A Floating Home Part 7

'"Yaou put she in, yaou ought to get she aout," says c.o.c.kney Smith.

"She put herself in and spoilt our sh.o.r.e-goin togs," says Jim.

'"Look at here, landlord," says Lishe. "Me and Jim 'on't say nawthen abaout our togs, and we an' all will spend half the four paounds here in drinks. We can't say fairer'n that, can we?"

'That was getting late, so c.o.c.kney Smith agreed. So Jim an' all 'ad drinks, and then they pulled off and got warps and tackles and come and borried my ridin' light. As yaou knaow, sir, there ain't nawthen yaou can bend a warp to on that blessed ould wall, so a course they 'ad to pull off agin for a couple of anchors, and while the anchors was bein' got the others 'ad more drinks and waited for the chaps what was fetching the anchors to have theirs, too. Arter that they laid out them anchors on the weather side of the wall, and shoved some planks daown under the tumbril and 'auled that out pretty smart with a tackle on each side.

'When they come to start on ould Gladstone they was fair took aback to knaow rightly how to shift she, so they put the lanterns daown and 'ad a bit of an argyment. Bill reckoned she'd come off best the way she went on, but Jacob wanted to slew her 'ead raound so as she'd force her way off, cos she drawed most water aft. Jim said he den't want to think nawthen abaout that; he knaowed they'd have to lift she with sheerlegs same as unsteppin' a mast. Lishe said they mustn't do nawthen in a hurry and must 'ave more drinks to talk it over, so back they went to the inn.

'c.o.c.kney Smith kep' all on a tellin' of 'em to hurry, and the more 'e worrited 'em the more drinks they 'ad, and the slaower they was. First they tried Bill's way, and they wropped some sacks raound ould Gladstone's starn quarters to take the chafe. They only hove once, for poor ould Gladstone give a master great squeal, and when they slacked up she looked raound like as to say, "You fare to be enjoyin'

yaourselves together, but I ain't."

'Arter that they bent a warp raound 'er ould neck and hove on that till they reckoned they'd most break suthen. Ould Gladstone struggled a bit, but that warn't no use, and then she seemed to kinder go faint and we an' all reckoned she was a dyin'.

'Bill said ould Gladstone ought to have some brandy, but Lishe said brandy were paltry stuff alongside o' rum, an' he reckoned rum 'ud pull she raound best. So it were rum, and of course they den't never think to bring no bucket for ould Gladstone to drink aout of, so they had to use Lishe's sou'wester. Poor ould Gladstone den't seem to relish rum--leastways, she den't drink much of it. P'raps it was because Lishe had jist given his sou'wester a coat o' linseed oil.

Anyway, what little she 'ad seemed to bring she raound a bit, and she opened her eyes, which showed she warn't dead yet. Jacob give she the rum because he served on a farm once, and knaowed abaout horses and that, and he was jist a goin' to pour the rum away when Bill stops him in the nick o' time. "Here, mates, we ain't a goin' to waste good rum what landlord has to pay for for poor ould Gladstone," he says, and with that he finishes it.

'Then Bill and Jim started to rig the sheerlegs, and Jacob and Lishe laid the planks to keep the legs from sinking in the mud, and while they were a doin' that Lishe fell off his plank stern first in the mud, and Jacob laughed till he nigh fell off his, too.

'Then Lishe went off to the Ferry to 'ave a clent up, and a course t'others followed, all a lingerin' for more drinks.

'I never seed a merrier crew than they an' all was when they mustered raound ould Gladstone again. Well, they got them sheerlegs rigged at last, but 'adn't got enough sacks to put under ould Gladstone's belly to keep the ropes off 'er, so they went back to the Ferry 'an 'ad more drinks while two on 'em got an ould jib, cos they couldn't find no more sacks. That was gettin' late then--abaout ten o'clock, I reckon--and the tide was a comin' well up in the crick and landlord fared to be a goin' off 'is 'ead.

'Soon as they got back, they rigged the slings and hove ould Gladstone up, and put some boards under she for she to stand on, and then they laowered away. I reckon them boards was greasy or ould Gladstone was too weak to stand. Leastways, she fell off 'em, and Lishe and Bill laughed till they most cried.

'But the drink fared to take ould Jacob different, for he were wonnerful unhappy, he were, and kep' all on a sayin': "Pore ould Gladstone! that's a strain on 'er, that is. She 'on't go there no more." And when they come to try again ould Jacob made 'em wait while 'e mucked 'imself from 'ead to foot tryin' to put the sackin' more better so as to keep the chafe off ould Gladstone's sides.

'Then they hove ould Gladstone up agin, and thraowed a few 'andfuls o'

sand on the greasy planks; but it warn't no use, and when they laowered she daown agin she just slipped off and fell on t'er side in the mud. Them chaps laughed till they shook like dawgs, all 'cept ould Jacob, and 'e jist kep' all on a sayin', "Pore ould Gladstone, pore ould Gladstone!"

[Ill.u.s.tration: MALDON]

'Then c.o.c.kney Smith come along a spufflin' and a swearing abaout the time they chaps was takin'; and then they seed the tide come a sizzling 'igher up the crick, and that sobered 'em a bit, and Jim says, "We're on the wrong tack, mates; we must have them barrels what we used for floating _Hornet_ t'other day and lash they daown taut under ould Gladstone's bilges."

'"She's a layin' on her side naow, so we can't get at she to do it,"

says Lishe.

'"Look at here, naow," says Bill; "if we lash them barrels together, we can heave ould Gladstone up and laower she daown on 'em."

'"I reckon that's the way," says Jim, "but them barrels must be made fast atop as well as underneath, else they might shift aft and float ould Gladstone's stern quarters up, and 'er ould head 'ud be under water."

'So they got them barrels and lashed them together, and laowered ould Gladstone on top of them and made all fast, so as they couldn't shift.

They was jist a goin' back to the Ferry when Lishe says: "I reckon ould Gladstone ought to have a ridin' light up, so as if she got run daown the law 'ud be on our side, and we'd git paid all right."

'Bill said it warn't wanted, as they'd get the money as long as they got ould Gladstone out alive or dead. c.o.c.kney Smith said what 'e meant was 'e'd have to pay on'y if Gladstone come out alive, but 'e seed 'e might be alongside ould Gladstone if 'e said it agin, an' it warn't no use his arguin', as there was four agin him, and all three sheets in the wind, as the sayin' is. Anyhow, Lishe would 'ave the ridin' light up, so he took and made that fast raound ould Gladstone's neck, and he an' all went back to the Ferry.

'They all reckoned the money was as good as in their pockets, and jist carried on anyhow. Bill told some wonnerful yarns abaout poor ould Gladstone when she were young, till they most fared to be goin' to cry. And pore ould Jacob 'e did cry, and sat there drinkin' 'is rum and wipin' 'is eyes and sayin', "Pore ould Gladstone! that's a strain on 'er, that is. She 'on't go there no more."

'c.o.c.kney Smith he kep all on a dancing raound, tellin' 'em to go and look arter Gladstone, but Lishe, 'e jist says: "Look at here, young feller, ould Gladstone's all right; she's got 'er light up, and if any craft run into she yaou can 'ave the law of 'er."

'We an' all was that merry--for a course they chaps stood we a tidy few drinks--that us den't take no notice o' nawthen. That must 'ave bin just abaout high water, and ould Lishe was a singin' a song which 'e stopped arter every verse to tell ould Jacob to kep quiet, when I 'eard a kind of a clatterin'. That bro't me up with a raound turn, for a course I knaowed at once ould Gladstone 'ad flet, and 'ad got aout o' the crick by 'erself, and afore I could say a word there was 'er ould head a peakin' over the fence. We an' all run aout an' seed she a standin' there all lit up. That were the head masterpiece that ever I did see. There she was, wrop up raound her neck and belly with sackin', Lishe's ridin' light 'angin' under 'er ould neck, and them casks under 'er ould belly, and the sheerlegs acrost 'er back, and fathoms and fathoms of tackle and warps towin' astern, and the ould thing mud from 'ead to foot.

'Ould Jacob and they an' all was makin' a wonnerful fuss over ould Gladstone when I come away aboard and turned in. Next mornin' I seed ould Gladstone lookin' a bit pingly, but not much the worse, standin'

on the hard in the river and c.o.c.kney Smith a moppin' the mud off 'er.

'Not long arter that c.o.c.kney Smith sould the Ferry to Shad Offord, what's bin a sailorman and knaows haow to run a pub.'

CHAPTER X

'And around the bows and along the side The heavy hammers and mallets plied, Till after many a week, at length, Wonderful for form and strength, Sublime in its enormous bulk, Loomed aloft the shadowy hulk!'

When the match-lining was finished we covered most of it with three-ply wood in panels. We panelled the owner's cabin and the spare cabin with birch. We made the spare cabin to serve also as a drying-room, letting the back of the saloon fireplace into this cabin through the bulkhead. The fireplace, a handsome bra.s.s yacht stove, was bought second-hand from a yacht-breaker. Round the walls of the dining-cabin we placed a dado of varnished wood, and enamelled the cabin white everywhere else except on the ceiling (our furniture hatch), which we panelled. We panelled the saloon walls and ceiling with oak, and enamelled the window-frames and the uprights between them white. Throughout the ship where there was no panelling we put white enamel, making the whole interior very light. In every available place we built cupboards and shelves; not an inch of s.p.a.ce was wasted.

We arranged the bath like the baths in a liner. It is supplied with hot salt water, and the fresh water is used in a huge basin. The sea water is heated in a closed-in copper by a six-headed Primus oilstove, and a hot bath can be had in half an hour. From the copper, which is opposite the bathroom across the pa.s.sage, the water is siphoned into the bath, and if the siphon be 'broken' it can be started again by the pump which empties the bath. Cold sea water from a tank on deck (when we are high and dry we must have this) is supplied to the bathroom by a hose which can be diverted to the copper when that has to be filled.

It may seem complicated, but it is not really, for the children understand the system perfectly, and thoroughly enjoy playing with the waterworks. Sam Prawle never grasped it, and bestowed on it his customary formula about any device he could not understand: 'That fare to me to be a kind of a patent.' It may be added here, in antic.i.p.ation of events, that an appeal for help has sometimes reached us from a guest in the bathroom. On the first appeal the Skipper or the Mate goes to the rescue; but if a second appeal comes from the same person one of the children is sent as a protest on behalf of the simplicity of the waterworks.

The keelson is the backbone of the ship. Ours is about sixty-five feet long, roughly a foot square, and studded with boltheads. Right aft in the boys' cabin it is under the floor, but it is above the floor everywhere else. In the lobby it forms the bottom of the shelves; in the saloon it is covered with narrow polished maple planks; in the dining-cabin it becomes a seat; farther forward it is a platform for the copper; in the doorway into the owner's cabin it is a nuisance; in the kitchen it forms the bottom shelf for crockery; right forward it is useful as a seat under the forehatch or as a first step up to the hatch. In the saloon it is most useful to stand on for looking out of the windows.

We lost almost a day's work over a wedding. Harry's brother married the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. E. Pegrom. Mr. Pegrom, a platelayer on the line, asked me to give him a cheque in exchange for twenty-five shillings. And in the list of presents published in the local paper the twenty-five shillings duly appeared in the form of 'Mr. and Mrs.

E. Pegrom: cheque.' In our part of the world a banking account is regarded as a sign of wealth and also as something mysterious requiring a high degree of financial intelligence for its management.

I tried hard one day to persuade Sam Prawle to open an account. I met him on his way to the post-office to buy a money order for six pounds to pay for varnish and paint. I pointed out that a cheque would cost a penny instead of sixpence, and was also a safer medium. I explained that keeping a banking account was perfectly simple, as all he had to do was to keep paying in cheques as he received them and paying out cheques to the people from whom he bought his goods, always keeping something in the bank. After describing the process several times, I asked him if he understood.

'Well, sir, that fare to me as haow that's like a water-breaker. Yaou keep a paourin' of the water in and a drawin' of it off agin.'

I thought I had gained my point, as he understood so well, and referred to the subject again a few days later.

'Well, yaou see, sir, I 'ave to work 'ard for my money, and I reckon a drawin' of cheques makes that too easy to git riddy of it agin.'

When the decks had been cleared and the lines rigged on the stanchions round the bulwarks and the outside of the window-frames painted, there was some outward and visible sign of the transformation that had taken place below. The Mate was satisfied that the lines would prevent all but exceptionally unnautical children from falling overboard; and as she was quick to a.s.sent to the proposition that our children were not unnautical, there were no further doubts about the matter.

During the discussion of this subject a friend told us of the engaging argument about lifelines which had been addressed to him by a smack builder at Leigh. He was having a small bawley yacht built there, and when the finishing touches were being put on her the builder asked whether the owner would have lifelines on the bulwarks right forward.

'Yaou'd better 'ave 'em, sir.'

'No, I don't want them.'

'Now look at here, sir. Yaou 'ave 'em. All the bawleys 'as 'em.'

'I know. It's all right for knocking about trawling, but this is a yacht.'

'Yes, yes, sir. I knaow she's a yacht. But what I says is this: them lines 'as saved 'undreds of lives. And if they was only a goin' to save _one_ I'd 'ave em.'