to the booth. Miss Dogmill joined him and waited just outside, and we joined her as well, so we could hear all that transpired within. There was no better way of ensuring that the half shilling would not go to waste.

The man inside the polling place asked for the apothecary's name and place of residence, and then, when he had checked this information against the voter rolls, he asked for which candidate he chose to vote.

The old fellow cast a glance outside the tent to Miss Dogmill's gown. "I vote for orange and blue," he said.

The election official nodded impa.s.sively. "You cast your vote for Mr. Hertcomb?"

"I cast my vote for Mr. c.o.xcomb if he's orange and blue. That pretty lady with those colors there will pay me good coin to do it."

"Hertcomb, then," said the official, and waved the apothecary away so that the wheels of English liberty might continue to turn.

The apothecary stepped outside and, as promised, Miss Dogmill placed the coin in his hand.

"Thank you, my dear. Now, would you care to abandon these political-type sparks and join me for a dish of chocolate?"

Miss Dogmill explained that she should delight in doing so, but that her duties compelled her to continue the canva.s.s, and so she left the old man both wealthier and happier than he had been that morning.

Not all of the names on the list proved to be so obliging. The next man we visited, a chandler, informed us that he was Melbury's man and Hertcomb be d.a.m.ned. He punctuated his thoughts by slamming his door behind us. Another fellow made us buy his meal in a chophouse and, upon our paying the reckoning, he wiped his face with a napkin, smiled, and informed us that he had already voted-for whom was none of our concern-and he was grateful for the bit of mutton. Finally, we visited a strapping young butcher, his forearms covered with blood as though he had just moments before been sticking them inside the cavity of a freshly slaughtered beast. He looked to Miss Dogmill and grinned so lecherously that had I not been in disguise I should have struck the fellow down for that offense alone.

"My vote is it that you want?" he asked. "I've heard there are things to be got for a vote."

"Mr. Hertcomb would be delighted to extend to you his grat.i.tude," she said.

"Indeed I would," Hertcomb said.

"I don't give a fig for the grat.i.tude of that scrawny bird," he said. "I want a kiss."

Hertcomb opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Meanwhile, Grace had locked her eyes on the butcher. "Very well," she said. "If you vote for Mr. Hertcomb, I shall most certainly kiss you."

"Then, let's get to voting," he said, wiping down his arms with his ap.r.o.n. And so we were off once more to the plaza, where Miss Dogmill once more convinced the tally master to let her man vote without too much waiting. She remained by the butcher until he cast his vote, remaining remarkably cheerful in the presence of so low a man. After he had done his business, the butcher then turned to Miss Dogmill and put his arm around her waist. "Where's my kiss, then, la.s.s?" he asked. "And don't skimp on the tongue."

Right there, before the world, she kissed him upon the lips. He pulled her closer and tried to force her mouth open, and he put one hand upon her b.r.e.a.s.t.s. This gesture brought the crowd, particularly those who carried Mr. Melbury's banners, to a cheer.

Grace attempted to pull away from him, but he would not release his grip. He began to tug at her gown in the most savage fashion, as though he intended to strip her naked in the middle of Covent Garden. A savage cry for Melbury Melbury arose at once from that candidate's supporters, who perhaps imagined that this ruffian was a Tory who chose to abuse a Hertcomb supporter, rather than a rascal who had sold his vote and now believed himself ent.i.tled to a rape in exchange. arose at once from that candidate's supporters, who perhaps imagined that this ruffian was a Tory who chose to abuse a Hertcomb supporter, rather than a rascal who had sold his vote and now believed himself ent.i.tled to a rape in exchange.

Though I had no desire to call attention to myself, I saw I had but little choice, so I rushed forward and pulled Grace away from the brute's clutches. She gasped for breath and staggered backward, righting her gown as she did so. The butcher now took a step toward me and sized me up. He surely had the advantage of size and youth, and I could see that he had every intention of pressing those advantages.

"Nothing like a Whig s.l.u.t. Now, you step aside, grandfather," he said to me, "unless you like the taste of your own blood in your mouth."

Perhaps I ought to have sought a more peaceable resolution, but after my encounter with Dogmill the previous night, I was in no mood to cower before this rough. Instead, I grabbed the fellow by his hair and yanked hard, pulling him to the ground. I pressed one foot hard on his chest until I could feel his ribs straining under the pressure, and then relented, only to stomp at him until he was quite unable to rise again. He grunted and made some valiant efforts to roll from my wrath, so I gave him one more kick for the mere pleasure of it. Then I raised him to his feet and pushed him away. Being a good fellow, he regained his balance and continued to run without looking back.

My performance received a warm cheer, so I bowed to show my appreciation, knowing full well that a refusal to acknowledge goodwill can lead swiftly to ill will. Somehow the fact that Matthew Evans favored the Tory candidate circulated quickly, for the cry for Melbury went out once more. I looked over to Grace, who appeared flushed and confused but not horrified. Mr. Hertcomb, however, was clearly out of sorts, and I knew that our canva.s.sing for the day had come to a conclusion.

I cannot easily describe the frustrations of that day. I only wanted Miss Dogmill to myself that I might hold her or, perhaps, inquire of her what she knew of me and what she intended to do with this knowledge. Instead, hours had pa.s.sed in close quarters with a rival while brutes of all descriptions had pawed at her mercilessly. I therefore breathed a sigh of relief when she informed the driver that as Mr. Hertcomb lived close by, he should be delivered to his home first. This news was hardly welcomed by Hertcomb, but he bore his displeasure silently if not well. After he was disposed of, Miss Dogmill suggested that we visit a chocolate house nearby, and so I held my tongue until we were seated together at a table. cannot easily describe the frustrations of that day. I only wanted Miss Dogmill to myself that I might hold her or, perhaps, inquire of her what she knew of me and what she intended to do with this knowledge. Instead, hours had pa.s.sed in close quarters with a rival while brutes of all descriptions had pawed at her mercilessly. I therefore breathed a sigh of relief when she informed the driver that as Mr. Hertcomb lived close by, he should be delivered to his home first. This news was hardly welcomed by Hertcomb, but he bore his displeasure silently if not well. After he was disposed of, Miss Dogmill suggested that we visit a chocolate house nearby, and so I held my tongue until we were seated together at a table.

"How did you like the canva.s.s?" she asked me, with her eyes cast downward.

"I did not like it much. How can your brother allow you to expose yourself to such brutishness?"

"He is quite good at exposing the world to his own brutishness, though had he been there he should not have treated that butcher with the mercy you demonstrated. I attempt to keep from him some of the more unsavory elements of what a woman faces on the canva.s.s, lest he forbid me partic.i.p.ating. I have, in fact, used a wide variety of deceptions to keep him from learning the truth of how brutal the canva.s.s can be for a woman. You see, it is the only involvement in politics I am permitted, and I should hate to surrender my role."

"And what would happen if Dogmill should learn the truth?"

Miss Dogmill closed her eyes for a moment. "Two years ago a carpenter to whom my brother owed some money grew rather desperate. He was none the most engaging man in the world, but Denny owed him more than ten pounds, which the fellow needed to feed his family. There are times when Denny will not pay what he owes tradesmen simply for the pleasure of watching them suffer and worry, and here was such a time. This carpenter seemed to understand that my brother teased him the way a child will tease a captured frog. So he sent Denny a note telling him that if he did not pay his bill, he would get his money by hook or by crook and that he would pluck me off the street and hold me hostage until justice was served."

"I presume your brother did not take this kindly."

"No. He went over to the carpenter's house, beat his wife unconscious, and then beat the man unconscious. He then took a note for ten pounds, spat upon it, and stuffed it in the fellow's mouth. He even tried to put it into his throat so he would choke on his money. I witnessed all this because the carpenter, in an effort to convince my brother I had been abducted, had invited me to his home, knowing I was sympathetic, pretending that he wished me to serve as an intermediary." She took a deep breath. "I should very much have liked to have stopped his violence, but there is no stopping him once he begins. I should hate to see him let loose with his pa.s.sions in the midst of Covent Garden while the electors stand by."

"I can understand how you might feel thus."

"You seem to have your pa.s.sions much more at your disposal, and I thank you for your efforts today. I cannot say that this was the first time I have ever been threatened, and it is a much finer thing to have a capable man by your side."

"It was my pleasure to serve you."

She astonished me by reaching out and gently, just for an instant, laying her fingertips against my jaw where Dogmill had punched me. "He told me he struck you," she said quietly. "It must have been very hard for you not to strike him back."

I laughed softly. "I am not used to running from men like your brother."

"You are not used to men like my brother at all. No one is. But I am sorry for what he did to you."

"Don't be sorry," I said testily. "I chose to let him use me so."

She smiled. "I have no doubt of your resolve, sir. No one who knows your name would make the mistake of doing so. I daresay my brother, if he knew who you were, would have hesitated himself."

"As you have broached the topic, I would fain discuss it with you."

She sipped from her dish of chocolate. "How did I know? I did the most extraordinary thing to make my discovery: I looked at your face. I have seen you before around town, sir, and I always remarked on your proceedings. Unlike some others, perhaps, I am not so easily fooled by the application of new clothing and a new name, though I think your disguise masterfully handled. The moment you came to see my brother, I thought I knew your face, and I could not rest until I hit upon it. At last it occurred to me that you looked uncommonly like Benjamin Weaver, but I was not certain until I danced with you. You move like a pugilist, sir, and the world knows of your leg injury, which I fear gave you away."

I nodded. "But you have said nothing to your brother."

"You have not been taken by the constables, so you may a.s.sume I have said nothing to my brother."

"And you do not think he will guess?"

"How could he? I don't know that he has ever laid eyes upon you-dressed as yourself, I mean-and there is no reason why he would suspect you come to him in disguise. He learned from Hertcomb about the chanting for Melbury and Weaver at the theater, and though he cursed at great length and with great vigor against Tories and Jacobites and Jews and the large franchise in general, he never once mentioned your name-Mr. Evans's name, that is. And, allow me to a.s.sure you, he was in no frame of mind to censor himself."

"Well, that is a relief, at least. But you know who I am. What do you plan to do?"

She shook her head. "I cannot yet say." She reached out and placed one gloved hand on my arm just above my wrist. "Will you tell me why you sought to connect yourself to him in the first place?"

I let out a breath. "I don't know if I should."

"May I speculate?"

Something in her tone caught my attention. "Certainly."

She looked away for a moment, and then turned to catch my gaze, her eyes as amber as her dress. I could tell that what she had to say could not be said with ease. "You think he had this man, Walter Yate, killed, and that he has put the blame on you."

I stared I don't know how long before I dared to speak. "Yes," I said in a rasping voice, just above a whisper. "How could you know that?"

"I could not reach any other conclusion. You see, if you had truly killed that fellow, as you have been convicted of doing, you would have no business with my brother. You would have no need to play at masquerade. The only reason you might take such risks is to prove yourself guiltless, and I can only presume that you now search for the man who did murder Yate."

"You are a very clever woman," I said. "You would do well as a thieftaker."

She laughed. "You are the first man to tell me so."

"So now you know all my secrets."

"Not all, surely."

"No, not all."