A Sketch Of What You Mean To Me Part 4

'That's exactly why. You seem so distant.' She answered.

'Just thinking about stuff.' I should start with a casual but not bored "Hey Fiona" and then...? That was the problem. I could not think of anything to say which didn't sound stupid.

'Have you looked at the brochures yet?' My mom asked, handing me the next pan.

'I have looked at them.' I stressed the looked.

'Kevin, you have been an average student your whole life but when it comes down to important things or tackling a practical problem one can count on you. I think selecting a college is important, don't you?' She eyed me critically.

'Yes, mom, I do. In fact, I will go on two more visits this and next week. Don't worry about me.'

'Okay. I will ask you again in a couple of weeks.'

The thing was, I was just always so tired after school. I couldn't bother with even more serious things. All I wanted to do in my free time was sleep, keep up my jogging schedule, hang with my friends and find a way to win Fiona over. The most interesting puzzle life had handed me.

I still didn't know what I should say to her, so, in the end, I just decided to go for spontaneous. My hand was shaking when I dialled her number. On top of that, I was afraid that I'd suddenly be voiceless. Also, I did not expect that she would pick up so quickly.

'h.e.l.lo?'

'Oh, um, hi Fiona,' I stuttered, 'this is Kevin'.

'Hey Kevin! I almost thought that you wouldn't call.' It sounded like she was happy to hear from me.

'Sure, I would. So far I have loved every second I spent with you.'

Silence at the other end.

'So, I came up with a fun idea of what we could do next if you are still up for it.'

'What idea?' She asked after a moment of hesitation.

'I will only tell you after you agree to come.'

'That's not a good deal, what if I don't like it?' She exclaimed.

'That's your risk. But no risk, no fun, right? However, you can be sure that I will put some effort into you having a good time since I don't want it to be the last time we meet.'

I heard her sigh. 'The thing is, I have a boyfriend, Kevin. Although we aren't so happy at the moment, I can't just end it. Or worse, have fun with another guy while I'm still with him.'

I let go of a long breath. It was as if she had punched me in the guts.

'So, you are saying...? I asked.

'I don't know. I also really liked spending time with you. You seem like a good guy.'

'Not so good that I am boring.' I replied, restoring my hopes a little.

She laughed. 'I didn't say that.'

'So, just agree to hang out again. You don't have to decide anything at the moment, we can meet as friends and enjoy each other's company.' I held my breath.

'Okay.' She agreed.

'Great!' I was relieved.

'So, what did you have in mind?' She asked. 'Curiosity kind of won the upper hand. I want to know what you planned.'

'I hope it doesn't sound ridiculous now but I at least, have loved it as a child and still like it today.'

'Well, what?' She asked again.

'What do you think about mini golfing?' I asked her.

'Yes, that's fun! But I have to warn you; make sure to bring a box of tissues because I don't want that the whole place drowns in your tears when you see how high you lost.' I could hear the laughter in her voice but wasn't sure how serious she was about that.

'You actually think that you are that good and are going to beat me, the master of 'hole-in-ones'? You will have to proof this to me first. I pick you up Friday at five.'

The game was on and, oh, how I liked it when a girl challenged me.

I arrived at her house on time on Friday evening, casually dressed in washed out jeans and a blue-white striped pullover. I also put an additional sweater in the car, in case it would get chilly outside. I even brought her a red rose from our garden. I hoped she liked this kind of romantic gestures. Again, I was so nervous when I knocked on her door. This time it was she who opened. She was enchanting in her flower skirt, the black leggings which made her legs seem even longer and this yellow blouse which distinguished her soft tanned skin. Also, she was wearing lip gloss and that certainly did have an impact on me wanting to kiss her on the spot. I had to brace myself to solely give her a kiss on the cheek.

'Kevin is here, we're leaving, bye.' She shouted into the house and grabbed a purse and a jacket like she was eager to leave this place. Her mother's demand that we shouldn't be back too late got caught off in the middle because Fiona already shot the door.

'Let's act like trees and leave.' She said and really looked like she wished to rush out. Fiona was already halfway to my car when I realized that I needed to start walking, too. It was her phrase that caught me off guard. I smiled and tried to close in on her.

'It's so funny that you said that act like trees thing. There was a time my friends and I tried to make up a new one every time we had to leave from some place.' I remarked when I opened the door for her.

'What, do you mean for example, let's act like a baby and head out?' She asked and when I was sure that she was buckled I started driving.

'Yes, or let's act like a drummer and beat it'. I said.

'Let's act like the polar ice cap, and disappear.' She kept up with me.

'That's a good one. I see you're going with time.' I said. 'I am impressed at how many you know from the top of your head.'

'To tell the truth, I looked them up on the internet. I love this phrases, famous quotes and poems but I am a lost case in trying to come up with something myself.'

'If you love something set it free; if it returns it's yours forever, if not it was never meant to be'. I recited.

She looked at me in disbelieve. 'How do you know such quotes?'

'When my dad was sick he had lots of time to read and now we have all these books of poetry and my mom sometimes read that to me when I had to go to bed. I guess it had the same effect like a sleeping pill.' I smirked.

'I wished my parents took their time for something like that. I hardly even remember any bedtime stories.' Out of the corner of my eye, I saw that she looked at me for a little while longer and then turned to face straight again, thereby shaking her head. I wondered what was wrong. The power to be able to read someone else's mind would be quite valuable at some times. The traffic light we were at turned to green again and because I was thinking about what was going on in Fiona's head, my car almost died off. That's the thing with old pickup trucks, some of them are stick shifts.

'Sorry about that.' I said.

'I am jealous already that you can drive stick shift at all. And I don't even have my own car. I have to use the one from the family which obviously is automatic. And by the way, it's great that you have a pickup truck, now I feel like Taylor Swift in one of her songs.' She grinned.

I've probably heard Taylor Swift on the radio before but it was not that she caught my attention. Women singing about how great love is or whatever, was not exactly my taste of music. But I made a mental note to myself that if I ever met Taylor, I'd thank her for making Fiona like my truck.

I turned into the parking lot of the mini golfing place and we walked to the entrance to get the equipment.

'Blue or green?' I held up two b.a.l.l.s. I was sure she would pick blue, isn't that the preferred color of all girls?

'Green please, that's my favourite.' She replied to my surprise.

'Mine too.' I smiled 'It's the color of healthy nature and the sea only looks perfect if a shade of green is mixed into the blue.'

'I like it because it's the color of Ireland. I love the Irish accent and the country looks beautiful. I want to visit it one day. I hope, I can do that during college'.

There was a clap of thunder. I looked at the dark evening sky.

'It isn't supposed to rain until later tonight.'

'The clouds look quite heavy though. I hope we'll stay dry.' She said.

'Let's better start the game then.'

Up to the 12th lane, which was the pirate ship, we were about even. I enjoyed the little chats we had and how she always seemed to tease me and how I had my fun in getting up with a good answer. Neither of us mentioned Ryan.

So, at the pirate ship, my favourite lane, it was her turn to go first. You had to hit the ball hard off a ramp, thus it could fly over the moat and then into a pretty small porthole. Up on deck, the ball needed to roll further to a steering wheel which was lying on the ground, past the wood of the handlebars into the hole. Fiona stood there, concentrating hard, alternately squeezing an eye closed and chewing her lower lip like she did at so many lanes before. It looked kind of cute. But I could see that she wouldn't get far in this lane. Her body was facing the wrong direction. Like that she would not be able to hit the ball onto its right flying path without having to make some very weird, crooked bat swing. But she was still two points ahead of me, so I "forgot" to make her aware of her impractical posture. She hit and who could have foreseen, the ball bounced off the wall of the ship and landed with a splash in the water.

'Too bad, but at least now I can go fish it out with the net. I love to do that.' She said.

And I can perfectly understand that because when I was little and came here with my mom we always accidentally hit the ball into the water, that I could go and be an adventurer, poke around in the muddy water with the net on a stick and catch the b.a.l.l.s. Fiona got hers and tried again.

'Shoot, I honestly don't know why that didn't work'. She exclaimed after it splashed a second time. She looked like she was a little mad at herself. Thus, I took the net and fished her green ball out of the water. I even polished it with a tissue before I handed it back to her.

'Voil, here you go.' I smiled.

She put it on the white spot and placed her body in the same position again. Now I felt like I had to step in.

'Hold on a second, Fiona, like that you will miss the port again. You need to turn your body a little.'

She moved her feet a few times. 'Like that?'

'Not exactly... Let me show you.'

And with that I stepped close behind her, put my arms around her to grip the bat, or I rather laid my hands loose on hers. Being so close to her, the sweet smell of her hair was much more intense. I hardly had the heart to breathe. I didn't want this moment to pa.s.s, touching her, her body against mine. Finally, I composed myself enough to help her with her shot. I turned my head a little to the left, towards the porthole. Now my chin was touching the side of her head.

'Okay, good, now we're facing the right direction. Let's do this together, on three.'

And together we swung the club three times and then hit. The ball flew right into the window. I was pleased but did not want to unfasten this hug yet. But then she turned and since I still had my hands on her bat she was even closer to me now, facing me directly. Smiling and with a sparkle in her eyes she gave me a kiss on the cheek and whispered a thank you. I could only nod in response, as stunned as I was. It was unbelievable what an impact this girl had on me. When I woke from my petrification, she had moved on to the deck already. I swallowed and concentrated on making my excitement go away.

When it was my turn, I managed my first hole-in-one.

'There is a reason that this is my favourite lane.' I said. 'And simply wait until we get to the 18th hole. I can't go wrong there either.'

'I guess from now on I have to put some effort into this, to keep up with you. Before, I did not want to show off and leave you so far behind.' She winked.

'Oh yeah? That was very kind of you but we will see who is the winner in the end!'

'We will see.' And with that she walked to the next lane, where she had to wait for me because it was my turn first.

We never finished the game. When we arrived at lane 15, big rain drops started falling heavily from the sky.

'Ahh.' She screamed, trying to cover her head with her hands.

This made me laugh because it was useless with these huge drops.

Fiona shrugged and started laughing as well.

'Let's hurry back to the car.' I yelled though the patter of the rain.

We started running but there wasn't much of a use when heaven opened its water gates like this. On the way to the entrance, we pa.s.sed a toolshed with a small canopy.

'Let's wait under a roof until the sky clears a little.' She yelled to dominate the power of the rain.

'Holy cow, what the h.e.l.l is that?' I wrung out the front of my pullover and water ran out as if it was a wet face cloth.

Fiona was busy with trying not to choke on a laughing fit and therefore resting her back to the house wall. When she could breathe about normal again she pressed out, 'I don't know, it's crazy. I don't think I've ever seen so much rain in my life.'

She combed through her hair with her hands and afterward let it fall loosely over her shoulders and her back which made her look extremely s.e.xy. I stepped closer to wipe away the black tear which rolled down her cheek since her eye makeup couldn't hold out against all this water. I held her face in my hands. Our faces were so close that I could feel the warm air of her unsteady breathing brush against my skin. This on the other hand made me hold my breath. She looked directly into my eyes. Her mouth was half open and it looked so inviting to be kissed. So, I slowly lifted up her chin a little more and bent in to meet her lips with mine. I simply enjoyed the soft touch of her mouth. When I opened my eyes again hers were still closed. She opened them with one of these commercial looks while a smile played on her lips. I leaned in to kiss her again. This time she put her arms around my neck. Our whole bodies were touching now. I could feel her body heat through our wet clothes and I never wanted this embrace to stop. I traced her neck with my hand and a little further down. Certainly, I would have loved to touch her b.r.e.a.s.t.s; I could feel them rub against me even better since her clothes were clinched against her skin. But I didn't dare to touch them because I was afraid I would lose control over myself. So my hand wandered to her back.

I lost track of time, I don't know how long we had been standing there like that. It was one of these magical moments when the world stops moving and everything goes quiet. It was only us and this moment. When we stopped kissing eventually, she drew her head back, at least as far as it was possible with the wall right behind her, and stammered 'wow'.

Yeah, that was all I could think of too. It was still raining, but not pouring cats and dogs anymore and so we headed to the car to get to a dry place.

In the car, I handed her my dry sweater. 'Here, put this on, it will warm you up faster.' I turned on the heat as well.

'Thanks. But don't you need it?' She asked.

'I'm okay, just let me do this to have some of your warmth.' I reached out for her hand. She smiled and our fingers entwined like it was the most natural thing. Then, she leaned back and closed her eyes. Her face took on a serious expression.

'What are you thinking?' I asked.

She opened her eyes. 'What am I going to tell Ryan? I just kissed you although I have a boyfriend. That's so not like me.' She let go of my hand.

No, no, no, I thought. This had just been so perfect.

'What do you want to tell him?' My stomach cramped up.

She brought a hand to her mouth. 'I don't know. I like him.' She paused. 'But I also like you. Then again, I don't know you that well yet. Was I crazy to kiss you?'

'No, Fiona. To me, this wasn't just a kiss with a person I only know for a too short amount of time. It was an expression of feelings. I had to kiss you because there are no words for how attractive and interesting I think you are and I don't think I've ever laughed so much with a girl just having a simple conversation.'

She bit her lower lip.